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Rebuilding: When Your Relationship Ends Paperback – Nov 26 2015

4.9 out of 5 stars 43 customer reviews

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Product Details

  • Paperback: 304 pages
  • Publisher: Impact; 3 edition (Nov. 26 2015)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 1886230692
  • ISBN-13: 978-1886230699
  • Product Dimensions: 22.9 x 15.3 x 1.8 cm
  • Shipping Weight: 408 g
  • Average Customer Review: 4.9 out of 5 stars 43 customer reviews
  • Amazon Bestsellers Rank: #2,492 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
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Product Description

Review

"...a handbook for the divorcing and divorced that is authentic and which they can employ in the rebuilding of their own lives." -- Esther Oshiver Fisher, J.D., Journal of Divorce

"...deals with the everyday feelings and problems of the divorcing and divorced... hits just the right balance between seriousness and optimism." -- Florence Kaslow, Ph.D., Journal of Marital and Family Therapy

"...warm, simple, and direct... this is a book you will not want to put down." -- A.R.E. Press

"I found the book comforting, helpful and realistic -- it is going to hurt, and it will not be easy, but you can do it." -- Marilyn Anita Dalrymple, Affaire de Coeur

"If you're putting your life back together after a divorce, you need this book! It could be just what you're looking for to help you get your life back on track. I found it to be very interesting and informative." -- Jeanette Wright, Borger News-Herald, Borger, Texas

"One of the best books written for the divorcing person... warm, engaging." -- the Behavior Therapist --This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.

From the Publisher

Books in the Rebuilding Books series "for divorce and beyond" are written for those going through divorce or rebuilding their lives after divorce. Inspired by the work of renowned divorce therapist, Dr. Bruce Fisher, the Rebuilding Books offer expert information and practical self-help procedures. These straightforward, life-affirming resources can help make the divorce process easier, healthier, and less painful, leading to more-fulfilled lives and stronger "second-time" relationships. --This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.

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Customer Reviews

4.9 out of 5 stars
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Top Customer Reviews

Format: Paperback
After my marriage suddenly ended I spent all my time in the self-help section of a major book store chain looking for the one book that would have the answers to help me get over the traumatic break up. I flipped through every book they had on the shelves. I went to through every section that was remotely related. 'Relationships', 'Self-help', 'Divorce' 'Loss', 'Grieving', 'Psychology', etc. I wanted to find that 'quick fix'.
After purchasing a few books that did really nothing for me, a friend recommended this book to me.
I wished that I had found this book earlier. This book is like a relationship bible. It has practical steps on how to get through the pain, talks about the different feelings that you will go through and coming through the other side into your new life just to name a few. There will be times when you read it and will totally identify with what's being said. This book contains many little 'gold nuggets' of information. Little gems of wisdowm sprinkled throughout the book.
This book was the best one out there that I found and it was very much worth the money. This is the only book that you will need. You won't be disappointed.
Have faith and trust that you will recover. I did.
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Format: Paperback
This book gives excellent, practical advice for toiling through 19 stages of recovery in a divorce. Each chapter is unique, and gives homework for the person to work through topics like anger, loneliness, grieving, etc. I found the chapter on dumper/dumpee relationships (grief vs. guilt) and the chapter on love to be the most valuable. Fisher describes many types of love, and allows a confused person to sort out where they and their spouse actually stood with each other, both during and after a marriage. Unravelling confusion is important to anybody going through a divorce. I cannot more strongly recommend this book to anybody who has been dumped by their spouse. Buy it, keep it, and go back to it many times over the months you may be trying to "climb your mountain".
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Format: Paperback
Years ago, when my first marriage ended, a friend loaned me this book and I'm so grateful that he did. Well, I need it again. So I picked up another copy of this book. Divorce and separation is an excruciatingly painful experience. The author gives straight forward and practical advise on how to cope with this type of loss. When your heart is breaking and you feel as if you will drown in your grief, having this book will help anchor you when you might not be thinking very straight. The book "Rebuilding: When Your Relationship Ends," will not only comfort you, it will be your own personal guide to aid in the healing process and starting your life over.
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Format: Paperback
A close friend, a survivor of divorce, gave me this book when I started my divorce and I am thankful for that, as well as the authors. When I first read it, it felt as if someone is peering into my mind and picking my thoughts and feelings, it's almost unreal how the authors know EXACTLY what I feel and what help I need. The book is remarkably easy to read and understand but please do not be fooled. It's not as easy to do the exercises because it's A LOT of pain, but the exercises are really useful and totally essential. All you need is to be totally honest with yourself and how you feel. This is a wonderful companion to take on your journey in singlehood. You will survive singlehood.
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Format: Paperback
Whenever I know of someone who has separated from their spouse I immediately recommend this book. It is, in my opinion, essential reading. It lets us know that what we feel at such a time is completely NORMAL and that things do get better. It also reminds us that we have a LOT more freedom to rediscover ourselves than we ever imagined.

The book presents a series of 19 building blocks that most separated people progress through (starting with such nasties as Fear, Loneliness, Anger and even Guilt) leading all the way to Freedom. Not everyone progresses through the building blocks in the same sequence, nor in the same amount of time. Some people get stuck at some stages and, I think, this is the book's greatest strength. It reminds us that there are feelings we need to work through BEFORE we can really consider ourselves healed (or mostly healed). And we're really not very useful to ourselves (or our children) if we don't take the effort to start that healing. We deserve better. We deserve being all that we can be and progressing through those blocks will help you do so.

It is not an easy ready since it does make us really think but I have found the advice (after 3 years of being separated) is solid, practical and true .... sometimes in hindsight (as in ... "d'oh they were right").
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Format: Paperback
This book is a self-help manual for those trying to recover from a divorce, or going through the process of divorce. "Rebuilding" is the feelings that surface during this trying and stressful period of your life are identified. It is comforting to read that we are not alone in our pain and confusion and that given the circumstances, the turmoil you are experiencing is quite normal. As each emotion is explored, the reasons for them are also examined. An example from another who has suffered the same misery is given, then the best part--what we can do with and about those upsetting, hurtful and sometimes hateful feelings that want to pull us under and drown us. The chapter continues to describe the emotional cycles the "dumpers" (the one ending the relationship) and the "Dumpee" (the one being rejected) go through. Fisher and Alberti acknowledge not everyone is going to react the same, but no one escapes the pain. No matter how we are affected, though, we must remember guilt and rejection are tied to feelings of self-worth and self-love. Build up these two areas, and we will be less devastated by life's inevitable rejections. The end of each chapter has a "How Are You Doing?" section. A list of questions will help us think our way through our dilemmas and offer ideas with which we can rebuild our lives. I like this book because it forces us to do something besides sitting around feeling sorry for ourselves. There are ways to work through relationships that end, and we have the power and the tools to do it. We don't have to feel helpless. I like this book because it acknowledges we are not alone with our feelings. There is light at the end of the tunnel. We can go on to live a normal, happy life. It gives us hope.
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