Botched (UNCUT)

I saw this late one night on cable. I stopped to see it for Stephen Dorff, but soon recognized other actors and kept watching. This is so not my genre, but it was so far fetched and absolutely hilarious that I ended up watching the whole thing! Then I got online and purchased a copy. My friends and sis laughed their heads off! It's a spoof of all those other horror films you've either seen (or in my case, heard of).

First off this movie isn't to be taken seriously. It's a quirky, silly horror-comedy so if you expect something serious then you don't need to bother with this film.

Botched is about an American thief in Russia (Stephen Dorff) who teams up with two Russian brothers to rob a highrise. They soon get trapped by who they think are the cops but when heads starting flying off and people start getting hacked they realize they've made a mistake.

While trying to devise a plan of escape the three robbers meet up with an elevator of people who they take hostage. After that some of the hostages are picked off one by one by a crazed barbarian serial killer and from there this cute comedy springs some surprising and hilarious twists.

I was shocked I enjoyed this movie because I didn't expect much. I love to laugh and this film got some good chuckles from me. It's not award-winning material of course but it keeps you entertained. This is one of those films just to watch to pass the time. I caught it on cable and if something better had been on I wouldn't have watched it but being a Stephen Dorff fan (even though his movies are horrible), I gave it a try.

Anyone who has followed Dorff's career might agree that Botched is definitely not one of his worst films. In fact it's the best he's made in a while. I loved seeing him in a comedic role. He has a sort of sexy, dry humor thing happening and maybe he should venture more into comedy from now on.

The movie is fast-paced and the characters are all interesting. Some are stereotypical but that's the beauty of them.

So if you're looking for a film that's sure to be a little fun then Botched might be up your alley. Just don't expect too much.

After a diamond heist gone wrong, Ritchie (Stephen Dorff) must make amends with his Russian mafia connections on another job. Inside a luxurious penthouse the caper goes awry. Teamed with the Russian version of Laurel and Hardy, Ritchie and the group is trapped on an undeveloped floor with a psycho who is equally involved in LARPing, ballet, and murder.

The most unfortunate aspect of Botched is the title describes the execution. It's a poor attempt at the horror/comedy blend where the horror isn't scary and the comedy isn't funny. Throw in disco lights and a few Scooby Doo chase scenes to make it worse. I'd be remiss if I didn't mention an atrocious, tone-def, misfiring score. It's Addam's Family, carnival, Italian restaurant, Benny Hill, and Tetris theme song all rolled into one. Worst score in movie history.

For whatever reason the movie is set in Russia, where all of the actors aside from the perpetually dramatic Dorff butcher Russian accents filled with inaccuracies and inconsistencies. Speaking of butchering, look for the Ed Gein inspired wallpaper midway through the film; it's the fraction that's even remotely creepy. As for funny, there's a cheap fart scene. If you're considering watching this travesty, I'd recommend treating it like gas: pass it.

Jason Elin