Don't Mind If I Do [Paperback]

What an enjoyable read! Unlike the all-too-typical angst-ridden star autobiography, George Hamilton (with collaborator William Stadiem) delivers the goods in the same breezy, self-effacing and irreverant tone that has kept his career afloat for nearly fifty years while most of his similarly pretty-faced contemporaries have long drifted out of public memory. Who cares if most people would be hard pressed to name three of his films? What a raconteur!

Impossible to know if this is the real Hamilton but this frequently LOL page-turner expertly maintains the sly persona (sort of a cross between Cary Grant. . . and Seventies-era Burt Reynolds, but with class) he has honed over the years, pulling no punches (yep, there's plenty of dirt--his take on working with Lana Turner is hilarious) yet without ever coming across as mean-spirited.

To avoid sounding like a shill reviewer from someone in the star's (or ghost writer's) camp, I will point out one major flaw: The book is too damn short!

I want to go out to lunch with this guy and hear about the stuff he doesn't even bother to mention. Hell, I'll even spring for the tanning butter!

I only bought George Hamilton's memoir, DON'T MIND IF IF I DO, because I had finished Tony Curtis' new memoir and I was shocked at how distasteful Tony seemed. I was curious, then, to compare his report with a report by one of his cohorts, though Hamilton is about 15 years younger than Curtis.

I knew next to nothing about George Hamilton when I started this book, other than that during those times I had seen him on television, he had appeared to be clever and charming, self-deprecating and funny. It turns out that Hamilton is all of these things and more.

Though he never complains, he has had a sad life, albeit in a very luxurious way. His mother was so involved in her own hedonistic pleasures that George and his brother David barely managed to get conventional educations; George never even graduated from high school.

Yet his mother connived to live in America's finest communities, including Beverly Hills, Beacon Hill in Boston, Beekman Place and Fifth Avenue in Manhattan and, most of all, Palm Beach. Being raised in these environments of privileged entitlement gave George an outlook that can only be termed exotic.

George sounds, amazingly, like a loving and unquestioning son. As soon as he was able, he took over the support of his mother and his older half-brother. He views his life with humor and his family with obvious affection, though he probably would have been better served to have hidden from them and not left a forwarding address.

Most of his life has been a series of near-misses, from his romance with Lynda Bird Johnson (which, even all of these years later, still strikes a chord of implausibility) to his single attempt at marriage. Yet he examines all of his adventures with acceptance and good humor.

This is not a typical Hollywood biography, in that it is not as peopled with movie stars as it might have been if he had had a larger career. At the same time, it is filled with folks with whom mere movie stars don't get to hobnob: English nobility, dethroned royalty, Arab gunrunners, Southern gentlemen, Mafia dons, everyday billionaires, leading American military men, Presidents (plural) and Senators, best-selling authors, society bandleaders, Asian dictators....

There is a whole other memoir in what George, ever the gentleman, chooses not to reveal. He doesn't kiss and tell, and he has kissed some very famous women. One can draw any conclusion one wishes.

All in all, George Hamilton has led quite a life.

The pacing of this book is not as tight as it could be and the flow of the narrative often is choppy. In the early pages, where his collaborator is first catching on to his rhythm, the tone is strained. George's father barely is mentioned after the details of his parents' divorce, other than for his death, and there is a brother who is mentioned even less. While there probably was a surfeit of material from which to choose, these faults lie with his co-writer, rather than with George.

George seems to be a man whose generosity of spirit and loving attitudes add up to a genuinely nice person--a genuinely nice person who has led a distinctive and fascinating existence. His story is well worth reading.

I approached George Hamilton's book "Don't Mind If I Do" with some trepidation. Whenever his name came up, it only invoked images of a glossy, golden, sun-baked man - not a real person at all.

In his autobiography, George tackles that part of his image honestly. In a chatty, friendly way, Mr. Hamilton shows the reader his past and what really happened. He does not deny the popular delusion of his spending half his waking hours basking on some beach. In fact, he readily admits to his sun-worshipping habits. No apologies, no explanations, he sets down the facts and doesn't apologize for them.

What does surprise me, more than his honesty, is the wealth of movies he did appear in and his association with the entertainment and political world. From Robert Evans to President Johnson's daughter, George Hamilton met (and partied) with them all. He talks of his successes (Love At First Bite) and his string of failures (The Happy Hooker Goes To Washington).

His relationships with the women in his life (and, although legion, he does not kiss-and-tell) is told. Surprisingly, he gives quite a brutal assessment of his family. His recollections on the life, and passing, of his brother are quite touching.

It all makes for a fast, and sometimes quite funny, read.

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