God Is a Woman: Dating Disasters [Paperback]

 

 

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That might be a better title for this book. Although I don't think it could have a better cover. The cover alone tells you it gets women and it's a smart book. Pick up books for guys almost always have some woman in a bikini on the front or just a close up on her backside, which is "covered" by a thong. The books are immediately insulting to women. Dating advice books for women do the same thing. They have something on the cover that turns off guys, like usually a dork picking his nose or something. The cover of this book is intriguing. It's kind of mysterious and I want to know. A prime example of the author illustrating his "be myterious, make her want to know more" ideology. I did want to know more. I laugh at the fridge because I know it's a guys, what with the gross towel and "grocery list," featuring "condoms" as the main course. Then of course there's the title. God is a woman? Tell me more! It's not offensive to women, it's intriguing.

The book opens with a brief explanation and then introduces the very funny concept that God is a woman and how the author knows it for sure. He pokes fun at both men and women and we are hooked. Very clever. Because in the very first two stories he lays on some of the most graphic descriptions in the book. But I don't mind because he's already got me laughing and feeling good. The descriptions just make things funnier and turn the heat up (and they're nothing like a steamy romance novel). The whole thing reminds me of getting picked up by a guy who's really good at it. It always goes like this:

The guy meets you, he flirts right away, lays on a few compliments, gets you laughing, you drink a little more, you laugh some more, the compliments and flirtation becomes more and more graphic. You know you should get away but you don't want to. You feel good and you're hooked. You wonder "How good can he really make me feel? Is he a good kisser? I like his mouth." By the time you're naked on his couch you think "How did I end up here? How did this whole thing get started?"

You're not offended as a woman by the graphic descriptions that pop up in this book because they pop up just like that; gradually, not abruptly like men's magazines. This author shows he knows what he'd doing, not just by telling us his experiences and advice but by laying the book out in the same format of his approach. It's INGENIOUS! And scary. He knows what we want and more importantly, when we want it. All women want sex. It's the TIMING of suggesting it and making moves that screws up most guys. It's the not perparing or setting the tone.

This author lives in Chicago, where he is getting a good buzz over the last few weeks, as he has been on the news a few times. I hope I don't run into him in a bar out here while I'm working on my consulting project... I could find myself on his sofa pretty easily, I think.

This book forces us to take a very honest look at ourselves and makes us laugh the entire journey.

Since the beginning of time women have wanted to know what goes on in men's minds. Well Ian Coburn gives it to us. Boy does he give it to us. "I wanted to take her top off and go to town on her breasts with my tongue." Yikes! No doubt some women will be offended by these types of graphic descriptions that occur in several places throughout the book, but I found it refreshingly honest and, in the spirit of honesty, somewhat arousing. I wanted to know and now I do. Having been a waitress and bartender throughout and right after college, I especially found his chapter on the hospitality industry and dating to be right on. We don't love you guys just because we bring you beer! Kudos to Ian for having the guts to tell it like it is, not just with the descriptive desires of his mind but also with very personal things, like graduating college still a virgin. I don't think many guys would admit to that. Mostly, Ian is honest with his hilarious, always disastrous escapades with women. It does indeed seem like God is a woman and she is against him. I laughed out loud throughout the entire book as I kept thinking "Oh no, please don't...don't...don't...oh, you idiot!" A remarkable thing happens to Ian, though. His disasters teach him things about women; which he succinctly reviews after each chapter. In a few years he goes from dating dud to dating stud. Actually, he becomes a complete jerk, getting laid at will and even hooking up with twins. Later he realizes it and corrects himself, finding that all important balance he recommends. The whole story of his growth is quite intriguing and as a woman I could see our role in creating this beast, with some of the games and frustrations we play on men.

There is lots of great insight in this book for both men and women. Ian talks about why men like younger women - not because of their younger looks but because they are more lively and less skeptical than older women, many of whom have wasted years trying to force one boyfriend be who they want him to be instead of just accepting that he isn't that guy and moving on to find the right one; he tells younger women to avoid that and older women to be more lively and less skeptical, so that they will be approachable to guys. That women are not good communicators (that I felt was not true until I read his explanation - women are in touch with their emotions and know what's bothering them, but they don't communicate it well, oftentimes just yelling, "If you don't know what's bothering me, I'm not going to tell you!" three weeks after it bothers us. Men communicate well, they just don't know what their feelings are a lot or what is bothering them. That actually is very true.) 'It's a woman's perrogative to change her mind' really means women don't want to be accountable for a decision in the first place. It goes on and on, literally full of advice, all woven into these hilarious stories. It is a must-read, hands down. Just be ready for some graphic details. I look forward to reading Ian's advice for women on Lifetime's website, where he starts giving advice as an expert to women in June.

