Erotic Mind [Paperback]

This is powerful, valuable stuff. Here's what makes it good:

1. I believe that Morin's landmark contribution is his "paradoxical perspective on eroticism." It challenges a variety of widely-accepted theories about attraction and great sex. As Morin states, "this new paradigm acknowledges and embraces the contradictory, dual-edged nature of erotic life. It recognizes that anything that inhibits arousal-including anxiety or guilt-can, under different circumstances, amplify it." The paradoxical view is at the heart of what makes this book special. It isn't just some scholarly, cerebral view, but rather a theory with profound experiential/practical significance. For instance, as one more fully experiences the profoundest subjective erotic rewards, one also experiences more strongly the tension between passion and fulfillment.

2. The book unearths readers' own sexual desires and sexual behaviors (or "Core Erotic Themes"), using unique self-assessment tools. Lots of people (including me) feel that this book really helps them see for the first time their sexual essence, which underlies their perplexing historical feelings and behaviors. Somehow, the revelations are more relieving than shocking. As you get to the bottom of what really turns you on within Morin's system, the world may look different! Of course, there's also great value in determining what makes your partner (or potential partner) click.

3. The book provides concrete tools for understanding and achieving peak eroticism ("emotional aphrodisiacs"). These include ways to increase sexual and orgasmic intensity, reduce inhibitions, improve validation received and given, and transcend personal boundaries. Additionally, it provides ways to address "troublesome turn-ons" which lead to destructive, repetitive behaviors.

4.Morin clarifies how to intensify desire and arousal in oneself and others. Much of the work is paradoxical, and explores eroticism in ways not available elsewhere. Moreover, it provides ways to evaluate sexual well-being from the "paradoxical" perspective ("signposts to erotic health")

5. It provides plenty revealing stories of peak sexual experiences. These stories improve understanding, but more importantly detoxify stigma, anxiety, guilt, anger and avoidance. Most people will find their doppelgangers here...

6. The author is a well established sex therapist, researcher, and psychotherapist.

If I have any criticism, it is that the book becomes repetetive in places. So what?

This book has helped me "unlock", reveal to myself and finally...to understand *why* I have behaved the way I have sexually, and why I have made so many of the other "non-sexual" choices I have made in my life (and I have been searching for these answers for most of my adult life).

His thoughtful approach to non self-judgemental exploration, and his practical and conscientous suggestions for overcoming (or accepting) the most vexing facets of your sexual being make for a book that to my knowledge, has no equal.

I can't believe there is anyone who wouldn't be transformed by careful reading of this book, and its value only increases when you are able to pass it on to someone you care about.

If your heart weighs heavy with the choices you have made, and you "question" why you desire the things, people and situations that you do...you must read this book.

This is one of 5 or 6 books I will never be without.