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The last thing new parents can find time for is quiet reading, so many helpful books on infant care rely on bullet points and a "let's get to the point" writing style. Tracy Hogg, a neonatal nurse, teacher, and mother of two, uses these techniques to good effect in Secrets of the Baby Whisperer. Focusing on newborns and their parents, her simple programs are a blend of intelligent intuition and methods based on years of experience. The first half of the book is devoted to E.A.S.Y--her name for creating a structured daily routine for you and your baby that makes the most of your baby's awake times and also leaves time just for you. These concepts aren't designed to force your bundle of joy into not following her body's needs, but rather to create a feasible middle ground between total rigidity and on-demand food and sleep (and no time for mom to shower). If it still strikes you as too regimented, keep reading. The author makes room for differences in personal style and includes short quizzes to determine whether you're a "planner" or a "winger", and what level of daily structure you are likely to find helpful. In the same chapter, she identifies five general temperaments of infants, how to get an accurate feel for yours, and what methods of care are likely to be the most effective for his temperament. Her statement that babies prefer routine is backed up by research from the University of Denver. While most of the book relies on anecdotes to get the points across, Hogg does find room to back up some of her statements with quotes from various researchers and institutions. Included at the end of the book are assurances that E.A.S.Y. can be followed even with a colicky baby or one who's been ruling the roost for the first few months. Frustrated parents might like to read the last page first: "all the baby-whispering advice in the world is useless unless you're having a good time being a parent" is an excellent reminder to enjoy this time with all of its ups and downs. --Jill Lightner
--This text refers to the
Hardcover
edition.
From Library Journal
Hogg, an English nurse and founder of Baby Technique, a Los Angeles-based newborn and lactation consulting firm, has a way of calming and caring for babies that led one of her clients to dub her "the baby whisperer." In this, her first book, she teaches parents how to decipher "infants' language"Dtheir cries, gestures, and facial expressions. Her E.A.S.Y. (eat, activity, sleep, your time) method offers a relaxed, commonsense approach. Every aspect of care for mom and baby is covered, with interesting charts and clear references. There are many good books on baby care, such as Arlene Eisenberg and others' What To Expect the First Year (LJ 6/1/89), Jodi A Mindell's Sleeping Through the Night (LJ 6/1/97), and, of course, Dr. Spock's oeuvre, but this book possesses unusual tenderness and heart, and it respects babies as people, albeit little ones. For all public libraries and any parenting shelf, this is the perfect gift for a new mom and family.DAnnette V. Janes, Hamilton P.L., MA
Copyright 2001 Reed Business Information, Inc. --This text refers to the Hardcover edition.
Copyright 2001 Reed Business Information, Inc. --This text refers to the Hardcover edition.
Inside This Book
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First Sentence
No event in an adult's life equals both the joy and the terror of becoming a parent for the first time. Read the first page
Front Cover | Copyright | Table of Contents | Excerpt | Index
No event in an adult's life equals both the joy and the terror of becoming a parent for the first time. Read the first page
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Most helpful customer reviews
44 of 50 people found the following review helpful
1.0 out of 5 stars
Not what is seems,
By A Customer
This review is from: Secrets of the Baby Whisperer: How to Calm, Connect, and Communicate with Your Baby (Paperback)
Tracy Hogg claims this is a middle of the road approach. It isn't. As a parent and as a licensed marriage and family therapist, I have read most of the parenting books on the market. This book isn't much different from all of the other sleep training books out there. It is obvious it is written from the perspective of a babysitter rather than a medical doctor or psychologist. Her change a "bad" habit in three days is ridiculous and oversimplified. Yes, you can change a behavior if you are ruthless enough about it, but that doesn't mean you should. Picking up the baby and putting them back down repeatedly as she recommends might make you feel like you are doing something rather than just leaving them there to cry, but you aren't meeting the babies need for closeness. In one example she explains that in one night she picked up and put a baby down 172 times (when he cried, she picked him up and as soon as he stopped she put him down), how frustrating for this poor baby who was trying to communicate a need that went unmet. After several days, the baby gave up and didn't cry in his crib anymore. She cites this as an example of how great her training program