[...]Here is the review -

This book shocked me with its great advice for women. It really has a different angle and logically explains why much of what women do to get the right guy doesn't work. I bought it because I was stuck in an airport due to snow and needed something to read. It was by a comedian, so I expected it to be funny, but, even though it said it had good advice for men and women, I didn't think it would have any for women. I was very wrong.

This book works on every level. The storytelling is intriguing and hilarious. We empathize with Ian as he goes from nice to guy to frustrated guy to cool guy to outright jerk to cool guy, again. He shares with us - some times offensive with vividness - his thoughts and actions, and how those thoughts and actions humorously resulted in him screwing up everything with some woman. But he learns several things from each story, highlights them, then puts them to use in another story, getting a little further to figuring we women out along the way, until we are putty in his hand and he wakes up one day to realize that he is abusing the putty.

For guys or girls, this is a must-read. Period. For men, Ian teaches you how to flirt and why it's important, how to develop a sense of humor and confidence, what "being mysterious" to women really means, and on and on. For women, he offers advice both by putting us in his head and by giving it straight out, without holding punches. Like I said, it does get graphic in places, but that just makes the stories funnier and the book more honest. It's not as bad as most PG-13 movies these days or anything like a CSI episode, and none of it is violent.

Ian offers women advice by writing things like, "Your friends' opinions should never carry more weight than your own." I think a lot of women let their friends' opinions dictate much of what they do, even more so than their own opinion does. "Many women mistake what they wish they wanted with what they want, which screws them up a lot." How many times have you said you wanted a smart, nice guy but keep falling for dumb jerks? He goes on to talk about ways to break this habit. "Women forget their audience when going out to meet men. Much of what they do and wear is to stay in the favor of other women, not for men." He tells about how he's often heard women out at a bar, upset some girl is talking to a guy they want to talk to, say things like, "I can't believe he's talking to her. I mean, look at those shoes." "No guy, ever in the history of humankind, has ever said, 'Wow, look at her. She's beautiful. She has a great rack, sweet smile, she's pretty, seems conversational and laughs a lot. Too bad about those shoes. Shall we head some place else, guys?" "Remember your audience is men, not women," Ian advises. He says the best thing a woman could wear to meet a good guy to date is tight jeans, a fitting top, and a smile. After reading that I realized that almost all my married friends and I met our husbands while we were looking what we thought was our worse, like tight jeans and a t-shirt! He has all sorts of good advice like this.

I can't say enough good things about this book. It has it all. Great advice, funny stories, and is a quick, easy read. No psychological mumbo-jumbo to sift thru. [...].

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5.0 out of 5 stars Awesome book!
I found out about this book from a review of another book on dating I was thinking of buying. Man am I glad I bought this book instead. Read more

Published 18 months ago by Mixam

5.0 out of 5 stars Doesn't Insult Women And Is Hilarious!
I've been following this author since I read the book because his advice is so good and charismatic. What's amazing is that he appeals to both men and women. Read more

Published on Aug 10 2007 by Julianne Stewart

5.0 out of 5 stars Makes No Sacrifices
The stories in are hilarious; this is the funniest book I have ever read. This is the best book in the genre of sex and dating advice. Read more

Published on Jun 28 2007 by Metal Mouth

5.0 out of 5 stars I HIGHLY RECOMMEND THIS BOOK!!
Very well written book!! This book gives great advice, presented in a way that cannot be found anywhere else; from a person who experienced many rejections and had the guts to... Read more

Published on Jun 19 2007 by Edward J. B. Roco

5.0 out of 5 stars A Big, Big Fan
I was one of the first people to read this book and comment on it on Amazon.com when it first came out. I have been spreading the word where ever I can. Read more

Published on May 12 2007 by Marco Polo

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