From Publishers Weekly
In 1986, when the author was 10, her father was stabbed while sleeping next to his third wife; his murder remains unsolved. After years of pretending the memories of that night haven't affected her, and about to get married and enter a new phase of life, Howard sets out to untangle what she and her family can recall of her father's life and death. This book is not an attempt at vengeance but rather a profoundly personal account of a California Central Valley childhood defined by chaotic family life. Howard's parents divorced when she was very young, and both subsequently remarried, with Howard repeatedly pulled into new versions of "family" that replaced—but never explained the demise of—the old ones. It's a testament to her strength that she was finally able to extract herself from this turmoil and make a life of her own (she now writes for the
San Francisco Chronicle). Howard's desire to understand her past (particularly the murder) will leave readers sympathetic and understanding of the story's sometimes wandering nature. This is a poignant account of the lifelong effects violence and tragedy can have on an individual and a family.
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From Booklist
The death of a parent is a pivotal event in any child's life, no matter how old he or she is when it occurs; but for 10-year-old Rachel, her father's murder in the bedroom of their tiny Merced, California, home became the moment that would define the rest of her life. Stan Howard may have been the quintessential small-town "Good Time Charlie" of the 1980s, a mullet-haired, party-hardy, womanizing Rod Stewart aficionado, but who would stab him to death as he lay sleeping next to his third wife became a mystery that remains unsolved to this day. Perpetually haunted by his death, emotionally scarred by the unstable home life she experienced in its aftermath, Rachel endured years of self-destructive behavior and suicidal depression before finally gaining the strength to confront the painful, if not always accurate, memories of the night when her world changed forever. The result is an abundantly candid and dramatically riveting account of one young woman's courageous determination to understand the unfathomable.
Carol HaggasCopyright © American Library Association. All rights reserved
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