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Perfect Parenting: The Dictionary of 1,000 Parenting Tips [Paperback]

Elizabeth Pantley
4.8 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (35 customer reviews)
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Book Description

Dec 2 1998 Pantley

Your go-to guide for your parenting questions, from the author of the breakthrough No-Cry series

"Perfect Parenting will give you the tools you need to feel confident as you raise your children. This handy reference book may become an indispensable part of your family's life."
-- from the foreword by William Sears, M.D.

Perfect Parenting is parenting with a plan. It is based on:

  • action, not reaction
  • thoughtfulness, not anger
  • knowledge, not chance
  • common sense, not nonsense
This A-Z guide of practical ideas will inspire you to find the right answers for the many discipline and behavior issues you face every day. Inside you will find many options and methods that can help you be thoughtful in your approach to raising your children.

You'll learn what to do about back talk, dawdling, interrupting, stubbornness, whining. You'll find ways to get your kids to do the chores, stop ignoring you, and clean up their own messes. You'll even learn what to do about other people's children! Elizabeth Pantley designed a questionnaire addressing discipline problems and sent it to hundreds of parents. Their answers shaped this book to make it the most useful, practical book on discipline available today.

Frequently Bought Together

Perfect Parenting: The Dictionary of 1,000 Parenting Tips + Kid Cooperation: How to Stop Yelling, Nagging, and Pleading and Get Kids to Cooperate + Hidden Messages: What Our Words and Actions Are Really Telling Our Children
Price For All Three: CDN$ 45.37

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Product Details

Product Description

From Library Journal

Pantley, the author/publisher of the newsletter Parent Tips, presents an alphabetical "dictionary" of over 200 issues ("Hitting," "Nose-Picking," "Baby-Sitters," "Spitting") using questions and answers. This is a nice idea for a book, but it doesn't quite deliver on its promise. The questions are not age-specific?some of the tips deal with age, but certain problems should have different solutions for children of different ages. There is too much repetition: "Forgetfulness," "Carelessness," and "Procrastination" deal with pretty much the same issues. On the positive side, Pantley does see things clearly from a child's viewpoint and uses the "when/then" approach effectively. Moreover, she's big on consistent parenting without endless yammering. Some of the advice is clever (for cabin fever, front-seat fighting, diaper-changing diversions), but it falls short elsewhere (dealing with moving, name-calling, chores). Not essential.?Linda Beck, Indian Valley P.L., Telford, PA
Copyright 1998 Reed Business Information, Inc.

From the Inside Flap

Endorsements for Perfect Parenting by Elizabeth Pantley:

In my years of raising eight children and advising parents through my pediatric practice and through twenty-three parenting books, I have learned as much as I have given. I have discovered one parenting dilemma that arises repeatedly. This dilemma is the arduous process of deciding on the right course of action when confronted with a discipline or behavior issue.

In my conversations with parents, one type of question invariably arises, "What do I do when my child . . . whines . . . back talks . . . hits her sister . . . won't cooperate . . ." Parents often struggle to find the right answer and then experience frustration when that one right answer fails to solve the problem.

Parenting educator Elizabeth Pantley presents here a multitude of valuable ideas to answer your everyday questions. She gives practical suggestions on a diverse selection of topics that likely cover every parenting dilemma you'll encounter. The beauty of this simple dictionary format is that you can review all the suggestions for any situation, and then use whatever method best fits your child and your family situation to create your own solution. If that suggestion doesn't work, you've got in hand several others from which to choose.

Perfect Parenting will give you the tools you need to feel confident as you raise your children. This handy reference book may become an indispensable part of your family's life.

William Sears, M.D.

Dr. Sears is one of America's most respected pediatricians. He and his wife, Martha Sears, R.N., have been counseling parents for more than twenty years. They appear frequently on national television, are extensively quoted in the media, and have collaborated on twenty-three books on parenting, including The Discipline Book, The A.D.D. Book, The Baby Book, and The Pregnancy Book. William and Martha Sears are the parents of eight children, and grandparents of three.

"Perfect Parenting is full of no-nonsense, practical wisdom about many of the most common, and vexing, child-rearing issues. Parents will find solutions they can put into practice right away."

Peter Herbst, Editor-in-Chief
Family Life Magazine

"Perfect Parenting is THE dictionary for parents. No longer will parents need to thumb through all their books and magazines for answers to common questions. Parents will particularly appreciate the range of possible solutions. The author clearly understands that there is no right answer to any problem. I predict that Perfect Parenting will be the best-thumbed book in all parent's libraries."

Kathy Lyn
Parenting Today
Vancouver, British Columbia

"Perfect Parenting is good news, for parents and kids alike. Here's a wealth of wisdom about children's behavior, coupled with ingenious yet practical solutions to almost every imaginable problem. Elizabeth's approach puts parents in charge, but lets children know they're respected and loved. And it's all wrapped up in one easy-to-access package."

