Polyamory: The New Love Without Limits : Secrets of Sustainable Intimate Relationships [Paperback]

Those pages that ask if you are ready, are the marrow of the book for me. I would have loved chapters devoted to each of those page long statements. But instead, you get the classic chapter on jealousy.

I could tell that the author knows quite a bit about what she is writing about. However it doesn't ccome across in the arrangement of the book or the language that she uses to express the information. The sentences and messages seemed so trivial and didn't carry with it the weight that I feel the book needed.

BUT...if polyamory appeals to you, read on!

Much of the book outlines what should be common sense, but common sense is often the first thing forgotten in any sexual relationship. Anapol writes very clearly and consisely and is very complete in describing each point to her plan for a successful intimate relationship with your mates. Each point that she raises makes sense and I have yet to disagree with any of her ideas.

This book is easy to read. Sometimes, books of this nature focus on flowery language and bury the most important topics with allusions. Instead, this book reads like a straight forward how-to manual for your physical, emotional, and spiritual well-being. Her plain language approach works well in detailing what you need to do to re-channel jealousy as well as what you need to do to make sure everyone in your household remains happy.

Many of the practices and concepts that Anapol raises can also be applied to monogamous relationships, but this book was written with the polyamorous in mind.

The author assures the reader that polyamory is not the equivalent of "swinging," but the differences seem to be negligible. She suggests "coming out" and joining polyamory groups, the sole purpose of which is to gain intimate partners. However, generally, loving relationships are not dependent on being formed in groups where sex is obviously foremost.

To the author, polyamory is an honest approach to life. Negative emotions like jealously have to be overcome. And there is some truth to that. But she downplays the realities of life in maintaining even one relationship. For those who work fulltime with countless family responsibilities including the raising of children, the demands of establishing and maintaining a second relationship without severely impacting the first would be daunting to say the least. Furthermore, it is asking a lot of the other partner to accept extra-marital relationships regardless of any attempts at honesty. The difficulties go way beyond jealousy. It is no wonder that in the interests of self- and marital-preservation that most affairs are kept discreet.

It is difficult to see where the concept of polyamory has a whole lot of validity for the general population. A general life-style of polyamory would seem to appeal to those with strong sexual proclivities, with few real-world, time-consuming commitments. Needless to say, this book is not going to be the basis of a surge of uninhibited, multi-partnered individuals. Most people are just not that obsessed with sex.