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Comment: Cover shows light shelf wear and is creased in a couple of spots. Otherwise in excellent condition for a used book with clean pages.
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A Complicated Kindness Paperback – May 1 2007

3.3 out of 5 stars 46 customer reviews

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Product Details

  • Paperback: 256 pages
  • Publisher: Vintage Canada (May 1 2007)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0676978568
  • ISBN-13: 978-0676978568
  • Product Dimensions: 13.2 x 2.1 x 20.3 cm
  • Shipping Weight: 272 g
  • Average Customer Review: 3.3 out of 5 stars 46 customer reviews
  • Amazon Bestsellers Rank: #7,502 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
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Product Description

From Amazon

A Complicated Kindness, Miriam Toews's third novel, is a very funny book about going AWOL in Mennonite country. Sixteen-year-old Nomi Nickel lives with her depressingly cheerful dad Ray on the edge of East Village--not the hip one in New York City where she would prefer to be but a small, backward Mennonite town in Manitoba ruled by a pious pastor whom Nomi calls The Mouth. Several years before, Nomi's rebellious older sister, Tash, left town on the back of her rocker boyfriend's motorcycle. Not long afterwards, her mother, Trudi, also disappeared for reasons never fully disclosed. As Nomi explains at the outset, "Half of our family, the better-looking half, is missing."

As Nomi drives endlessly about the countryside with her own Lou Reed-loving boyfriend and puts off finishing an assignment for her oddly attentive English teacher, she pieces together her childhood memories in an effort to understand why she and Ray have been deserted. Toews's portrayal of teenage angst, Mennonite-style, is hilarious. East Village, Nomi observes, "was created as a kind of no-frills bunker in which to live austerely, shun wrongdoers and kill some time, and joy, before the Rapture." Regarding the pleasures of the next world, she quips, "I guess we'll be able to float around asking people to punch us in the stomach as hard as they can and not experience any pain, which could be fun for one afternoon." Nomi's steady patter of repartee and reminiscences grows a bit tiresome after a while, especially as this is a novel in which very little happens until the last 50 pages. Toews can't seem to resist a good one-liner, even at the expense of plot. For a light summer read with laugh-out-loud potential, however, A Complicated Kindness is the ticket. --Lisa Alward --This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.

From Publishers Weekly

A 16-year-old rebels against the conventions of her strict Mennonite community and tries to come to terms with the collapse of her family in this insightful, irreverent coming-of-age novel. In bleak rural Manitoba, Nomi longs for her older sister, Tash ("she was so earmarked for damnation it wasn't even funny"), and mother, Trudie, each of whom has recently fled fundamentalist Christianity and their town. Her gentle, uncommunicative father, Ray, isn't much of a sounding board as Nomi plunges into bittersweet memory and grapples with teenage life in a "kind of a cult with pretend connections to some normal earthly conventions." Once a "curious, hopeful child" Nomi now relies on biting humor as her life spins out of control—she stops attending school, shaves her head and wanders around in a marijuana-induced haze—while Ray sells off most of their furniture, escapes on all-night drives and increasingly withdraws into himself. Still, she and Ray are linked in a tender, if fragile, partnership as each slips into despair. Though the narration occasionally unravels into distracting stream of consciousness, the unsentimental prose and the poignant character interactions sustain reader interest. Bold, tender and intelligent, this is a clear-eyed exploration of belief and belonging, and the irresistible urge to escape both.
Copyright © Reed Business Information, a division of Reed Elsevier Inc. All rights reserved. --This text refers to the Hardcover edition.