Tamara Eberlein, Author
Whining: Tactics for Taming Demanding Behavior and Sleep: How to Teach Your Child to Sleep Like a Baby

"Perfect Parenting includes just about every issue that comes up for discussion in our parenting classes. The lists of possible solutions will appeal to a wide variety of parenting styles; there is something for everyone! The "think about it" sections that appear after each realistically described situation help to establish a problem-solving perspective and allow the mind to open up to the numerous ways parents' and children's' needs can be met. We are fortunate to have Elizabeth's experiences and humor to help guide us to better relationships with our children."

Connie Schulz, M.S., C.F.L.E.
Family Outreach Specialist, State College Area School District

"Perfect Parenting is a must-have book for today's busy parents who may not have time to read a complete book to find answers to their childrearing problems. With Perfect Parenting parents can quickly look up a specific topic and find several practical, easy-to-follow solutions, all of which foster a loving and respectful parent-child relationship."

Katey Roemmele, Editor
Northwest Family Magazine
Bellingham, Washington

"Some parents are lucky. They go into parenting with skills that they learned by observing effective ways their parents handled certain problems. We have all met them, or maybe you are even one of them. But any one person's experience is limited. Imagine pulling together the collective skills of many of these people and then putting them into a package where all of us could easily access this accumulated wisdom for almost any parenting problem you would have. With Perfect Parenting, Elizabeth Pantley's latest book has given all of us such a wonderful resource.

Rona L. Levy, Ph.D.
Professor, University of Washington
Seattle, Washington

"Perfect Parenting, a parent-friendly compilation of choices and strategies, is practical, wise and witty. It gives parents a pocketful of solutions to everyday conflicts."

Susan Beekman, Author
Battles, Hassles, Tantrums and Tears

"This is THE book to keep on your kitchen counter. It's packed with creative, practical solutions to all your everyday parenting problems. The dictionary format makes it easy to find quick, specific answers. Pantley's advice is based on common sense and sound parenting philosophies."

Dr. Len Fellez, Author
Guerrilla Parenting and Your Child's Self Esteem

Inside This Book (Learn More)
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Customer Reviews

