Living Deliberately [Paperback]

Reading LIVING DELIBERATELY by Hrvoje Butkovic leaves one with the feeling that here is a man who is on a perpetual journey for a meaningful life of joy and satisfaction - and his manner of writing is so encouraging that we want to take that journey with him. He is uniquely gifted - born in Croatia, then living in Yugoslavia until the brink of the civil war there, and now living in Johannesburg, South Africa - he has observed all manner of people and influences and customs and has developed a following that most assuredly will be advanced by the reading of this book.

Butkovic defines `deliberate living' as `living life in such a way that the protagonist is aware of shat she is thinking, saying, doing, understands why she is thinking, saying, or doing it, and approves off it being thought, said, or done, for every though, word, and action of consequence.' Note, immediately that the author substitutes the pronoun `she' for the usual `he' - a slight but meaningful way of suggesting that we look at his words in a refreshed manner. This is more than the usual self-help book or book on ancient philosophy (especially Eastern) or mystical book. In a manner of speaking it is all of these but filtered through a more direct and entirely introspective and personal method of perception of who we are, why we are that way, and then choosing if we want to support that way or alter it. `The concrete approach that is taken to accomplish this can be summarized as an attempt to answer the question "Who am I?" in experiential terms. In other words, to fashion one's life into a self-definition by means of stringing together a series of authentic experiences. The book is broken down into three parts. The first part defines the key concepts that pertain to deliberate living. The second part describes the process that can be followed in an attempt to achieve it. The third part lists the effects that this is likely to have on one's life - the challenges of doing so, the rewards of succeeding at it, and the likely reception among the people who don't hold this approach to living in a similarly high regard.'

As Butkovic states `a life journey that has to final destination, but where each step that we take is its own reward, one that makes the whole journey well worth taking' is the goal of deliberate living. If we assume complete responsibility for who we are, work thorough understanding who we are and then nurture who we are places the authority of our being within our own hands. Butkovic takes us through the various stages of his concepts of training us to live deliberately by offering sage advice and then, as any good teacher, ends each brief chapter with a summary or series of questions to test our level of assuming control. It is powerful, enlightening, enriching and fulfilling - especially when Butkovic reminds us that we will never be complete in our journey, offering his own status as proof.

Impressed by this book lead this reader to some research on this very sensitive writer and found that he is also a social activist. A quote form his site: `Having followed the work of some of the people who are disillusioned with the present-day society and contemplate a better future, and having observed and/or participated in some of the initiatives that are aimed at positive social change, I've come to realize that many people are finding it difficult to picture how such a future might work, and even more difficult to envisage how we might create it. It occurred to me that it would help the situation if we could find a way to leverage all of these initiatives so that the role that each one can play in bringing about the desired change is well understood. To this end, I have tried to put together a comprehensive plan of action whereby such a change could be achieved, trying to account for all the prerequisites and drawing on all the initiatives that I'm aware of. In so doing, I haven't necessarily adopted them in their entirety, but only taken the parts that could contribute to the overall transformation as I see it, without clashing with other initiatives. The purpose of the plan of action is to create a utopian society. That is, the best society that we can imagine. Because different people imagine different things and what we imagine changes over time, this vision is neither singular nor static. I have adopted as goals those aspects of our vision that I consider to be universal - goals like freedom, harmony and prosperity - while trying to allow for multiple ways of reaching them. The plan of action is subjective in nature. It is really nothing more than my opinion, and shouldn't be taken to amount to more than this. It is offered in the hope that you find it useful; that it makes social transformation appear more tangible and that it stimulates participation in various activities that can help bring it about. Hrvoje Butkovic is obviously an enlightened thinker and one who seems destined to have an influence on every mind he touches. Read and absorb him. The journey is incredible. Grady Harp, July 12

This book is delightful! Had I come across it years ago, it would have saved me significant trouble in my life. Beyond Butkovic's eloquence, I see this book as a tapestry that weaves all the elements of self-help, religion and philosophy into one volume. Yet without the negative aspects of any of them. His introduction highlights the issues with all three of these paths so precisely that it staggered me.

I think the best approach is to also use this as a workbook. There are questions throughout the text just for this purpose. It's easy to believe you don't have to do them. But I actually sat down and gave it a shot. I truly peeled back some layers that I'd had difficulty confronting. So I can vouch for their authenticity.

Overall, Butkovic offers cohesive thought and sound solutions for people searching for a no-nonsense approach to life. I think it's refreshing to read a book about realistically taking charge of your life while still keeping their feet solidly on logical ground. This is a simple, yet effective plan for change. As such, I recommend this book highly to anyone that has been dissatisfied with other approaches.

I found the philosophy and psychology in Living Deliberately to be absorbing, enlightening, and quite interesting. This methodical and instructive book can be read over and over again, and each time you pick it up, there's always something new to digest. I enjoyed the words of wisdom that abound in almost every page, with plenty of real life examples to go by.

According to the author, living deliberately is a way of life, and this begins by taking responsibility for one's actions. Throughout the book, one explores the recurring theme of finding out and knowing who you are. That includes asking questions, like "Who am I?"

In one particular section, the author discusses multitasking and how it is conducive to forming habits:

"When having tea with a friend, it makes sense that we should give the conversation our undivided attention. The significance of drinking tea pales in comparison. In this instance, drinking tea is a suitable background activity. This isn't a problem the first time it happens. However, as we participate in this activity and others like it, we form a habit. The habit tells us that drinking tea is a suitable background activity, not just in a particular instance, but every time....Because we have learned not to value them, we approach them with the goal of getting them out of the way as quickly as possible..."

I believe that this can apply to family as well. For example, if one is busy working on the computer or cooking dinner, and their spouse or child approaches them, do they give them their undivided attention, or do they put the meal first and their spouse and child second? Can you see where this is going? It can become a habit, and if you're always too busy to give them your full attention, then you aren't living in the moment and truly experiencing them.

Other topics the author delves into are experiencing pain, identifying the consequences of our conduct, dealing with failure, and understanding our belief system. Also, at the end of the chapters, he asks pertinent and thought-provoking questions. Towards the end of the book, there are flow charts that aid visually in the path of deliberate living.

The author ends the book by suggesting that each one of us not settle for the society we live in, but start changing it. He has formed a website for like-minded people along that line.

The only thing this book did not have, was spiritual enlightenment. Given that the author mentions that he was influenced by the book Conversations with God, I expected some reference to a higher power, a God, an unseen force, being within us along this path of life. That was not the case. However, there is valuable advice for readers who are counselors and people searching for a better way of life.