Dadlands: The Alternative Handbook for New Fathers [Paperback]

"...truthful book written from the heart..." (Junior Pregnancy & Baby, February 06)

A baby has arrived. Now, your life is nothing but midnight feeds, crying, screaming and incontinence. And that’s just you.

But help is at hand with Dadlands. The author, a father of two, explores the secrets, hints, dodges and wheezes of being a first-time dad – and not having a nervous breakdown in the process.

Read up on the best way to swear in front of toddlers, the perplexing variety of baby meals (just who invented Chicken Tikka Masala for 8-month-olds?) and the secrets of Toy Decommissioning. Learn the best tips for getting out of children’s parties. See what happens if you call your child Chardonnay, and learn how to barge your way through a crowd with a pushchair. Find out why your kids need to come last in the egg-and-spoon race… and answer all those odd questions from non-parents who just don’t understand.

The ultimate antidote to all those worthy-but-dull parenting manuals, Dadlands finally tells it all like it is – the trials and tribulations of the first five years, from labour ward to Reception class.

This book won’t guarantee you’ll become a Superdad, but it ought to help you have a lot of fun trying. An ideal book for all new fathers, fathers-to-be and their long-suffering partners.

Dadlands

The Alternative Handbook for New Fathers

Daniel Blythe

So, you have become a proud new father. Now, your life is nothing but midnight feeds, crying, screaming and incontinence. And that’s just you.

Fatherhood is an unfair game. Just as you’re heading down the wing towards an open goal, somebody not only moves the goalposts but informs you that you should have been playing cricket. Then they tie your shoelaces together and knee you in a sensitive place.

But help is at hand with Dadlands, the guide that tells you what even other dads won’t. Learn the secrets, hints, dodges and wheezes of being a new dad and not having a nervous breakdown in the process.

Read up on the best way to swear in front of toddlers, the perplexing variety of baby meals and the secrets of Toy Decommissioning. Learn the best tips for getting out of childrens parties. See what happens if you call your child Chardonnay and learn how to barge your way through a crowd with a pushchair. Find out why your kids need to come last in the egg-and-spoon race and answer all those questions that you never thought to ask.

The ultimate antidote to all those worthy-but-dull parenting manuals, Dadlands finally tells it all like it is: the trials and tribulations of the first five years, from labour ward to Reception class. This book wont guarantee that youll become a Superdad, but it will help you have a lot of fun trying.

Dadlands is an ideal present for all new fathers and fathers-to-be and their long-suffering partners too.

Daniel Blythe was a lovely baby. He was born in Maidstone, Kent, just before the first Moon landing, but escaped to Yorkshire as soon as he got a passport. He is the author of seven books, including the acclaimed novels The Cut and Losing Faith and the bestselling Encyclopaedia Of Classic Eighties Pop. He lives on the edge of the Peak District, near Sheffield, with his wife and their two children whose exploits have been mercilessly logged in the name of research. He is hoping they will forgive him when they grow up.

Daniel Blythe was a lovely baby. He was born in Maidstone just before the first Moon landing, but escaped to Yorkshire as soon as he got a passport. He is the author of seven books, including the acclaimed novels The Cut and Losing Faith and the bestselling Encyclopaedia Of Classic Eighties Pop. He lives on the edge of the Peak District, near Sheffield, with his wife – and their two children, whose exploits have been mercilessly logged in the name of research. He is hoping they will forgive him when they grow up.