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Getting Past Your Breakup: How to Turn a Devastating Loss into the Best Thing That Ever Happened to You [Paperback]

Susan J. Elliott
4.1 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (7 customer reviews)
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Book Description

May 5 2009

It's over--and it really hurts. But as unbelievable as it may seem when you are in the throes of heartache, you can move past your breakup. Forget about trying to win your ex back. Forget about losing yourself and trying to make this person love you. Forget it! Starting today, this breakup is the best time to change your life for the better, inside and out.

Getting Past Your Breakup is a proven roadmap for overcoming the painful end of any romantic relationship, even divorce. Through her workshops and popular blog, Susan Elliott has helped thousands of clients and readers transform their love lives. Now, she'll help you put your energy back where it belongs--on you. Her plan includes:

  • The rules of disengagement: how and why to go "no contact" with your ex
  • How to work through grief, move past fear, and take back your life
  • The secret to breaking the pattern of failed relationships
  • What to do when you can’t stop thinking about your ex, texting, calling, checking social networking sites, or driving by the house

Complete with inspiring stories from real people and strategies to jump-start the moving-on process, Getting Past Your Breakup is the most effective plan for getting permanently past a breakup, getting your confidence back, and opening yourself to true love.

Frequently Bought Together

Getting Past Your Breakup: How to Turn a Devastating Loss into the Best Thing That Ever Happened to You + It's Called a Breakup Because It's Broken: The Smart Girl's Break-Up Buddy
Price For Both: CDN$ 24.91

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Product Details

Product Description


Curled Up with a Good Book
“Elliott delivers the goods with a book that can help anyone get past a broken heart, and be stronger for it…The book provides solid, usable information told with compassionate understanding that really jumpstarts a heart that is on standby…The tools are priceless, and the inspiration to come out on top is what really makes this book stand out in the ocean of other self-help titles out there.”

ForeWord This Week, 4/22/09
“Each of the book's steps has been thoughtfully developed from the author's personal experience and her training and experience as a grief counselor.”

Bookviews, 6/09
“This book identifies the frequent mistakes people make during the early days of a breakup and explains how to avoid them. [Elliott] shows how to use the pain to grow, reassess your goals, and create a healthier life.”

Publisher’s Weekly, 6/8/09
“Provides sound advice for those still driving by the ex’s house or obsessed with self-blame.”
“Tell[s] people who have suffered relationship devastation how to get through the stages of grief associated with romantic implosion-and how to pick themselves up afterwards and come out of their distress better than they ever were before…Elliott’s comments on the stages of grief, although scarcely new, can be helpful to just about anyone who feels devastated by the end of an intimate relationship.”

Midwest Book Review, June 2009
“An effective book any general lending library will find popular.”

Midwest Book Review, June 2009
“A recommended read for those looking for more reasons to embrace better health.”, “Top Breakup Books,” 1/1/10
“An excellent breakup book that assists not only in dealing with the shock of a relationship ending, but also how to move past the breakup to become a stronger, better person in spite/because of it. Topics such as dealing with breakup myths (“I need closure!”) and boundaries (how do I not get into this situation ever again) are refreshing and well-suited to the tone and style. Highly recommended.”, 1/1/10
“A well thought out and surprisingly thorough book about dealing with a breakup…With chapters on learning new boundaries and how to tell the kids, Elliot has covered topics that most books of this genre ignore outright. Chapter 2, The Rules of Disengagement, are a must-read for anyone who has ever suffered a bad breakup, particularly the list of items that keep folks stuck in their grief—most notably the concept of needing closure after a failed relationship…Well written and thorough. Practical how-to’s in every chapter. Warm and friendly tone that never comes across as condescending or judgmental.”, “Top 5 Breakup Books of 2009,” 1/1/10
“This practical book offers useful tips about how to get through the depressing post-breakup stages of loneliness and desolation. If you can't afford a therapist, this useful tome will help you take charge of your life instead of giving way to grief.”

Midwest Book Review, August 2010
“What sets this book apart from other self help titles is the fact that the author has suffered the same type of heartache…If you are getting over a failed marriage, or a breakup of a relationship, then this is the must have book that will get you past your pain and suffering…[It] offers hope to those who are suffering. It will show you how to change a life altering experience into something that will change your life for the better.”
Kansas City Star, 9/29/10
“If you’re in recovery from a relationship that ended… read this book.”

“Bookworm Sez”
“From the devastation that comes at the end of a relationship, through the reeling, dealing and healing, Elliott worms her way around all aspects of a broken heart…Getting Past Your Breakup will help you see a crystal-bright future.”

About the Author

Susan J. Elliott JD, MEd is the creator of the Getting Past Your Past blog and seminar series. A motivational speaker, certified grief counselor, and attorney, and she lives with her husband and family in New York.


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Customer Reviews

4.1 out of 5 stars
4.1 out of 5 stars
Most helpful customer reviews
3 of 3 people found the following review helpful
I was a fan of Susan Elliott's blog during the time she was writing "Getting Past Your Breakup." From her blog, I know that Susan is highly educated and articulate, and that she gives excellent advice in an understanding but very no-nonsense fashion. Susan has impressive academic credentials related to the subject matter, as she was a practicing therapist and has advanced education in that field. What I found exceptionally helpful about both the book and the blog, though, is that Susan has lived through the process that she writes about in her book. After being raised in an abusive and dysfunctional family, Susan left her first marriage to an abusive husband, and was devastated by the break up. She then undertook a process of healing her emotional issues from her childhood and from the domestic abuse she'd experienced, while working through the loss of her first marriage. She learned how to create a happier, healthier life for herself and her children, and then went on to have a very healthy and happy second marriage. She also discusses how she went about making her dreams come true. The book teaches how to discover your dreams, set goals and work towards them in a systematic way, while also addressing any emotional issues that can hold you back from fulfilling your dreams.

This book is excellent for getting past a break up. Even if you haven't experienced childhood abuse or a dysfunctional family, this book is amazing and useful. But if you have, I would recommend it even more strongly, as it covers these additional topics that many break-up related books don't delve in to. This book and Susan's blog helped me so much, and I am quite confident it will be equally helpful to others.
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful
By Lisa
This book is a godsend for anyone who is stuck in the breakup period of a relationship. I went through a difficult divorce and was having tremendous difficulty moving on. This book was the tool that knocked some sense into me in a very practical, yet caring way. The author speaks about her own personal experience and offers great advice, step-by-step. If you are a divorced parent and need to maintain contact with your ex, this book will show you how. I had read a lot of self-help books out there, but nothing really hit home until I found this little gem. I wouldn't be where I am today (happy!) had I not found Susan and this terrific book.
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful
I think this is a very important book for those going through a breakup, and perhaps a book that just everyone should read! It helped me understand some of my feelings, and is helping me put a plan together and take control of my life instead of feeling like a victim. Section on healthy boundaries was a real eye opener for me. It's like having a personal life coach right in a book. The blog that goes along with the book keeps giving long after the book is read. Thanks to Susan for this, it made a huge difference for me.
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful
3.0 out of 5 stars Solid help book Aug. 16 2013
By R. Chiu
Format:Paperback|Verified Purchase
Concise instructions and help given to those that are going through a rough break up.

I really enjoyed this book as it gave you just the right amount of information on the emotions or thoughts you're going through paired with reasonable exercises on what you can do to heal yourself.
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