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3.0 out of 5 stars
The Choice was mines..., Jul 13 2004
I finish reading Kettelwell's "Skin Games" It only took me about two weeks to read it. I have to say, I didn't like in the beginning when she refer to her scars as "Sins" but I did like how she threw in the whole Southern experience, "Scarlett O'Hara" and "Gone with the Wind," I'm a sucker for that culture.Kettlewell writing is a little strong for me. She made me, the reader, feel benith her; She uses such words expressing her cutting that to the mind of an English teacher would understand, but to the simple minded reader...she needed to use small words...She jumps from first person point of view to third persons. She writes of her life as a long script. She is the actor and this is her play. Such as her first wedding date when she writes "I show up on the Church's lawn, Half hour before it all begin. I came in shorts and a shirt, and I had my wedding dress thrown over my shoulder..." She's done research that can be apply to her own personal life. She writes about how she had to lie to tell people about her cutting, as "Did tell a lie to keep myself happy, or did I tell it not to worry them?" In the end, she brought everything together, when she writes "I stop cutting because I always could have stop cutting; that the pain and inelegant truth. No Matter how compelling the urge, the act itself was always a choice. I had no power over flood tite of emotions that drove me to that brink, but I had the power to decide whether not to step over. Eventually I decided not to......You have to make your journey, and bear its scars" I think that is so true and cleverly written. Its myself who is cutting and this is hard to admit. I am the one who is holding the razor to my flesh, and I am the one who cleans it up afterwards. I can't blame it on no one but myself. I don't have control over people's though, words and actions that can sometimes lead me to cut, but I am the one who is doing it. I can't (yet) control my thoughts and emotions, but I can control my actions. The choice was mine, and mine completely. I could have any prize that I desired. I could burn with the splendor of the brightest fire, Or else, I could choose time. Its like once you put your hand in the flame you can never be the same. There's a certain satisfaction in a little bit of pain. You learn form that. Life is a learning experience. So I actually took something away from Kettlewell Story. Granted it might not have been what I wanted...but its something that I always knew.
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