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Honey, I Wrecked the Kids: When Yelling, Screaming, Threats, Bribes, Time-outs, Sticker Charts and Removing Privileges All Don't Work [Paperback]

Alyson Schafer
4.6 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (14 customer reviews)

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Book Description

Jan. 23 2009
More life-saving parenting advice from the bestselling author of Breaking the Good Mom Myth

Bringing the same perceptive and actionable advice that made Breaking the Good Mom Myth an international bestseller, TV host and psychotherapist Alyson Schafer again comes to the rescue of desperate parents everywhere. For those who've tried just about everything to discipline their kids, Honey, I Wrecked the Kids explains why children today really are resistant to traditional parenting methods and how only a new model for winning cooperation really works. Full of real-life examples, the book gives parents a deeper understanding of misbehavior and their role in it, shies away from traditional behavioral models of parenting, and offers humane, good-humored advice that will make parenting a manageable and, finally, rewarding task.

Alyson Schafer (Toronto, ON) is the host of The Parenting Show and a media expert on parenting. She has appeared on The Montel Williams Show and been featured in Cosmopolitan, Parenting, Reader's Digest, and more.

Product Details

Product Description

From the Back Cover



If you have a "discipline-resistant" child, then you already know that the old standby parenting tactics just don't work on this modern era kid. Naughty mats, counting, time-outs, removing privileges…all the things that seemed to work just fine on other kids are actually making things worse with this one.

"Sometime between removing the door to stop him from slamming it and pushing his shelf into the hall so he couldn't chuck storybooks at me when I sent him to his room, I thought to myself−this is crazy. We can't go on forever disassembling the house. I need help!"

—Shirley, mother of two

Psychotherapist, bestselling author and nationally sought-after parenting expert Alyson Schaefer finally provides what perplexed parents everywhere have been waiting for: the blueprint to understanding−and correcting−misbehavior. This isn't an assertiveness course for permissive parenting, and it's not a PR makeover for our autocratic, punishing methods. With her characteristic blend of outrageous humor and uncanny insight (yes, she does peer into your living rooms at night), Alyson will show you how to diagnose and reverse the root cause of all misbehavior (even the most baffling) so that you can rediscover the joy of parenting your kids. Sound too good to be true? Start reading.

About the Author

Alyson Schafer, M.A. Counseling, B.Sc., OACCPP

Alyson Schafer is a psychotherapist and one of the nation's leading parenting experts. She's the author of the bestselling Breaking the Good Mom Myth (Wiley, 2006) and host of The Parenting Show. The media relies on Alyson's comments and opinions; she has appeared on The Montel Williams Show, The National, BTV, and you can find her interviewed and quoted extensively in countless publications including Today's Parent, Cosmopolitan, Reader's Digest and Chatelaine.

