I'm a 'hard sci-fi' fan but this book still had some qualities that I enjoyed. For instance, the alien culture was well thought-out and had real depth.
However, as a man, I have to admit, all of the male bashing was a little over the top. Grnated, even though the alien men were supposed to be so dangerous that they weren't even allowed around women or children, they were never actually depicted raving like lunatics and in fact were extremely well-behaved. It's possible I completely misintrepreted the author's meaning, for all I know, she wanted to show that the aline men were only perceived as dangerous but weren't really any more than males of any other species.
But when the human female is getting grilled by the alien females about how and why she can live in the proximity of males, I was waiting for her to explain that human men don't often go around killing children or women at random. The human female appeared to have had a decent life without much exposure to male violence. And sometimes, in our culture, women are the source of violence as well.
I just hoped that the discussion wouldn't have been so one-sided.