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Raising Your Spirited Child: A Guide for Parents Whose Child Is More Intense, Sensitive, Perceptive, Persistent and Energetic Paperback – Jul 3 1992

4.7 out of 5 stars 112 customer reviews

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Product Details

  • Paperback: 320 pages
  • Publisher: Harper Paperbacks; 1 edition (July 3 1992)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0060923288
  • ISBN-13: 978-0060923280
  • Product Dimensions: 1.9 x 13.3 x 20.3 cm
  • Shipping Weight: 249 g
  • Average Customer Review: 4.7 out of 5 stars 112 customer reviews
  • Amazon Bestsellers Rank: #16,656 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
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Product Description

From Amazon

Recently, temperament traits have come to the forefront of child development theory. In Raising Your Spirited Child, Mary Sheedy Kurcinka's first contribution is to redefine the "difficult child" as the "spirited" child, a child that is, as she says, MORE. Many people are leery about books that are too quick to "type" kids, but Kurcinka, a parent of a spirited child herself and a parent educator for 20 years, doesn't fall into that trap. Instead, she provides tools to understanding your own temperament as well as your child's. When you understand your temperamental matches--and your mismatches--you can better understand, work, live, socialize, and enjoy spirit in your child. By reframing challenging temperamental qualities in a positive way, and by giving readers specific tools to work with these qualities, Kurcinka has provided a book that will help all parents, especially the parents of spirited children, understand and better parent their children.

From Publishers Weekly

Kurcinka's now-classic guide to raising children who are "more"—more intense, more sensitive, more persistent, etc.—gets a greatest-hits treatment in this brief audio version read by the author, a teacher and parent educator. The abridgement can be abrupt at times; in the effort to condense a 300-page book to a three hours, many memorable and useful examples, illustrations and anecdotes have been excised in favor of general principles and descriptions of the basic traits common to spirited children. Helpfully, though, each CD is imprinted with track titles and time signatures, a great boon to parents who want to retrieve specific information quickly. Kurcinka's voice can sometimes be a problem; it tends to trail off to such a low end-of-sentence volume that listeners may have to strain to catch what she is saying. Kurcinka never really achieves a deep or comfortable vocal resonance even at the best of times, though she does exhibit a quiet dramatic intensity despite the brittle, high tones. In all, it's difficult to justify the additional $10 this audio costs over the far meatier trade paperback version, which offers considerably more bang for the buck. HarperCollins paperback. (Dec.)
Copyright © Reed Business Information, a division of Reed Elsevier Inc. All rights reserved. --This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.

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Inside This Book

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Customer Reviews

Top Customer Reviews

Format: Paperback
I heard about this book on one of my preschool message boards and WHAT A RELIEF! Our first child was calm, easygoing, etc., so when our second little bundle hit the planet -- what a shock! "Difficult." "Hypersensitive." "High-Needs." "High Maintenance." "Spoiled." "Sensory Integration Disorder." What else? People recommended massage, chiropractic adjustments, strict discipline, etc. etc. etc. We absolutely adore our daughter and realized early that she was just MORE. As soon as I started reading this book, I felt such wonderful relief to realize that we weren't the only parents struggling to understand and deal with our spirited child. And not much of a surprise to learn that I'm also a spirited parent. After the first few chapters, I noticed that my interactions with our daughter became much more relaxed and pleasant. One of the first big changes was our use of "time-out." You know, there are numerous articles about this subject, but this one really made sense. We've started teaching Belle that timeout is a place she can go just to cool off. Instead of the horrible demand, "Go to timeout," now I simply ask, "Do you think maybe you need to take a little timeout until you're feeling more calm?" This one little thing alone has made our days soooo much more pleasant.
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Format: Paperback
From the point of birth, or as early as conception, did you recognize your child was "more"? Is his/her temperament more intense, more persistent, more sensitive, more perceptive, and are they more uncomfortable with change? Perhaps they are hard to get onto any kind of schedule. They may exhibit an incredibly high energy level. Their first reaction to anything new may be a rapid withdrawal or a resounding no, only to see them fully participate when warmed up. Are they analytical and always have a suggestion for change? Not all of the aforementioned characteristics need be present. However, if these sound familiar, you may be the blessed parent of a spirited child. I am not referring to a religious form of spirit. Rather, I am referencing a personality type.
Detail and Insight
Within the pages of Raising Your Spirited Child, author Mary Kurcinka assists the reader toward understanding what 'Spirited' looks like, and gives us tools to work with children whom fall within this spectrum. She brings to this publication professional and personal experience, explaining that the premise was birthed due to her own parental experience. In addition to writing this publication, Mary has helped numerous parents and educators via seminars, classes and additional publications.
The term "Spirited Children" can be credited to Mary Kurcinka finding an appropriate word to explain, and in my case take the place of, the all too typical labels of: difficult, strong willed, stubborn, and so forth. Prior to reading this publication I used the word strong-willed, but grasped adoration for the word spirited, allowing it to become a positive replacement. This book is one that I initially devoured and continue to return for more indulgence.
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Format: Paperback
I'm the mother of 3 girls, and this is the most useful book I've read. While some reviewers take issue with the methods Kurcinka advocates in dealing with the spirited child, I found it incredibly valuable just for the better attitude it gave me towards my daughter. Just to realize she wasn't the only child who threw fits about her socks was so helpful! I went from honestly not being able to enjoy much time with my daughter because of the constant screaming and drama, to being able to respond in a constructive way and eliminate many of the battles before they began. It got me looking at my daughter's behavior in a different, more positive way, and realizing that the point of being a parent isn't just to get your child to obey you, but to know how to avoid the conflict in the first place when you can!
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Format: Paperback
Some of the advice in this book was good- particularly the parts that remind parents children aren't displaying inappropriate behaviour intentionally. However, I found that I followed this book to a tee for about two years. What I ended up with was a child with no ability to tolerate anything unpleasant- waiting in line, being quiet at the library, basically she did whatever she felt like and the book advised that this is the way to parent spirited children. I then read the book The Omnipotent child, implemented the advice in that book, and my life changed. Now a year later what I can see clearly is that in Raising Your Spirited Child it gives parents licence to not hold their children responsible for anything they do. The problem with this logic is other people don't really care if your child is "Spirited"- teachers and friends aren't going to say it's okay that your child didn't join circle, or wouldn't cooperate at play time because they are spirited. Parents need to discipline their spirited children lovingly but persistently. Parents need to help their spirited children deal with their sensitivities in such a way that they are still able to function in the real world. My advice- Read Dr. Thomas Millar's "the Omnipotent Child". You will be thrilled that you did!!!!
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