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Top Customer Reviews

Format: Paperback
I was reminded so many times while reading A COMPLICATED KINDNESS of the book THE BARK OF THE DOGWOOD with its themes of family dysfunction, memory, repressed memories, struggles to freedom, and a host of other scenarios and ideas that played throughout this novel. Set in Manitoba, Nomi is the main character who struggles with her famlies religious zealousness and fragile existence. Dealing with the Mennonites and a coming-of-age tale that is anything but unusual, you'll find yourself drawn to this story in a way that won't let you put the book down. But the novel isn't all darkness. There's a great deal of humor and wit in it. If you liked the novels THE KITE RUNNER and BARK OF THE DOGWOOD, then this book will work for you. Of couse, the settings are entirely different for all three, but the same themes of struggle are there. Great stuff, all.
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Format: Hardcover
I found this book fascinating. On first reading, this book seemed to be one teenager's long downward spiral into depression, interspersed with a few beautiful or humorous moments. But a shadowy glimpse of a some more complex themes drew me back to it for a second reading, where I was delighted to find the writing tight and full of well-chosen imagery and recurring themes.
The narrator, Nomi, writes near the beginning: "People here just can't wait to die, it seems. It's the main event. The only reason we're not all snuffed at birth is because that would reduce our suffering by a lifetime. My guidance counsellor has suggested to me that I change my attitude about this place and learn to love it. But I do, I told her. Oh, that's rich, she said. That's rich."
Nomi chafes against the inflexibility and lack of forgiveness in many members of her religious community, but as she struggles to understand the undercurrents which have driven her mother and elder sister into the void beyond the town, she begins to be able to tap into the honesty of her family to imagine something bigger and better than the only place she knows. "I have a problem with endings," she writes, and she cannot satisfy her English teacher by drawing her essays to a neat close. In the same way, she can't seem to accept her pastor uncle's neat package of rigid definitions explaining her existence, with no mysteries or forgiveness for weakness. When a nurse at the hospital criticises her invalid friend Lydia for being so needy, Nomi objects 'But isn't that what a hosp...(ital is for?)" When the church throws out a man for being unable to overcome alcoholism, the reader wants to ask, "But isn't that what a church community is for?
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By A Customer on Jan. 21 2006
Format: Paperback
I can't belive all the negative reviews. I loved this book. I've lent it to 5 people (all of them loved it) and I have a few more friends inline to read it. I laughed out-loud many times, my family even has little inside jokes about some of the characters. "Hide the sponge" is enough to send us into fits of giggles.
I loved the way the novel was written. The jumpy, sometimes confusing style reflects the way a young girl would tell a story. Listen to how teenage girls speak- Toews nailed it. It isn't the story of a grown woman looking back on her childhood, it would have spoiled the story had it been written in an adult tone.

The novel struck a chord with me as my family was disowned by the Mennonite community about 60 years ago. I had always wondered what it would have been like if I had been raised a Mennonite. This novel did a wonderful job of answering a lot of my questions. It's hilarious and heart-breaking at the same time. Oh, so highly recommended!
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Format: Paperback
Miriam Toews' novel, A Complicated Kindness, is an intriguing, almost voyeuristic look into an unfamiliar culture. It is essentially about a young girl's life growing up in an oppressive, small town, where her family and community are trapped in legalistic religious traditions. It is an example of how, in this case Christianity, but any religion for that matter, can destroy a family and community when the essential love, hope and forgiveness are removed from the tenets of their faith. Still, Toews is careful to show that even the most messed up religious fanatics have their own brand of kindness--however complicated it may be. The book held my interest throughout as I felt a strong empathy for the heroine and her family. I would recommend it to anyone who enjoys reading about religion gone amuck, other people's culture, or a young woman coming of age in difficult circumstances. Here's a warning though: it is not for those looking for an uplifting, light read or a tidy and hope-filled ending, as it is injected with sardonic humour and biting realism throughout the book.
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Format: Paperback
I have picked this book up 3 times and tried to read it, still trying to get through it. It is just not grabbing me from the start.
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Format: Hardcover
Boy, what an appropriate title for this book. Really, this novel is a study in the contradictions of life: moving ahead into adulthood vs leaving behind childhood with its odd combination of security and non-security. While reading about the downward emotional spiral of a teenager may not sound like the thing you'd want to take to bed each night, trust me, this is one powerful and excellent novel. I was reminded at times of the books of Wally Lamb or even Jackson McCrae (think Lamb's "Shes Come Undone" or McCrae's "The Children's Corner"), but in the end "A Complicated Kindness" really stands on its own. What's also amazing is that it can be read by adolescents and adults alike, and each will probably get something great out of it.
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