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Sex Workers As Virtual Boyfriends [Paperback]

Joseph Itiel
4.0 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (4 customer reviews)
List Price: CDN$ 44.76
Price: CDN$ 37.70 & this item ships for FREE with Super Saver Shipping. Details
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Book Description

Mar 13 2002
Beyond lust, create companionship with your sex workers!

Many more men are willing to buy sex than to admit the fact. Joseph Itiel is not only willing to admit it--he has the courage and style to create “virtual” relationships with hustlers. These ongoing professional relationships are a step beyond cold, anonymous sex for sale. Though the economic basis remains the same--an open exchange of cash for sex--the association is also honest, affectionate, and sexually fulfilling. He explains how you can do the same in Sex Workers as Virtual Boyfriends, a companion volume to his best-selling A Consumer's Guide to Male Hustlers (Haworth 1998).

From his own experience, stretching over four decades and many nations, the author suggests ways to transform the relationship between a client and his escort from a crass commercial transaction to a true camaraderie. Sex Workers as Virtual Boyfriends also offers an intimate glimpse into the gay lifestyle in San Francisco and around the world before the AIDS epidemic and in these days of safer sex.

Sex Workers as Virtual Boyfriends presents practical tips and real-life vignettes, including:
  • an experiment to help you decide if you could be a sex worker (See if you measure up!)
  • an appendix containing a comprehensive list of sex workers advertising on the World Wide Web
  • seven guidelines for friendly relations with your escort
  • a guide to the etiquette of negotiable affection
Sex Workers as Virtual Boyfriends is shocking, sexy, literate, and fun. It also can help you find the affection you want--at a price you can afford.

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Review

"Full of wit and charm... A fun read!" - Hubert Kennedy, PhD, editor of The Ideal Gay Man; "Fascinating, informative and valuable" - Joe Hanssen, Top Reviewer, Amazon.com

About the Author

Joseph Itiel, author of A Consumer's Guide to Male Hustlers, likes to say that in his senior years he has been blessed with great (and affordable) sex workers. Having met his first hustlers - as they were called then - some forty years ago, he has had the time and perseverance to shape these commercial encounters into virtual friendships.

Inside This Book (Learn More)
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First Sentence
Late in the evening of December 31, 1999, Gabriel, to whom I dedicated Chapter 10 in A Consumer's Guide to Male Hustlers, called to wish me a happy New Year. Read the first page
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Front Cover | Copyright | Table of Contents | Excerpt | Index | Back Cover
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5.0 out of 5 stars a sex worker's point of view April 3 2003
By A Customer
Format:Paperback
As a former sex worker, I want to praise the author of "Sex Workers as Virtual Boyfriends" for his insightfulness into hustlers' lives. For two difficult years I put myself through college as a parking valet. The work was hard, the pay miserable, and I breathed in a lot of polluted air. Then I started escorting. The job was easy for the most part, the pay excellent, and my health was not in jeopardy. Like the author says, a few clients did also become good friends. ... Of course, it is older dudes paying for the services of the younger guys. They get paid *because* they are younger and nobody is being exploited. We, young escorts know exactly what we are doing, and the older clients spend their money to fulfill their needs. I highly recommend the book to anyone who wants to understand the life of sex workers.
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1.0 out of 5 stars Unpleasant at best Feb 22 2003
Format:Paperback
It is astonishing to me that this book was published at all. Much less by a scholarly small press. In Mr Itiel's defence it must be acknowledged that his writings will be of some value as source material for students of gay men and class dynamics. What makes this volume as revealing as it is disturbing are the insights offered unwittingly. Mr Itiel exhibits boundless pride in confiding his expert technique for scoring more sex for less dollars. In one memorable entry he shares tips on how best to train boys not to expect gifts - blithefully unconscious of any parallel to guidebooks on training spaniels. Almost in the same breath he asks we take special note that some of his rent boys grow into friends of a sort - even 'virtual boyfriends'. He urges us to follow his example.

So fevered is the author's earnestness some readers may not consider that his voiceless young men friends might have very different 'insights' to offer. In the seemingly improbable event any of them will ever be afforded opportunity to author how-to books.

Mr Itiel candidly portrays himself as a financially successful middle-aged white man with a preference for dark-skinned youths typically from lower income backgrounds (but always of 'legal' age, he carefully emphasizes - rather conveniently ignoring the fact that his books endorse activities which are illegal in his native California and are harshly punished in every state in the US). Some would see his sexual predilection as inherently exploitive. That is not my viewpoint. What does alarm me is that Mr Itiel appears so far beyond even contemplating the ethics of older men of means bartering with boys from the barrio for pleasures of the flesh.

Readers with a conscience should take note of several earlier books by Mr Itiel. PHILIPPINE DIARY : A GAY GUIDE TO THE PHILIPPINES offers tips on how to win over the parents of an island 'call boy'. As for PURA VIDA! : GAY AND LESBIAN COSTA RICA the two reader reviews posted here on Amazon.com are a character reference which the publisher of this book should have heeded.

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5.0 out of 5 stars Finally! Someone Got It Right! May 23 2002
Format:Hardcover
This is an absolutely wonderful book!!! And definitely a must read for clients as well as sex workers. I myself am a sex worker in San Francisco and I really applaud Mr. Itiel for writing this book. The very title is what caught my eye to begin with. As a sex worker, I have always strived to create the same type of "sex plus" relationships with my clients that Mr. itiel has created with his sex workers. So I am delighted to finally see a book that emphasizes what the client/sex worker relationship is really all about - a mutual respect for one another as well as a caring friendship, besides the obvious good fun! The book contains many interesting stories about Mr. Itiel's experiences over the years with various sex workers. I really only found 1 area in which I strongly disagreed with Mr. Itiel - he feels that, in general, sex workers charge too much for their services. While I feel that what a responsible sex worker can offer to his client certainly justifies the cost, I can also understand that, as the client, Mr. Itiel would like to be able to find sex workers as inexpensively as possible. And he has managed to do this quite successfully, proving there is a market for all of us.I highly recommend this book to anyone who wants a greater understanding of the dynamics behind the sex worker/client relationship. I think both sex workers and clients will benefit from reading this book - and both will benefit from enhancing their relationships with one another.
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