Dr. Colbert has done an amazing job writing this book which promises to change the lives of thousands of suffering people. Just like Job suffered (My bowels boiled, and rested not: Job 30:26-27), many of us are afflicted with IBS. For some time now I have been working with doctors and keeping up with the latest scientific research in order to find a cure, or at least some reduction in symptoms. As it turns out, all I had to do was pray! Dr. Colbert recommends passages of scripture that will heal my intestinal distress!
Sure, OK, I guess if you follow this line of reasoning, you end up understanding that God gave me IBS in the first place. And sure, it seems like all of the explosive diarrhea, painful and loud gas passing during church services, and the spray painting of all the gas station toilets along my route home is a pretty cruel way of getting me to pray and believe in Him. But isn't it logical that if God is the one who caused me to empty my rectum every 10 minutes, He would be the only one who could stop the brown flood of death? Sure it does. Now, please excuse me while I pray to the porcelain god...