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Jesus Christ Vampire Hunter [Blu-ray] [Import]

Josh Grace , Murielle Varhelyi , Lee Gordon Demarbre    Unrated   Blu-ray
3.8 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (25 customer reviews)
Price: CDN$ 14.95 & FREE Shipping on orders over CDN$ 25. Details
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Most helpful customer reviews
3 of 3 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Hilarious Film From My Home Town July 20 2006
Format:DVD
Ok, Honestly when i first heard about this movie I thought it would suck. I started watching it 3/4 way through because i missed the rest of it. Something else was on. Then one day I saw it in my Interactive TV guide and I was thinking...I HAVE TO SEE THIS MOVIE. Then suddenly these little hints started coming out to me....OTTAWA SUN newspaper box and then suddenly what looked like OTTAWA CITIZEN but slightly altered. Then the walk through the War Memorial with the Art Centre in the background then seeing the quick glimpse of RIDEAU CENTRE. Something this small recorded here in Ottawa has actually made it on TV. Especially made by Carleton U students. Such an inspiration for me to try to do something similar. If IFC will play this, they'll play anything...AMAZING MOVIE.
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2 of 2 people found the following review helpful
Format:DVD
I won't pull any punches here. This film is pure genious. I have never seen a movie with such power as this. I can only hope Mel Gibson's movie will have this big of an impact. The truth is though that these guys did it without a 25 million dollar budget.
What fool would ask Jesus if He had enough lemonade? I mean c'mon how could lemonade be harder than loaves and fishes. Well the doubter gets killed pretty early in the movie. It's too bad, I think they should have expanded on a priest with a mohawk. The custom helmet they had for him was supercool.
Mary Magna is bad to the bone folks. She gets sucked into a vampire's world, but the Lord not only gets her back, he gives her the main vampire after he cures her too. You see the whole point of this film is the church must protect lesbians from vampires. Yeah I know, I know. Hey this flick's from Canada.
The scene that left me screaming 'Amen' and 'Allelujia' was the fight scene with the athiests. I mean dude, Jesus beats up like 60 athiests without a break. They just keep coming out of this one car.
Jesus finally defeats the vampires when He himself is stabbed through the heart in the climatic junkyard battle. But with Him being punctured, Heaven's light shines through him and the vampires are vanquished. Outstanding special effects on this one. A flashlight and flash powder really did the trick.
Also look for the fine performance by Blind Leper. He's a blues man who gives it up for the Lord in the House of Blues.
I give this film 5 halos.
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful
Format:DVD
First, let's get one thing out of the way: This is not a b-movie, it's a z-grade movie. We're talking about a self-financed picture starring a bunch of students at Ottawa's Carleton University made on a reported budget of $100, 000. That said, viewers weaned on safe and sound Hollywood fare of the silver screen will want to stay far, far away. People as myself who love trash cinema however will likely get a kick out of this, although this film is by no means a masterpiece of bad cinema.
A strange plague has overridden the city of Ottawa. Daylight-walking vampires have invaded the city, slaying many and causing a shortage of lesbians (don't ask...). Two priests then call to the chosen one, Jesus H himself, to restore order to the once peaceful Canadian capital. Jesus, using his magic powers of Kung-Fu, does the best he can but soon finds himself way outnumbered against the hordes of the undead. Down in the dumps, Jesus calls Mexican wrestler El Santos to the rescue. Together, Jesus Christ and El Santos form a Tag Team to rid the city of the undead.
The first thing one notices right away is how much fun everyone seems to be having making this movie. The film is filled with awkward acting and dialogue but the exuberance and joy of the people involved more than make up for that. It really looks like a film made by a bunch of friends with too much time on their hands. Most of the actors in this are either punk rockers (the people on Jesus' side) or Goths (the vampires). One of the priests who calls for Jesus' help has a red-couloured Mohawk and a leather jacket filled with spikes just to give you an idea. This film is somewhat of a musical but not the whole way through; it switches styles every 20 minutes or so.
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful
4.0 out of 5 stars Grab your friends and beer! Nov. 28 2003
By q
Format:DVD
I had an idea going into this movie that it was going to be terrible but likeable. I was wrong, it was terrible....but extremely likeable and definately funny (Don't miss God as a bowl of cherries & ice cream!). This story of Jesus and his modern day adventures does have some pacing issues, it moves like the tides...slow at times, but able to pick up just when it starts to get tedious. To get to the meat & bones, THIS IS NOT a movie for those who cannot appreciate low budget cult films or those who do not take the teachings of the church lightly. THIS IS for those of us who enjoy more than a little camp in our films, or for those drunken obscurists who along with a group of like minded friends can sit back and enjoy this movie for what it is....another chance to sit back and hang out with your goofy friends. Cheers to Lee Demarbe for totally offending my father by creating a movie that no one else would dare to make!
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful
1.0 out of 5 stars 90 minutes I'll never get back Oct. 20 2003
Format:DVD
For the love of mike, avoid this movie! I purchased it based on the review and in the belief that eveything is either funny/dumb, or dumb/funny. this movie was just BAD. This makes the Story of Ricky look like an oscar winner. The script was pretty bad, the acting is worse. The charachters have a problem conveying realistic emotion and either look like their reciting lines they've memorized, or they're so over the top, its stupid. It just wasnt good. I've tried giving away my copy to everyone I know, they watch it and give it back, blaming me for having poisoned them with this bad, bad movie. you could do so much better by watching paint age or grass grow. I'd rather get fat than watch this movie again. If I could have given it negative stars, I would have.
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Most recent customer reviews
4.0 out of 5 stars Freaking funny
A movie about Jesus teaming up with a Mexican wrestler to fight vampires that are harvesting lesbian's skin so they can walk around in the day light. Read more
Published 11 months ago by Jeff Wiggins
5.0 out of 5 stars Mary Magnum steals the show
Maria Moulton is the true star of this campy cult classic. Get this DVD, grab your friends, grab some beer and settle in for a good laugh. 15 stars! Go Mary Magnum!!!!!!
Published on Sept. 12 2004
5.0 out of 5 stars 5 stars is not enough!
What is wrong with you guys? 5 starts? I should be 12, one for every province in the best country in the world...Canada! Read more
Published on March 15 2004 by El Santos
1.0 out of 5 stars Depends on what you want it for
I really wish Amazon had a way to give two ratings to the same item. The one-star rating above is for the movie. Read more
Published on March 15 2004 by Matthew D. Hall
5.0 out of 5 stars Wow, this movie is so friggin awesome
I saw the title and thought boy this movie is gunna suck. It does! That's why it's so freakin awesome! Read more
Published on Dec 27 2003 by Rastaman
1.0 out of 5 stars Great premise, terrible excecution
When you hear the title, Jesus Christ: Vampire Hunter, you think Jesus Christ, in full linens, Hunting Vampires. Instead of this, I watched 90 minutes of pure crap! Read more
Published on Oct. 21 2003 by Toni E. Smith
5.0 out of 5 stars Sick fun humor!
Wow...this was incredible. Probably the WORST movie ever made, which makes it too damn funny! The title theme "Everybody Get Laid Tonight" sticks in your head, and all... Read more
Published on Sept. 14 2003 by Travis
5.0 out of 5 stars It's just... wow....
It's... wow. And then... wow. It's just... wow....
I'm really not sure how to describe this movie. It was really funny. Read more
Published on Aug. 18 2003 by M. Karapcik
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