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A Boy And His Tank [Mass Market Paperback]

Leo Frankowski
3.2 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (16 customer reviews)

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Book Description

Feb 1 2000
He was a rugged, hardened combat veteran who had gone to hell and back -- in virtual reality! Now he had to face the real thing! The planet New Kashubia was rich in heavy metals, but its surface was baked with deadly radiation, so the colonists lived in tunnels drilled in a thousand foot thick layer of solid gold. Lacking carbon, oxygen, hydrogen, or even dirt, they were the poorest people in the universe. But when they combined virtual reality with tank warfare, giving their warriors a close symbiosis with their intelligent tanks, neither war nor the galaxy would ever be the same. Not to mention sex . . .

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From Amazon

Leo Frankowski, author of the popular Conrad Stargard series, postulates a future in which the former Yugoslavia is still torn by civil war between Serbs and Croats. But now they've taken their endless conflict to space, and wars between minority factions are fought by starving workers symbiotically bonded with Mark XIX Main Battle Tanks. These sentient tanks provide for all their human pilots' needs (and we do mean all their needs).

Our hero, Mickolai Derdowski, is a Polish Kashubian who chooses to be inducted into the Croat branch of the army and bonded with a sexy female tank in lieu of being reduced to his organic components and used as fertilizer in the hydroponic vats. The real forces behind the war are the Tokyo Mining and Manufacturing Company, which makes money off the hapless Kashubians unfortunate enough to have colonized a brutal, barren metallic hunk of a planet, and the Wealthy Nations Group, which squeezes water from turnips all over the galaxy.

Like most military SF, the lighthearted Boy and His Tank is full of guns, girls, and galactic adventure, and Frankowski throws in a surprise ending that will make you either laugh or cry. --Adam Fisher --This text refers to the Hardcover edition.

From Publishers Weekly

Centuries in the future, on the distant and dirt-poor planet of New Kashubia, young Mickolai Derdowski is sentenced to death for getting his girlfriend, Kasia, pregnant. His only alternative is to become a mercenary, a human backup for the artificial intelligence and virtual reality capabilities of a Mark XIX tank. After training in the VR "Dream World" (and falling in love with Agnieshka, the female personality of his tank), Mickolai is sent to fight Serbs on the planet of New Yugoslavia. There he meets Kasia again, persuades a division of Serbian tanks to change sides, undergoes a crash course in military science and winds up a victorious commanding general. But in Agnieshka's VR world, nothing is what it seems, and Mickolai (and the reader) must wait until the end of his mission to discover what has really happened. Filled with coincidences and expository lumps, this novel's action scenes are too short, while its sex scenes are too numerous. Frankowski (Conrad's Quest for Rubber) has done better than this disappointing mix of extravagances and implausibilities.
Copyright 1999 Reed Business Information, Inc. --This text refers to the Hardcover edition.

Customer Reviews

Most helpful customer reviews
Format:Mass Market Paperback
A KASZUBIAN with Polish ancestry - parents - Ellis Island at a tender age in the very early 1900's; I am the youngest of 10 siblings, 5 girls/5 boys, expanded to continuing generations. I spent two spectacular weeks in Poland, including Warsaw and Cracow hosted by Poland friends met in Manhattan NYC - my first trip 1999 and the first sibling to do so. I am drawn to anything written by those who care enough about Poland and its heritage(s), struggles no matter the classification of media.

Frankowski's books got my attention due to the Kashubian & Poland connection. I read the author's sci-fi series but allow only two stars for the author's vivid imagination; his Polish name even though I am not sure of his ancestry and where his heart lies... and less stars due to the negatives for his presentation of the story(ies) with obvious outlandish chauvinism (resolved bachelor or not), his blatant and insulting unsuitable comedy of the Polish people, and his spite, bigotry, prejudice and discrimination throughout the whole series of his sci-fi pundits... his books do not "Stand Tall" in the science fiction category of reads. Readers look more for James Luceno; Kevin Anderson; Kathy Tyers; Vonda McIntyre; Matthew Woodring Stover; Kathryn Rusch, and so many more who deserve readers attention.

To readers interested in Poland's history - novels, etc. I strongly refer you to fiction and non-fiction translated classics by authors including Henry Sienkiewicz (classic "Quo Vadis"), plus his trilogy including "With Fire and Sword", trilogy made into theater movies in recent years, and don't miss Sienkiewicz's other novels; Nobel winner writer/poet Czeslaw Milosz (whom I had the humbling experience and honor to personally meet in Manhattan); author W.S. Kuniczak ("The Thousand Hour Day"); Norman Davies' "God's Playground - A History of Poland Volume I and II"; "The Way of My Cross" by Father Jerzy Popieluszko, the Polish priest who was brutally murdered for participation in the 1990's revolution led by Lech Walesa, and the shipyard workers; and I cannot fail to mention Nobel Laureate - Poetess Wislawa Szymborska. And don't stop there... and I cannot forget Massachusetts USA author - Polish Suzanne Strempek Shea and her novels such as "Lily of the Valley", and her own biography of her fight with cancer... there are many Polish authors and writings of people to admire for courage and talents, including patriots Kosciuszko (Foundation in Manhattan NYC), and Casimir Pulaski; classic composer Chopin; intellectualist Copernicus; and histories of the Jagellonian influences, with further reference to Poland's nobility.

The aforesaid are deeper in intellectual content vs. the sci-fi of Leo Frankowski. Outstanding are writers who call attention to beautiful country of Poland, its heartwarming people, rich culture, history and amazing architecture, but especially the strength through so many centuries of living through conquering factions. Frankowski is not one those writers; again, his imagination is lively but his "honor" to the people of Poland is more than ill.

