Wait, it's not what it looks like...IT'S BETTER...!!
Season Three was the very best of "Melrose" because all the stories were so interesting and incredibly over-the-top. My favorite good characters were Jo and Jake (he is absolutely the perfect man!) And my favorite bad characters were Sydney and Kimberly (she is absolutely the perfect psychotic!) And, deserving honorable mention as one of the bitchiest ladies on "Melrose" is two-faced Brooke.
These are the Season Three usual suspects:
Alison Parker (Courtney Thorne-Smith)
Jo Reynolds (Daphne Zuniga)
Amanda Woodward (Heather Locklear)
Jane Mancini (Josie Bissett)
Jake Hanson (Grant Show)
Dr. Michael Mancini (Thomas Calabro)
Billy Campbell (Andrew Shue)
Dr. Peter Burns (Jack Wagner)
Sydney Andrews (Laura Leighton)
Dr. Kimberly Shaw (Marcia Cross)
Henry/Kimberly's Demon (Zitto Kazann)
Brooke Armstrong Campbell (Kristin Davis)
Matt Fielding (Doug Savant)
Here's all the titillating eps from Season Three with the Original Airdates:
I Am Curious Melrose 9/12/1994
Michael survives the hit and run. Meanwhile Billy finds Alison hiding out with Meredith.
It's a Bad World After All 9/19/1994
An overprotective Kimberly brings Michael home from the hospital. Mr. Andrews and Jane have Sydney committed.
In-Laws and Outlaws 9/26/1994
Chris (Jane's letchy Aussie boyfriend) tells her that Michael must sign off on their new business arrangement. Sydney cops a plea so she can fly out of the crazy hospital.
Grand Delusions 10/3/1994
Sydney starts buzzing around Michael (he's still claiming amnesia) stating she's "Miranda."
Nonsexual Healing 10/10/1994
Everyone's worried when they find out that Jake's boat, "The Pretty Lady" exploded.
No Strings Attached 10/17/1994
Jake leaves town and goes in search of his real father. On the home front, Alison gets a new blonde secretary that can't keep her eyes off Billy.
The Cook, the Creep, His Lover and Her Sister 10/24/1994
Jake buys "Shooters" with the money he gets from the FBI. Meanwhile, Chris makes a filthy pass at Sydney then brags to Jake about what he wants to do to her.
Love Reeks 10/31/1994
Jake is Sydney's night in shining armor.
Dr. Jeckyl Saves His Hide 11/7/1994
Jake convinces Sydney to stick around. Alison claims she's fine with Billy and her old school chum dating although she starts seeing the bottom of an empty vodka bottle more and more.
And Justice for None 11/14/1994
Jo's custody battle (for her unborn baby with Reed) begins. Alison is her star witness but on the eve of her testimony she gets drunk with Zack (her scummy new boyfriend.)
The Days of Wine and Vodka 11/21/1994
Zack convinces Alison to buy a sporty car and bail on work. Sydney decides to sleep with Chris because she is convinced that Jake will suffer if she doesn't. Meanwhile, Kimberly invites Jo over for Thanksgiving hoping that she can get her baby.
The Doctor That Rocks the Cradle 11/28/1994
Alison is arrested for drunk driving. When Bruce hears that Amanda leaked info he fires her. Kimberly induces Jo's labor, delivers the baby, dummies up hospital records, and tells the Carters' lawyer that Jo's baby was stillborn. After the coast is clear Jo comes for her baby and this horrible witch (Kimberly, who else?) refuses to give up Jo's newborn baby because she wants to keep him and raise him as her own! Chris leaves town with Sydney and takes Jane's cash.
Just Say No 12/5/1994
Bruce learns that D&D has been purchased courtesy of a hostage take-over by Amanda and Peter (her latest lover) (played by Jack Wagner.) Bruce then hangs himself inside Amanda's office! Jo is determined to prove that her baby is alive. Michael, Jane and Jake go to Las Vegas to get an otherwise happy kidnapped victim, Sydney.