4.8 out of 5 stars
4.8 out of 5 stars
Most helpful customer reviews
2 of 2 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Got a problem? Get an answer! July 17 2003
By A Customer
This is an amazing book with multiple solutions for every imaginable child-raising problem. I find the solutions to be one step ahead of the standard, typical advice -- which often doesn't work! For example, in the section on picky eaters you won't find the usual advice to "just make them eat what's on their plate" (Those experts obviously don't have kids like mine!) Instead this author gives REAL solutions like: "Allow your child the option to have toast or cereal for dinner ONE day a week. When he knows he can skip one meal he'll make a decision to eat things that aren't favorites and save his 'cereal day' for the day you're having the food he likes least." That worked like a charm in our house of five kids! No more nightly dinner battles! Just one kid sitting with a bowl of cereal LOL This book covers the typical problems perfectly, but also covers unique problems with flair. I use it almost every day for quick tips.
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful
4.0 out of 5 stars Great for step parents too!! Feb. 24 2003
This is a book that I frequently pull out anytime a situation comes up with my children that I just don't know the answer to. Just about any problem, scenario or action that you can ever go through with a child is addressed in this book. The best part? Finding that there is always more than one way to deal with anything and realizing that there may be more than one right way to handle yourself.
I have recommended this book to my readers many many times and will many times more.
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Very handy reference! May 16 2003
By Amy K
Excellent A to Z format for all the typical issues you face with your kids. Not just one solution for each problem, but many choices! Covers the standard stuff like chores and fighting, but then goes beyond to give solutions for other things too like getting a kid to wear his glasses, eat his vegetables, behave at his birthday party, stop playing doctor with the neighbor's little girl, stop potty jokes, and quit dawdling. Just an example of the many interesting topics covered.
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5.0 out of 5 stars Indispensable! June 15 2001
Have you ever wished that your child came with an instruction book? Perfect Parenting: The Dictionary of 1,000 Parenting Tips might be just what you have been looking for! This book consists of suggestions on how to deal with all those situations that are sent to try your patience and all those issues which no-one seems to know how to handle.
This book's format is perfect for the busy parent. In alphabetical order and cross-referenced, you will find suggestions on how to cope with everything from allowances to yelling and screaming. Examples include: bath, not wanting one; nightmares; siblings, jealousy; and the ever-worrying TANTRUMS. For each problem, the situation is described and then parents are challenged to "think about it" before being given several possible solutions. The suggestions offered are wonderfully helpful and insightful. There is a wealth of fantastic advice here! As always, Elizabeth Pantley manages to give advice that WORKS, is EASY, and is RESPECTFUL of children. Whether you are a new parent or an old hand, you are bound to benefit from her words of wisdom.
What is particularly perfect about Perfect Parenting is that it is a "one-stop-shop" for a whole gamut of problems, many of which are simply not broached in any other book. In the one book, almost every conceivable parental concern is covered. This is a book which you definitely want to keep in a prominent position on the bookshelf, as you are going to want to refer to it again and again!
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4.0 out of 5 stars Perfect Parenting Jan. 2 2000
This book has been thoroughly researched and contains well thought out, common sense advice for parents. From "Accident prone" to "Yelling" the problems are set out alphabetically, enabling easy access. The solutions are multiple, increasing the chance that the they will suit your family or parenting style and if they don't they are still sure to inspire you.
Each problem has the "situation", a "think about it" section - which often clarifies the problem and informs you on child development and a variety of "solutions" - often as many six or more, giving you a wide variety to choose from.
The book isn't dry or dull, Elizabeth's innovative ideas show imagination and wisdom. A handy reference or a required parenting manual? However you choose to use it, this book will improve your parenting skills, encourage your imagination and fire your enthusiasm. It will remind you that parenting doesn't have to be difficult and thankless. Say goodbye to battles of wills, rebellion and heartache - learn easier methods of training your children, which utilise their "stages" and personality rather than fighting against them.
As a mother of three children, I heartily recommend this book for parents at all stages. From infant problems to teenage rebellion, it is all covered and is done very, very well.
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By A Customer
I offered to review this book, as I love to read new material but didn't think it would be something that I would recommend. Although a mom in my 30's I am not into this generation's "granola parenting". I don't believe in parenting by the book or running to a book every time that a problem arises with my children. The book arrived two days before Christmas and it was set aside in the bustle of the season. When life returned to normal I sat down, book and coffee in hand, and began to read.
From the first page it was obvious that I had judged this book wrong. Out of this book jumped a new, wonderful, and inventive idea in parenting books. It is not cut-and-dry: "you did this wrong, you must do this to fix it." No, something much more creative and helpful treated me that day. A book chock full of ideas...good ideas. And not just one, but a few different ideas to resolve a problem as the same problem does not always have the same root.
As the mom of an Eight Year Old bed-wetter, I jumped right to the "B's" (this book is arranged alphabetically, what a simplistic but wonderful idea!) and looked to see what wisdom awaited me. This, like all topics, is broken down into sections: Situation, Think About It, and Solutions.
"SITUATION My child is out of diapers but continues to wet the bed. THINK ABOUT IT Bed-wetting has come out of the closet and is now recoginized as a common childhood problem. Twenty percent of five-year-olds and 10 percent of six-year-olds routinely wet their beds...."
Perfect Parenting, Pages 32 & 33
This particular topic then had not one, but five different solutions depending on age and situation. Most of the ideas we have tried but there were a few new ones that we are working on.
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Most recent customer reviews
3.0 out of 5 stars It is an ok
Sometime, you are so upset, and you don't know what to do anymore, check if you can find any tips from this book. Read more
Published 8 months ago by Mama Cat
5.0 out of 5 stars Lots of ideas for every issue
This is a great handy book to keep around to pick up a few tips anytime you have an issue with your kids and you don't know what to do. Read more
Published on Nov. 13 2003
5.0 out of 5 stars Practical, realistic and amazingly helpful
With 3 kids very close in age I find this book a very handy resource. Written by a parent educator who is also a mother it's filled with practical solutions. Read more
Published on Oct. 20 2003 by Mother of the zoo
5.0 out of 5 stars Perfect for busy parents
I love the easy-to-use alphabetical arrangement of this book. I'm too busy to read tons of books, but when I have a problem I just look it up in this one. Read more
Published on Aug. 14 2002
5.0 out of 5 stars Perfect for busy parents!
I love the easy-to-use alphabetical arrangement of this book. I'm too busy to read tons of books, but when I have a problem I just look it up in this one. Read more
Published on Aug. 14 2002
4.0 out of 5 stars A-Z help at your fingertips
A great book filled with tips for when you've had it! It offers both quick advice to try immediately as well as strategies to help you plan ahead and be prepared for the next... Read more
Published on May 6 2002
5.0 out of 5 stars What a wonderful book
Don't think twice... just buy it! The tips are awesome and they work. You'll see immediate results. Read more
Published on Feb. 23 2002 by JaimYank
5.0 out of 5 stars Great advice for issues that may arise in your family
First, the book has 9 parenting keys which is essential to every family. Then the book gives a variety of situations/issues that may occur with your child or children. Read more
Published on Oct. 10 2001
5.0 out of 5 stars Help when you need it most: RIGHT NOW.
This is a wonderful and extremely helpful book for looking up quick and informative answers to questions about helping as well as discliplining children. Read more
Published on Sept. 11 2001 by Lillian Moore
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