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Make Love the Bruce Campbell Way [Paperback]

Bruce Campbell
4.8 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (6 customer reviews)
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Book Description

Aug. 22 2006
"This approach generates some of the most witty showbiz lunacy since This Is Spinal Tap."
---Sacramento News & Review
 
What you're reading right now is known as the "flap copy." This is where the 72,444 words of my latest book are cooked down to fit this space.  But how does one do that? Do you reveal pivotal plot points like the one at the end of the book where the little girl on crutches points an accusing finger and shouts, "The killer is Mr. Potter"?
I have too much respect for you as an attention-deficient consumer to attempt such an obvious ruse. But let's not play games here. You picked up the book already, so you either:
A.  Know who I am
B.   Liked the cool smoking jacket I'm wearing on the cover
C.   Have just discovered that the bookstore restroom is out of toilet paper 
Is it a sequel to my autobiography If Chins Could Kill: Confessions of a B Movie Actor?  Sadly, no, which made it much harder to write. According to my publisher, I haven't "done" enough since 2001 to warrant another memoir.
Is it an "autobiographical novel"? Yes. I'm the lead character in the story, and I'm a real person, and everything in the book actually happened, except for the stuff that didn't.
The action revolves around my preparations for a pivotal role in the A-list relationship film Let's Make Love!  But my Homeric attempt to break through the glass ceiling of B-grade genre fare is hampered by a vengeful studio executive and a production that becomes infected by something called the "B movie virus," symptoms of which include excessive use of cheesy special effects, slapstick, and projectile vomiting.
From a violent fistfight with a Buddhist to a life-altering stint in federal prison, this novel has it all. And if the 72,444 words are too time-consuming, there are lots and lots of cool graphics.
Regards,
Bruce "Don't Call Me Ash" Campbell
 
Praise for Make Love the Bruce Campbell Way
 
"It's a great, goofy what-if."
---Entertainment Weekly
 
"Ultimately, Make Love is a Bruce Campbell novel, starring Bruce Campbell, written for Bruce Campbell fans for whom Bruce Campbell can do no wrong. They'll no doubt find Campbell's latest endeavor nothing short of---to quote one of his most famous characters---groovy."
---The Onion
 
"One of the most delightfully deranged experiences you'll have reading this year.  Hail to the king, baby."
---Rue Morgue
 
 

Frequently Bought Together

Make Love the Bruce Campbell Way + If Chins Could Kill: Confessions of a B Movie Actor + Jack of All Trades: The Complete Series
Price For All Three: CDN$ 54.66


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Product Description

From Publishers Weekly

Satire and sharp one-liners are the engines powering low-budget movie hero Campbell's (If Chins Could Kill) first autobiographical novel, a funny, breezy, high-camp affair. After dispensing B-movie witticisms on romance and navigating love scenes, Sci-Fi channel schlock film actor "Bruce Campbell" is unexpectedly offered the A-list role of a "wise-cracking doorman" and "emotional lynchpin" in the new Mike Nichols romantic comedy Let's Make Love, starring Richard Gere and Renee Zellweger. After getting fully immersed in calamitous role research at the Waldorf-Astoria, Campbell postures (and annoys) his way through the first read-through with indifferent cast members, runs lines with a timid Gere, crassly advises Zellweger on how to accentuate her bust line, dishes ex-husbands with Liz Taylor and berates the film's director of photography, Oscar-winning Vilmos Zsigmond (whose name Campbell spells Sigmund). After a Secret Service ambush and more movie set mayhem, Campbell's A-List luck finally runs out. But not even a bumbling S.W.A.T. team can stop this determined day player from getting his due. Campbell knows of what he writes, and this endless barrage of extreme silliness obviously spoofs (and quite possibly mirrors) a frenzied acting career made up of equal parts exasperation and hilarity.
Copyright © Reed Business Information, a division of Reed Elsevier Inc. All rights reserved. --This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.

From the Inside Flap

What you’re reading right now is known as the “flap copy.” This is where the 72,444 words of my latest book, Make Love the Bruce Campbell Way, are cooked down to fit in a 3 ½-by-9 ½-inch column. But how does one do that with a fictional story about a B movie actor’s disastrous attempt to finally star in a big-budget Hollywood movie? Do you tantalize readers with snappy zingers like the one in chapter six where Biff the Wonder Boy says, “You may be bred in ol’ Kentucky, but you’re only a crumb up here”? Or do you reveal pivotal plot points like the one at the end of the book where the little girl on crutches points an accusing finger and shouts, “The killer is Mr. Potter!”

