The Sociopath Next Door [Paperback]

As the title says, this is a must read book for everyone (that is, everyone who is not a psychopath). The only thing I don't like about it is the use the word "sociopath" instead of "psychopath". But it is a very minor flaw in a great book.

Traditionally, books on psychopathy were mostly about the inmate population, serial killers and so on. That creates a dangerous sense of complacency. After all, the psychopaths are easily recognizable brutal killers and they have all been locked up in high-security prisons, right? Unfortunately, it is not so.

In this book, Dr. Stout has done a great service for humanity in describing, persuasively and chillingly, the psychopaths that are among us. They can be anyone, from a successful and ruthless executive to the neighbor next door. Statistics shows that one in 25 people are psychopaths and they cannot be easily recognized even by experts.

What makes the psychopaths dangerous is that they have no conscience whatsoever. No remorse, no empathy, no emotion to constrain any of their acts even if the act causes great harm to their closest family members. And because of the same characteristics, they are often very successful in our society.

So pick up the book and read it now because chances are good that you will encounter a psychopath in your life. And what you don't know about them CAN hurt you. Also read "Political Ponerology" by Andrew Lobaczewski.

We are accustomed to think of sociopaths as violent criminals like Hannibal Lechter or Ted Bundy.

Martha Stout in this book reveals how a shocking 4 percent of the population have the same chief symptom, namely a complete lack of conscience. The difference is that the majority with this mental disposition operate within the laws and only rarely get caught.

The book is easy to read without having a psych degree and Martha Stout uses many examples to show how these people charm and deceive their way through life in total disregard for the impact on other people.

Martha Stout further teaches how to identify a sociopath and how to protect oneself from the impact of one.

I found the book clear and light and also a celebration of the 96% who do have a conscience.

The book is well worth reading along with "In sheeps clothing" by George Simon, "Political Ponerology" by Andrzej Lobaczewski, "The mask of sanity" by Hervey Checkley and "Without conscience" by Robert Hare, that all deal with different aspects of the phenomenon.

Recently, a number of books have appeared that identify a bracket of `people without conscience'. Among these we have Flipnosis, Without conscience, In sheep's clothing, alongside this book and several others. All of these books warn us that there are a proportion of evil people in society who feel no guilt, thus they become powerful manipulators who may or may not commit hideous crimes. We are presented with a number of profiles and then instructed to avoid contact with the beast as much as possible. The result is that we will scan down a mental checklist looking for these people, and our filters might be quite biased as we attempt to fit various people we have known into various brackets.

What a lot of this literature apparently fails to do is to identify the full complexity, gradations, and variations in the conditions described (except for Robert Hare's book, 'Without Conscience', which is a scholarly book that concentrates on real psychopaths).The people described in these books show a considerable variety of behaviours, and with a little reflection we can see that the situation is infinitely more subtle than we might at first think. Despite this, the sensationalism causes us to think in terms of polar extremes.

Martha Stout's book offers us a good look at the beast because she has worked with many of these people. Her knowledge enables her to very readably step inside the beast and narrate the kinds of thought processes that take place. This is done with such credibility that we almost empathise with the people under scrutiny. In fact, if she didn't also narrate the thoughts of the `normal' people inside these stories with equal skill we would probably feel rather uneasy about the author herself!

A message comes across in all of these books - and in most reviews of these books. Certain evil people see the possession of conscience as something that prevents the rest of us from getting what we really want, consequently they see conscience as a weakness that we have. They consider themselves to be above the laws and rules that govern the rest of us and hate being told what to do. Although they do not possess conscience themselves, they can gain a thorough understanding of the boundaries of conscience that govern the rest of us, hence they can become highly skilled at making other people feel guilty, and can use this skill to considerable effect. They become skilled manipulators who make people behave like puppets as they pull various strings.

Although capable of committing acts of extreme cruelty without remorse, most of these people would probably never go this far. Instead, these people will find that they can use their `power' to more productive effect elsewhere in society, and indeed they do. They might effectively bully their way right to the top. The range of options open to these people is, after all, rather large, running along a scale from murder at one end, through bodily harm, through fracturing, through intimidation, through manipulative story-telling, to verbal bullying at the mild end of the scale.

Maybe there are many gradations of conscience rather it being a simple matter of with or without. I would like to think so, and I would like to think that many of the unpleasant and manipulative people in this world DO have some moral standards. 4% without conscience? This means that I should know a dozen potential killers. I think not. Personally I think that the 'without conscience' bracket of people is actually very small, BUT, I think that the percentage of manipulative people is a lot bigger, and when you learn about the former, you will gain some insight into how the latter work. I think that different people set their moral boundaries at different threshholds, and that those with fewer scruples will tend to bully those who set about doing everything the socially correct way. My girlfriend has a highly manipulative boss, but we both agree that her boss has a conscience. When we are confronted with a real psychopath the danger is real, and obviously we have to avoid them. But I really believe that most manipulators are simply people who have found a set of behaviours that enable them to get what they want. No more: No less. In fact, rather than isolating the manipulator, could I suggest working from the other end - maybe some of us are too nice and others take advantage? However, if you know you are dealing with a psychopath I suggest you RUN.

Robert Hare's book, which is academic and completely credible, tells us that there are probably 100,000 psychopaths in New York City (population 8,214,426), which works out at about 1.2%, and he suggests that at some time in our lives (singular) we may well be at risk, either physically or financially. With this in mind, Martha stout's book is essential reading because it gives very readable accounts of the sort of risks we might face. Hare also warns that it is not for amateurs to try to give clinical assessments, so we should all avoid the temptation to label people unless we are fully qualified.