"Depression fallout" is the emotional upheaval suffered by the friends and family members of someone who's depressed. Because at any given time, 17 million Americans are suffering from depression, there's a huge number of people suffering from this, says author Anne Sheffield, the daughter of a depressive. She compassionately recalls situations discussed in her support group at New York City's esteemed Beth Israel Hospital to illustrate how "co-sufferers" can successfully cope with their grief, confusion, guilt, and reduced self-esteem.
One of the most overlooked yet thoroughly damaged lots of depression fallout victims, she says, are the toddlers and children of depressed mothers. Children with behavioral problems at home and in school may be struggling for attention they don't get from a depressed parent. She writes, "Although a depressed parent of either sex creates problems for a child, the bulk of the research on parental depression and its effects on young children has zeroed in on the mother, because she is the center of a young child's existence: the primary nurturer, teacher, and emotional and social contact. Ideally, a mother is a good listener, communicator, and problem solver; authoritative without being authoritarian; warm and consistent; and tolerant and patient. Mothers in the grip of depression are often just the opposite: harsh, critical, impatient, irritable, and unaffectionate. And because one in every four women will suffer serious depression at some time in her life--more often than not, right in the middle of her prime childbearing years of twenty-five to thirty-five--the research findings are applicable to a very substantial number of children."
Without being flippant, Sheffield inserts bits of humor into the book. She describes what she calls "sticky-flypaper depressives" as those who blame themselves for everything and anything that has ever gone wrong, whether it be a relationship, or, as one psychiatrist recalled from one patient's session, "the bad Broadway season of 1947." She also gives a thorough analysis of the many causes of depression, illustrates the five stages of depression fallout, and considers the benefits and downfalls of psychotherapy and how a fallout victim may be affected by it. Sheffield offers reassuring advice on how fallout victims can defuse stress and rebuild their self-esteem and social lives, abundant resources and references for support groups and informational organizations, and an extensive list of medications commonly used for the treatment of mental disorders. No matter what the age or relationship of the fallout victim, How You Can Survive When They're Depressed will prove to be a much-needed dose of sympathy. --This text refers to the Hardcover edition.
"Anne Sheffield has guided me to fresh recognitions of myself . . . I wish we'd had this book decades ago."
I've learnt so much about depression from this book. Coping strategies, what medications are available and how they work, and their side-effects, and most importantly that I'm not... Read morePublished on Feb. 11 2004 by L. KEMP
I have been re-reading Anne's book:"How To Survive When They're Depressed",it is wonderful. Read morePublished on Jan. 25 2004 by Marc Bernstein
After living with a depressed partner for 3 years, I was at my wits' end about the lethargy, the crying, the emotional distancing. Read morePublished on Jan. 21 2004 by LMo
I bought this boyfreind for the man I will be marrying; to help him understand his role in my clinical depression. This book is AWFUL. Read morePublished on March 9 2003 by Aimee
This book leaves alot to be desired!! There is little or nothing to help sons or brothers of depressed sisters and mothers!! Read morePublished on Dec 15 2002 by Marc Bernstein
The author has an obvious slant for using medication as a quick solution. Supporting the pharmaceutical industry for a life time and giving up sex is not what I call healing. Read morePublished on March 25 2002
Anne lays out in strightforward terms a plan for how to stand your ground and get the peace of mind for yourself and help for your loved one. Read morePublished on Sept. 23 2001
As the mother of a depressed adult woman, I've read several books in an attempt to understand what SHE is dealing with, and how it is affecting the rest of the family. Read morePublished on July 11 2001
I am presently going through a divorce from a depressive. Anne Sheffield's book has been a godsend for me. Read morePublished on June 26 2001