is. Babies are people with needs. I met a family recently who used this approach and their baby responded to this program like a trained pup. She was complacent and passive. She slept through the night without a peep and from 8:00 p.m. to 7:00 a.m. Her daily routines involved videos, bottles, and crib-time with a bunch of pacifiers. No rocking, no lullabyes, definitely no nursing. It definitely was easy as her "E.A.S.Y." program implies. But, this kind of approach has negative long term effects. The mother said that the approach is great because her child doesn't have to "waste energy communicating her needs" because they tell her what she needs. This is a big premise of this book. I found this very sad. Children need to learn to identify their needs, communicate their needs, and have those needs met. In this process they learn to communicate and have healthy trusting relationships with others. These sleep training programs are based on behavioral psychological theories. The problem with this is that these approaches are more appropriate for animals, which is how these theories developed, and can be used for older children and adults for certain problems. But it is completely developmentally inappropriate to use these behavior modification approaches with human infants. The first 12 to 18 months of life the primary task of a human infant is to learn to trust. Books like this make the routine more important than the relationship. This causes significant long term relationship problems that the child will struggle with in the years to come. I see this every day in my practice-problems with intimacy and materialism, attaching and finding comfort in objects continuing later in life- the bottle, pacifier, and blankie become the cigarette, the alcoholic drink, the compulsive shopping, the compulsive eating, etc tomorrow. Of course the occasional use of a pacifier or bottle when mom isn't available is handy, but overrelying on mother substitutes as Tracy recommends is not good for your child. If you want to learn more about child development, go right to the source and study Winnicott, Kohut and Bowlby. Or if you want to read a book marketed to parents the only author I can recommend who is consistent with developmental needs is Dr. Sears.
3 of 3 people found the following review helpful
2.0 out of 5 stars
Why don't you come over here and say that, "luv"?,
By Iryssa (Alberta, Canada) - See all my reviews
This review is from: Secrets of the Baby Whisperer: How to Calm, Connect, and Communicate with Your Baby (Mass Market Paperback)
This book had me in tears and feelng like a terrible mom. I'd seriously like this woman to come over here and try to put MY baby on her supposedly "EASY" program. Maybe it works for those babies she describes as "Angel" and "Textbook" babies, but it sure didn't work for my "Spirited" baby (by the way, if you don't like labels or generalizations, stay away from this book).The chapter on sleep would be ridiculous if it weren't so frustrating, as with the chapter on how one can (supposedly) change any bad habits in three days. In her own description of solving one family's sleep problems, she boasts of how she picked the child up and put him back down again in his crib FORTY-THREE TIMES. Oh sure, that worked great. The next night they only did it twenty times! By the way, she--the baby nurse--was doing this while the parents were getting their full night's sleep. Unfortunately, I don't have $200.00+/day to spend on a baby nurse. I would have to go without sleep that first night, almost no sleep that second night, and by the third night I'd be declared legally insane (that is, of course, provided I didn't hang myself from the rafters by the 38th repetition). This book would get no stars if it weren't for the moderately helpful charts to help identify your baby's cries. Verdict? Great if you're looking for a book to help you choose a baby nurse, or if your baby is a Textbook child....completely impractical iif you're like the rest of us.
2 of 2 people found the following review helpful
2.0 out of 5 stars
Some Useful Bits....But Too Much Condescension, Luv,
By A Customer
This review is from: Secrets of the Baby Whisperer: How to Calm, Connect, and Communicate with Your Baby (Paperback)
The EASY plan has actually worked quite well for my 10 week old son, so far. I think, perhaps, this is because he tends to get hungry every three hours, so the routine fits in with what he would normally do anyway.What I really could not bear is Hogg's tone. She uses some of the most patronizing language I've read in any parenting book (i.e. "that dreadful swing"). Her anecdotes seemed contrived, if not completely fictional. They're more self-congratulatory than anything else, allowing her to demonstrate time and again that these poor lost parents would simply continue down the road to domestic failure if she hadn't appeared. A friend had recommended "The Happiest Baby on the Block" by Dr. Harvey Karp and I found this truly essential in calming the baby during his first weeks. To his her own, I guess...but I can't recommend Hogg...too much ego.
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