Siblings Without Rivalry Audio Cassette – Audiobook, Jun 1 1996
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With a title like this, it's no surprise that authors Adele Faber and Elaine Mazlish had a monster bestseller on their hands when the book first appeared in 1988. From the subsequent deluge of readers' stories, questions, and issues, they have created nearly 50 pages of new material for this, the 10th anniversary edition. The central message remains the same, and sounds almost too simple: avoid comparisons. But parents know that's easier said than done. The value of Faber and Mazlish's discussions is precisely that they talk you through umpteen different situations and outcomes to help you teach your brawling offspring a new set of responses. The highly informative text is punctuated with helpful summary/reminder boxes and cartoons illustrating key points. It's a must-read for parents with (or planning on) multiple children. But parents of young children who get along fine (so far) should read it too--as the authors make very clear, rivalry is inevitable. The only question is how to manage the rivalry with intelligence and compassion, and on that subject they offer a wealth of good advice. --Richard Farr --This text refers to the Paperback edition.
From Library Journal
Disciples of the late Haim Ginott, a child psychologist, Faber and Mazlish have conducted workshops on family relationships and co-authored Liberated Parents, Liberated Children (Avon, 1975) and How To Talk So Kids Will Listen and Listen So Kids Will Talk (Rawson Wade, 1980). The present book states that sibling rivalry stems from jealousy similar to that a spouse might feel if asked to welcome another husband or wife into the household. It outlines ways to defuse such explosive situations as comparing, assigning roles, or taking sides and suggests specific remedies to avoid conflict. Cartoon-like illustrations and "quick reminders" help reinforce new behavior. A welcome assist over the rough times that too often leave lifetime scars. Suzanne Druehl, Little Rock Public Library, Ark.
Copyright 1987 Reed Business Information, Inc. --This text refers to the Hardcover edition.
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Top Customer Reviews
One of the strategies suggested in both books that has really reduced my frustration level is to redefine being "fair" as "meeting each child's needs" rather than focusing on being totally "equal" at all times. This thought is very helpful because my kids seem to always keep score...Read more ›
born, I read the first chapter or two of this book and found it
very useful for dealing with my older child's jealous behavior.
Now that my second is 1 1/2 and the two children are playing
together and having so many conflicts, I picked the book back
up and read it from cover to cover. There are so many helpful
anecdotes. The book has given me words to handle so many
frustrating situations. It is one of my favorite
books on child-raising!
Barbara Coloroso's book is also a "must read". These 3 books were the reason my kids have turned out so great. They are all happily married, two grandkids & more to come. They all actually like coming home every Saturday with their extended families to hang out with us.
Just read the book over & over. If you make a mistake in how you react, don't sweat it. Try again next time or reword your reaction. It seems forced at first but it becomes second nature after a while.
When investigating the problem of sibling rivalry, the culprit and the root of the problem comes from parents' attitudes toward their children. Are you a parent that has labeled your children? Sometimes parents attach a label to their children without realising it and the consequences are creating excesive pressure on the children to play a certain roll that they have no desire to but continue to act it out in order not to hurt the parent.
Children want to be heard and adults must first learn to listen and acknowledge the childrens' feelings. When children are mad or angry, it is important that we help the describe what they are feeling and let them know that it is alright to be mad, sad, angry or disappointed, however it is not acceptable to hurt the person with whom they are having conflict. The whole idea of this solution sounds like it was concieved in some fairy tale but it works about 90 percent of the time to reduce the tension between the fighting children in our family. After the tensions have subsided between the siblings, the parents suggest the children find a solution to their problem and they actually come up with some creative things.
The authors have integrated numerous real live scenarios they have encountered from parents who have participated in their seminars over several years.Read more ›
Most recent customer reviews
My kids are still fighting. Even as I right this, one is biting the other. They didn't read the book hardly at all.Published 4 months ago by jimmy and timmy
I have used many of the strategies on my boys and they really work. They haven't played this well together ever. Read morePublished 7 months ago by Sandi Mae O'Brien
An excellent book - not a magic bullet, but full of helpful ideas on how to handle fighting between siblings!Published 8 months ago by Amazon Customer
I don’t have multiple children (yet) but I bought this book because I wanted to understand how to prevent sibling rivalry. Read morePublished 11 months ago by Catherine
I will be re-reading this book many times over the next decade or so (my kids are currently 1 and 3, so a bit young for this, but it'll be good to start out practicing these... Read morePublished 18 months ago by Amy Pullen
This one talks about many issues such as fighting, comparing, role prescribing etc. The author gives great examples from family situations. Read morePublished on Dec 10 2013 by Anna
When I was pregnant with my second child, I was very worried about this subject, because I have a horrible relationship with my sister, who constantly competes with me, even today. Read morePublished on Aug. 9 2013 by Mama Cat
I bought this for a friend who's children fight constantly and it's a huge worry. She is finding it very helpful. Thank you, excellent service and product.Published on Feb. 3 2013 by Adelaide Campbell
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