Sex, Drugs and Rockin' the Cradle 12/12/1994
In rehab Alison meets an NFL star. Even after Michael finds out that "Baby Michael" is Jo's baby he refuses to give him up! After learning that Syd slept with Chris, Jake breaks off their relationship.
Holiday on Ice 12/19/1994
Amanda shows some Christmas cheer and visits Bruce's children giving them a generous cash gift; she also goes to Alison's rehab center to let her know that her job is safe at D&D. After Peter hears that Michael and Kimberly are holding Jo's baby he orders Michael to return little Austin to his mother; Kimberly is beyond enraged. However, she composes herself long enough to let the Carters know that their grandson is very much alive!
Bye Baby 1/2/1995
Catlin Mills comes to D&D; one of Peter's lovers who he tries to pass off as an efficiency expert. Jo's babysitter Emily steals baby Austin! Poor Jo had her baby kidnapped twice and he isn't even a month old!
Love Thy Neighbor: The Baddest and the Best of Melrose Place 1/9/1995
A retrospective hosted by Daphne Zuniga (Jo Beth Reynolds.)
They Shoot Mothers, Don't They? (1) 1/16/1995
Jo confronts Kimberly to find out where Austin is and then gives this kook a much-deserved punch in the face! After she finds out where Austin is, Jo convinces Jake to help her get her baby back. Meanwhile, Peter and Caitlin scheme to get Amanda out of D&D.
They Shoot Mothers, Don't They? (2) 1/16/1995
When Mr. Carter finds Jo outside his cabin he shoots to kill. Back in LA an emergency custody hearing is conducted and the judge decides that Austin should be given up for adoption. Peter tries to put Amanda under the knife for some bogus surgery but Michael saves her in just enough time. Amanda also reaches the D&D board to inform them and Caitlin is given her walking papers.
Another Perfect Day in Hell 1/23/1995
Sydney's trampy new roommate, Ricki vandalizes Jake's bar. Mousy Meredith (Alison's sister) shows her face and admits she has never been with a man, then tries to seduce Billy. Amanda is diagnosed with Hodgkin's Disease.
Boxing Sydney 2/6/1995
Amanda and Michael discuss her cancer treatment. Sydney hits the road with Ricki for a cult-like retreat. Matt's cop friend threatens Kimberly when he learns that she had him attacked (so Matt wouldn't be able to submit her psychological evaluation.) Sydney is held captive by Martin and his followers when they hear she wants to leave.
St. Valentine's Day Massacre 2/13/1995
Martin lets Syd out of the pit and convinces her to stay. Jake and Jane make the long trip to the remote location of the retreat, twice before they're able to get Sydney to come with them! Kimberly is getting more and more jealous when she learns of Michael's role as Amanda's attending doctor.
Breakfast at Tiffany's, Dinner at Eight 2/20/1995
Amanda and Michael fly to New York to see a specialist. Meanwhile, Kimberly places an extremely malicious call to Amanda falsely telling her that her condition is terminal.
And the Winner Is... 2/27/1995
Kimberly catches Amanda and Michael together in a hot tub and threatens to electrocute them. Sneaky and conniving Brooke makes her "Melrose" debut convincing Alison to throw her hat in the competition. Alison upstages Amanda at the Century Awards.
Love and Death 101 3/13/1995
The board appoints Alison president of D&D. Amanda is furious and Michael ships Kimberly out of town while he invites Amanda to come stay with him. Brookes gets a temporary job at D&D.
To Live and Die in Malibu 3/20/1995
Kimberly comes home early only to discover that Goldilocks has been sleeping in her bed. She finds out about the insurance money (from the car accident) and tells Michael he can have all of it only if he gives up Amanda. Michael accepts Kimberly's offer but later files for divorce. Brooke gets a full-time job at D&D. Meanwhile Jess (Jake's older brother) comes to town.