I have too much respect for you as an attention-deficient consumer to attempt such an obvious ruse. But let’s not play games here. You’ve already picked up the book, so you either:

A. Know who I am

B. Like the cool smoking jacket I’m wearing on the cover

C. Have just discovered that the bookstore restroom is out of toilet paper

Is this a relationship book? Well, if by “relationship book” you mean that the characters in it have relationships or are related to someone, then yes, absolutely. Will you learn how to pick up chicks? Good heavens, I can only hope so, though for best results in that department you should both read this book and be Brad Pitt.

Is it a sequel to my autobiography, If Chins Could Kill: Confessions of a B Movie Actor? Sadly, no, which made it much harder to write. According to my publisher, I haven’t “done” enough since 2001 to warrant another memoir.

Is it an “autobiographical novel”? Yes. I’m the lead character in the story and I’m a real person and everything in the book actually happened, except for all the stuff that didn’t.

Mostly, the action revolves around my preparations for a pivotal role in director Mike Nichols’s A-list relationship film Let’s Make Love!, starring Richard Gere, Renée Zellweger, and Christopher Plummer. This is the kind of break most actors can only dream of. But my Homeric attempt to break through the glass ceiling of B-grade genre fare is hampered by a vengeful studio executive and a production that becomes infected by something called the “B movie virus,” symptoms of which include excessive use of cheesy special effects, slapstick, and projectile vomiting.

When someone fingers me as the guy responsible for the virus, thus ruining my good standing in the entertainment industry (hey, I said it was fiction, okay?), I become a fugitive racing against the clock, an innocent patsy battling the shadowy forces of the studio system to clear my name, save my career, and destroy the Death Star. In a jaw-dropping twist worthy of Hitchcock (page 274), you’ll gasp as I turn the tables on Hollywood and attempt to salvage my reputation in a town where you’re only as good as your last remake.

From a violent fistfight with a Buddhist to a life-altering stint in federal prison, this novel has it all. If you like John Grisham, Tom Clancy, or one too many run-on sentences, you’ll absolutely love Make Love the Bruce Campbell Way. And if the 72,444 words are too time-consuming, there are lots and lots of cool graphics.

Regards,

Bruce “Don’t Call Me Ash” Campbell

~

Bruce Campbell’s first book, If Chins Could Kill, was a major sleeper hit
and became a New York Times and national bestseller. His immense energy and
sharp wit are in evidence again in Make Love the Bruce Campbell Way, a novel that will
have readers laughing out loud.

--This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.

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Most helpful customer reviews
1 of 1 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Not just for Campbell fans Aug. 19 2008
Format:Paperback
When I first picked up this book, I was more than a little hesitant about it. I loved "Chins" but really what more could there be? I try not to read covers and its funny that nowhere in the book does it say that its actually fiction.

I bought into it for the first few chapters, laughing at human stupidity...yet when I realised that its actually fiction, I went back and laughed out loud at Campbell's comedic wit.

This is a truly great work of comedy and as I re-read the book, I can't help but wonder why Campbell doesn't have any comedy scripts to his name.

Bruce Campbell has been underestimated as an actor, and now obviously is being underestimated as a writer.
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Groovy Feb. 14 2013
Format:Kindle Edition
Great book. However many spelling and other weird errors that I think happened when the conversion to digital was done. I can't imagine this many errors got past the editors.
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5.0 out of 5 stars A LIFE WELL TRAVELED Aug. 4 2005
Format:Hardcover
I have to say that "MAKE LOVE THE BRUCE CAMPBELL WAY" is the best entertainment book I have personally read since "MY FRACTURED LIFE" purely because it doesn't follow the paint by numbers philosophy of "how I became a star and why you should love me" writing that many show biz books take. Bruce Campbell has crafted an actual entertaining book that could be about any star's life, it just happens to be a fictional account of his own. It takes the luster off his stardom and ironically propels him further onto a pedestal in my eyes as a result.
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