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5.0 out of 5 stars When you live in hell WAR is paradise! Jan 14 2003
Format:Mass Market Paperback
The planet of New Kashubia is a ball of heavy metals in orbit about a pulsar that bakes the planet's surface with deadly radiation. The people are the poorest in the universe, having to import carbon, oxygen and even dirt. They live in tunnels drilled into the layer of gold because it is the LEAST dangerous metal to their health, giving birth is a crime and they go around naked because they can't afford clothes. You would think being inserted into a smart tank that will feed you, take care of you and allow you to do almost anything you want in virtual reality would be a good thing when compared to being sent to the hydroponic vats.
And it was a good thing...till you and your tank had to face REAL combat.
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By A Customer
Format:Mass Market Paperback
This is the first book I have read from Leo Frankowski. The only reason I came across it is that due to some genealogical research I recently found out I am 25% Kashubian and so have become somewhat obsessed with finding anything pertaining to that particular region/ethnic group.

My opinion of the bookï¿if you are a high school male interested in military sci-fi, and can fantasize about making love to a tank (literally), youï¿d probably think itï¿s great.

The part that bothered me the most is that the bookï¿s core plot actually had some potential, but was very poorly written. It should have taken place in an entirely different setting. Mr. Frankowski thinks itï¿s important to perpetuate racial stereotypes and conflicts, even hundreds of years into the future. In fact, the whole book is based on the ï¿Wealthy Nations Groupï¿ giving each minority its own planet. Well, after all those people are given their own planet, who the heck is left in the ï¿Wealthy Nations Groupï¿?? He never does explain. The Japanese, who are one of the wealthiest nations in the world is not part of the group, although they apparently live on Earth. The American Blacks are given a planet by the name of ï¿Soul Cityï¿ (puh-lease Mr. Frankowski, this is pitiful!), but he never explains what happens to the African Blacks, or any of the Hispanic or Native Indian cultures. However, we do know that the Chinese, Kashubians, Croats, and Serbs are all given their own planets.

But then the rules get even more confusing. He states that even if a person is one-sixteenth Kashubian that they have to go to New Kashubia, which results in both blacks and Chinese ending up on New Kashubia because someone in their background is Kashubian. So, why couldnï¿t they go to the Black or Chinese planet?? They apparently have a higher percentage of those ethnic groups in their background. And if you are required to move with only one-sixteenth of a ï¿minorityï¿sï¿ bloodline in you, well, as I said before, very few people would be left on Earth.

This is definitely a male fantasy book. The only thing I found to fantasize about, as a female, was the picture of Mickolai on the cover. If all male Kashubians looked that way, Iï¿d speed up my planned trip to Kaszuby. Heck, Iï¿d even spend the time to learn the Kashubian dialect! But, alas, the picture is probably only indicative of how Kashubians look in Frankowskiï¿s Dream World.

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Most recent customer reviews
4.0 out of 5 stars Light and human military SF
New Kashubia is a planet of almost pure wealth. When its star went nova, the lighter elements were blown away leaving a complete planet of molten metal--which then cooled in neat... Read more
Published on Jun 24 2002 by booksforabuck
5.0 out of 5 stars A Boy and His Tank
Best book in my collection I just hope there will be a sequel coming out soon. the ending leaves you wonting more and then you find out that your not going to get it. Read more
Published on April 19 2002 by Michael Kenney
4.0 out of 5 stars Good for what it is...pulp, pulp, pulp
This is a 4-star rating for books in this genre, not 4 stars against my other rated books. That said, this is really good pulp sci-fi. Read more
Published on Jun 21 2001 by Michael F. Maddox
1.0 out of 5 stars Suprise ending means I'll never trust Frank again
I loved the paperback but I will never be able to trust the author after I discovered the 'surprise' ending in the hardcover. Read more
Published on April 7 2001 by "jcaldwel@indy.com"
1.0 out of 5 stars War Ain't Pretty - Neither Is This Book
Leo Frankowski answers the time old question of what happens when a good author goes bad. Into a future feudalistic society in which Serbians and Croatians are still killing each... Read more
Published on Jun 22 2000 by Robroy A. Mccandless
4.0 out of 5 stars FROM A KASZUBIAN (POLISH-AMERICAN) VIEWPOINT...
I appreciate the reviewers who have given impetus to decision on whether to read or not to read. This book was brought to my attention because of the Kashubian element. Read more
Published on Mar 15 2000
5.0 out of 5 stars A Boy & His Tank is too Political
This is the first book I read of Leo's, and I enjoyed it for its action and technological bs. The technical advances were, well ... magnetic, shall we say? Read more
Published on Mar 9 2000 by Mike Varela
3.0 out of 5 stars Interesting premise, mediocre execution
Frankowski ventures into territory charted by Drake, Laumer, Heinlein, and Saberhagen, and actually comes up with a number of original twists on the theme of space-age armored... Read more
Published on Feb 21 2000 by Ben Klausner
2.0 out of 5 stars Vintage Frankowski, for good or bad
This is a fairly typical Frankowski novel, written in a typical Frankowski voice. If you have read any of his other novels, you'll recognize the narrator by his self-righteous yet... Read more
Published on Feb 10 2000 by Gregory
3.0 out of 5 stars Not bad for a Frankowskiesque future setting
I just finished this book, and I enjoyed it. I have read all of his novels and this is the first that takes place in the distant future on different worlds. Not a bad attempt.
Published on July 1 1999
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