All About Brooke 4/3/1995
Kimberly attempts suicide and Michael is forced to call an ambulance when Syd shows up at the beach house unannounced. Sydney finds Kimberly's suicide note and manages to blackmail both Kimberly and Michael into giving her $50,000 (each!) Brooke tells Billy that she has broken off her engagement and then aggressively starts pursuing him.
Melrose Impossible 4/10/1995
Kimberly goes to a special camp to work on her defensive skills. After she is in remission Amanda has a lot of trouble shooing Michael away. Billy hops in the sack with Brooke; tired of Alison's bossiness.
Hose by Any Other Name 5/1/1995
Amanda hits Michael with a restraining order and she and Brooke finally get rid of Alison from D&D. Kimberly returns from her camp a new women.
Kiss Kiss Bang Bang 5/8/1995
Jake kicks Jess out after Jess taunts him over Jo. Jess then hires a hit man to shoot Jake. Brooke gets Haley to ship Alison off to Hong Kong so that she'll be out of her hair so she can sink her fangs into Billy. Kimberly and Amanda join forces to rid themselves of Michael. "And, I always thought you were the kook," Amanda confesses to Kimberly, apologetically; if only she knew!
Framing of the Shrews 5/15/1995
Jake believes that Jess is behind his shooting. Brooke types up a cold letter to give to Billy from Alison, then she stands in her way when Alison tries to reach Billy (from Hong Kong.) Billy very foolishly proposes to Brooke. Kimberly tries to convince Amanda and everyone that Michael is stalking her (even though she is actually the one who is terrorizing Amanda, because she wants to frame Michael and get Amanda on her side.) And in all her dementia she even has the audaciousness to call the police on Michael as she stages a fake attack at the beach house!
The Big Bang Theory (1) 5/22/1995
Dr. Burns returns with a very cute shaggy blonde haircut and a more sensitive outlook. He bails Michael out of jail and starts seeing Kimberly; all so he can use both of them to get his license back from the medical review committee. Kooky Kimberly starts seeing a demon named "Henry" (in her head) that haunts her and tells her that she must kill everyone (specifically: Michael, Syd, Amanda, kind-hearted Matt, and eventually even Peter.) Alison races back to LA so she can attempt to stop Billy from marrying that witch, Brooke. Jane aggressively goes after Richard (a fashion designer working for the well-known MacKenzie Hart.)
The Big Bang (2) 5/22/1995
Alison make a big splash at the wedding but Billy refuses to listen to her and tells her that if she can't support him she must "go." Spoiled Brooke calls poor Alison an "obsessed alcoholic" and has her security boys escort her off the premises. Jess beats poor Jo when she tells him it's too soon to get engaged. Meanwhile, Kimberly's nutty plan of blowing up the building is in full-swing. Kimberly manages to get Syd tied up in the laundry room and tells her that she'll burn her face the color of her hair unless she calls Michael and convinces him to come to the building. Kimberly also sends Peter a fake note (claiming it's from Amanda) luring him to the courtyard. Alison is in a drunken stupor in her apartment after being shot down at Billy's wedding in front of everyone (by the way, it always perplexed me, how exactly did Alison get her apartment back considering that Amanda hates her and she was officially moved out when she left for Hong Kong...?) Billy and Brooke come back to get their HI tickets. Amanda and Jake find Jo just as Peter sees them in the courtyard; Jake's just about to show Peter out as Jo dramatically begs for mercy at the top of the steps, right outside her apartment. Jake (the eternal knight in shining armor that he always is!) goes after Jess. Jane and Richard are in Jane's apartment (doing who knows what) when MacKenzie shows her 50-something face, yelling at Jane. Michael unties Sydney and the two try to warn everyone to get out of the building because Kimberly has the entire placed rigged with bombs. Everyone manages to make it to the courtyard (except for Alison) for a shocking confession... Suddenly, all eyes are on Kimberly after she pops out of nowhere saying: WAIT... ...IT'S NOT WHAT IT LOOKS LIKE... IT'S WORSE.
"Melrose Place," you never know what they're gonna do; you just want to be there when they do it!! And remember, you are what you watch!