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12 of 13 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars
Baffled by these negative reviews!, July 9 2004
By A Customer
This review is from: ON BECOMING BABYWISE (Paperback)
I have used the Baby Wise suggestions for my 6-month-old son since his birth, and have had a wonderful experience. He was born a month premature (barely 5 pounds) but is now in the 95th percentile for weight and 97th for height (everyone comments on what a big boy he is, and people are shocked that he was so little at birth.) He is a great sleeper, too; he has the ability to peacefully fall asleep with a little cuddle and sometimes a song. His pediatrician knows of his eating/sleeping habits, and says that he is a very healthy boy. Thus I was SHOCKED to read some of the negative reviews here. Granted, I'm not someone who thinks that everyone should use this method, or that people who opt for other parenting styles are "wrong" -- different systems work for different families and each child is unique. But I felt the need to defend this book from those who claim that it is for "lazy parents" (WHAT?!? That's insane!)and that it is somehow abusive. These people need to go back to grade school and learn how to read!! The BabyWise authors do NOT NOT NOT say that you should stick to a certain feeding schedule no matter what. The book suggests creating a balance between routine and flexibility -- and using your God-given brain to know when and when not to break your routine. In fact, there are numerous places where they say you should ALWAYS feed a baby who is truly hungry. But they do point out that just because a baby cries, does not mean it is a hunger cry. They encourage parents to discern the real reason for a baby's cries, rather than just put a bottle in his/her mouth. How can this be a bad thing?? Here are a few quotes to back up my comments: "If your baby shows signs of hunger before 2 1/2 hours, feed her. Hunger cues and parental assessment, not the clock, determine feedings." (page 112) "The mother who insists on watching the clock to the minute lacks confidence in decision-making....Enslavement to the clock is almost as great an evil as a mother who is in bondage to thoughtless emotions." (page 96) "Be careful not to compromise your baby's nutrition while attempting to establish healthy sleep patterns." (page 98) I could go on with a number of similar quotes, but suffice to say that this book does not advocate starving your child. One other thought: At least one reviewer, who advocated methods akin to "attachment parenting," made the clain that the AAP (American Academy of Pediatrics) does not support the BabyWise method. This struck me as 1. untrue and 2. hypocritical for a number of reasons. I find this rather hypocritical because certain attachment-parenting habits are themselves against the guidelines of the AAP. The AAP highly discourages the "family bed" or "co-sleeping" idea, i.e. having your baby sleep in your bed. If reviewers are going to advocate attachment parenting, they should at least have the decency to be honest when making comparisons. I own the AAP handbook on caring for infants and young children, and have found NO contradictions between their advice and that found in BabyWise. To close, BabyWise might not be for everyone, but it is WRONG and MISLEADING to claim that it is dangerous or harmful.
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5.0 out of 5 stars
if you want to survive parenting a newborn... well!, Jun 14 2004
This review is from: ON BECOMING BABYWISE (Paperback)
Being a brand new parent w/o any clue, "Baby Wise" was a life saver. I cannot imagine life being more demanding than it already is. I breastfeed my baby, and it seemed like the only thing i do daily, and i am already completely exhausted. My son was born weighing 6 lbs 4oz. at 15 percentile. I more or less followed the advice from "Baby Wise" to feed him on "flexible schedule". The first month he was on more or less 3 hour feeding schedule around the clock, and starting on 2nd month I let him vary daily on his own. Sometimes he sleeps for 4-5 hours during the day, sometimes he wants to eat every hour for 3-4 hours. But aside from those times, he was pretty much fed mostly every 3-ish hours. At every "well baby" appointment he continues to surprise his doctor with his speedy growth. he quickly doubled his birth weight around 3 months. Right now he weighs more than 14 lbs at 3 months and 2 weeks. He is naturally what you would call a lazy nurser. Soon as he gets on the breast, he falls asleep. Getting him to eat a full-meal worth is heck of a difficult job most of the time. Often I have to pump whatever left and give him a bottle after he was breastfed. But I found that when he ate enough, he's really not too fussy, except when he is gassy. He is a very gassy baby. Daily he would have his time to pass gas and being really uncomfortable. He began to sleep 6 hours when he was 7 weeks old. He is now 3 months and 1+week old (15+ weeks), and has began to sleep 10 hours at night and waking up cooing to his mobile friends (whining a little bit if no one comes for awhile). Everybody loves him and wants to hold him and play w/ him. There's always a line of grandma's/grandpa's, aunts/uncles waiting for their turn to hold him weekly at church. he would talk to them and coo and smile. Everyone thought I'm lucky to have such a good, easy baby. I smile, but I believe it is because that I have followed many of the advices from "Baby Wise". He travels well, sits quietly in his carseat in restaurants, airplane, road trips, because we know when he needs to eat and sleep. Whenever I'm at my wits' end I would refer to the Baby Wise book for help. I believe it is only a book of referencing guidelines, up to each person to customize it to their own needs (and every baby's individual differences!). The Advices from this book worked so well for us, I'd highly recommend it to any parents who need a little extra help to keep their sanity intact and health up by having more sleep.
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1.0 out of 5 stars
Dangerous to the Nursing Relationship, Aug 4 2002
This review is from: ON BECOMING BABYWISE (Paperback)
"Babywise" sets the stage for a lifetime of detached parenting where the parent's convenience is priortized over the emotional and physical well being of the child. However, that is not the worst thing about the book. The unfounded and untested theories of the uncredentialed author can compromise the breastfeeding relationship and has the potential to irreparably harm an infant physically. Ezzo's proposed feeding schedules will result in a reduced milk supply and could cause dehydration and failure to thrive. The book has been denounced by the American Academy of Pediatrics and by Ezzo's own church. I implore you to research and understand the importance of demand feeding to the nursing relationship prior to "babywising" your baby.
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