Visit her online at www.alyson.ca

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Customer Reviews

4.6 out of 5 stars
4.6 out of 5 stars
Most helpful customer reviews
4 of 4 people found the following review helpful
Format:Paperback|Verified Purchase
I bought this book to try to learn new skills on how to deal with professional adults who misbehave in the work place. The same skills talked about in the book can be used on any person of any age.
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4.0 out of 5 stars It has helped me manage my toddler Dec 4 2013
By Charity
Format:Paperback|Verified Purchase
I was helpless as my first boy starts to give me tantrums and my usual way of what I remember how my parents disciplined me doesn't seem to work. After reading this book halfway and started applying some of the principles, I start to have some sense and understanding of what he needs and what I need to do to to work together. There are still moments where I don't know what to do but it has definitely helped me manage my toddler.
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5.0 out of 5 stars Practical, useful and easy to read & implement! Nov. 5 2013
Format:Kindle Edition|Verified Purchase
It is changing the way my family operates! We are seeing change already! I love it. I finished it about a 2 weeks ago but I keep going back to my notes- almost everyday! My husband is reading it now. I have recommended it to many of my friends!
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9 of 10 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars A must read if your children are driving you crazy! March 23 2009
By Kim S
I am a huge fan of Alyson Schafer. I had called into her show on Rogers TV a couple of times and both times received advice that seemed so easy to follow and advice that you would hear nowhere else, and you know what? ...it always worked! I loved her book "Breaking the Good Mom Myth," but wanted more. "Honey, I Wrecked the Kids" provided just that. It outlines and provides great examples of her approach to parenting, which is helping to empower our children and become co-operative people in our homes and society. I watched an episode of "Supernanny," which I would normally find informative ... but after reading this book I was horrified, "Supernanny" has nothing on Alyson's techniques! Alyson's techniques require a shift in the way we view and treat our children, some techniques can be used right away and some may take more time ... But the advice is comparable to none. A must read for anyone dealing with children bouncing off the walls and wreaking havoc in your home! Like mine ... were!
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars The kind of parent I want to be June 14 2009
I loved Breaking the Good Mom Myth: Every Mom's Modern Guide to Getting Past Perfection, Regaining Sanity, and Raising Great Kids, and I've read all of the Dreikurs books but this book really internalized all the information for me. It not only helped me to understand the motivation and challenges my children are working with but it also helped me combat some of my own demons. I am confident that reading this book has brought me closer to becoming the parent I want to be. Thanks Alyson!
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3 of 4 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Great Parenting Resource! Feb. 26 2009
Fantastic! This witty and down-to-earth book delivers practical and effective strategies for any parent struggling with discipline. Alyson goes beyond the quick-fix approach to stopping unwanted behaviour. She guides us through numerous easy-to-relate-to examples to help us understand the root causes of `mis'behaviour. Once the causes are identified, we are offered strategies that are appropriate in gaining cooperation from children in mutually respectful ways. Personally, I know this book will be an invaluable resource to me, both as a parent and in my career as a psychotherapist.
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5.0 out of 5 stars Highly recommended! July 25 2011
A mommy-friend recommended this book to me, and I was initially quite resistant. I ordered it from the library first, and was so taken with the whole approach that I promptly ordered it from Amazon so I'd have a copy to keep. This is a great book for the frustrated parent or tired parent or at-wits-end parent, or even the parent who just wants a few more communication tools up his/her sleeve.

Both this book and the follow-up "Ain't Misbehavin'" are so empowering in that they give positive ideas on ways to respond to children's behaviours when nothing else seems to work. I find the suggestions help me to feel more capable, more calm, and more in control of myself when my toddlers are not cooperating, and the positive effects on their behaviour are so powerful. I have a degree in psychology and find the psychology behind the approach particularly intriguing, but this book is written for all parents. It's a bit "cutsy" and overly-casual in the language at times, but it's a book I'll refer to again and again.
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Most recent customer reviews
5.0 out of 5 stars The user's guide for Parents with kids of every age and at every...
I have had the distinct pleasure of hearing Alyson speak on more than one occassion and I am pleased to say that she's real, she's brilliant and when it comes to raising kids... Read more
Published on Dec 2 2010 by Amaya Mocha
5.0 out of 5 stars Amazing
Saw Alyson when she visited London Ontario and HAD to buy the book. I have 3 daughters close in age with different personalities and came to realize that they all need to be... Read more
Published on May 31 2010 by M. Hughes
5.0 out of 5 stars Don't be put off by the title!
I'm also a HUGE fan of Alyson's parenting approach (as anyone who knows me will attest).

Love the content of the book. Read more
Published on July 7 2009 by A. Browne
4.0 out of 5 stars Great Book!
I am a fan of Alyson's parenting approach to start with but, this is a good read that is full of intelligent perspectives on how to understand why behaviours are happening with... Read more
Published on April 28 2009 by HR
5.0 out of 5 stars well worth it
This book is well worth the read because of its fresh and inspiring perspective. Understanding what motivates misbehaviour can give parents more patience and respect for a child's... Read more
Published on April 26 2009 by C. R. Mcalister
2.0 out of 5 stars Honey, She Wrecked This Book
This book is relentlessly cutsie and full of tedious "aw-shucks" writing. It reads like unedited material. It's a jumbled mass of mixed-up and hastily thrown together ideas. Read more
Published on April 13 2009 by Vancouver reader
5.0 out of 5 stars So logical
I'm a huge fan of Alyson's work. This second book builds on many of the topics from her first book. Alyson is just so logical and practical. I love her approach. Read more
Published on March 9 2009 by Tamara Darchiville
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