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3 of 4 people found the following review helpful
3.0 out of 5 stars
Simple and to the point, Feb 26 2008
I bought this book as an additional aid to a University class that I'm taking. The message of it is very simple, and likely things that people have always noted before. I don't think that it really took a Doctor to write it. Anyone that thinks, feels, and observes their mate, can figure this stuff out. That being said, some people are oblivious, or perhaps don't realize something until it's said and the light bulb goes off. People have different things that makes their heart tick. Each of us respond to love in different ways, and have different needs. The author boils seeing love displayed in five different ways, and when one identifies the language of love their mate speaks, then it will be easier to please them. For quite sometime I have been aware that I'm a "gift" person. I tend to give gifts to those I love, because I myself feel the most love from receiving them. Keep in mind this book is highly Bible based. Some references are very obvious, others are going to be known only by those familiar with the Bible. Some Biblical passages are discussed by the author through the words "an ancient sage once wrote." Nearly everything quoted, including C.S Lewis, is because of their spiritual content. However, even if you aren't one for believing in the Bible, the passages used are still of value since they display common sense.
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5.0 out of 5 stars
be careful when you read this - it will change your life!, Nov 2 2002
Whilst I am currently single, I have been on a search for a partner this year. In somewhat of a state of confusion in a 2-month relationship, I was recommended this book to help me understand the man I was dating. I was feeling that his "heart wasn't in it" & I couldn't work out how we could be in a relationship without emotional involvement. We both seemed to want the same things. When I suggested that to him, he was terribly hurt as he thought he was acting in a loving manner. After reading this book, I now know why. We were speaking different love languages & I wasn't receiving what he was sending. This book has changed the way I think about all of my relationships - intimate, family, friends, even flatmates! I recommend this book to everyone - those married recently, those single, those married for a long time, those with children - in fact, I can't imagine someone not getting something out of this book. The book is an easy & hugely beneficial read & will no doubt impact your life as much as it did mine. Enjoy reaping the benefits!
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5.0 out of 5 stars
Truly helpful if you say your mate never can understand you, Feb 28 2001
Dr. Chapman has cristalised his theory of the 5 love languages in a simple and easy-to-understand way. I started wondering why my husband didn't seem impressed with the fact that I am buying him ties and shirts. He wondered why I always wanted him to take the rubbish out. We read the book together and it solved our mysteries. My love language are words of affirmation, acts of service and receiving gifts and his are acts of service and physical touch. I had realised that he would be very upset if I didn't iron his shirts anymore or prepare him his breakfast bag to the office so he would get his bite in the morning. These meant more to him as acts of love than buying him things. And since then, we have always spoken in our 'love-tank' language: We ask each other 'How does your love tank look like today?' He surprised me with flowers when I got my job interview now that I am looking for employment. He would tell me more often now how much he appreciates a good meal cooked by me or the fact that I dress well for him. Sometimes it takes a big effort to do things you don't like to do but if it is the love language of your mate, you would love him or her enough to want to fill up that love tank. At times even if I don't feel like being intimate with my husband, I take the time to prepare myself and pamper him because I know this is his love language. We have since recommended the book to my sister-in-law. I am ordering a copy as a gift for her. I recommend this book to all couples, even if your relationship is doing very well, because it helps you to understand why your relationsip is doing so well!
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