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Product Description
Product Description
Divorce is difficult under the best of circumstances. When your spouse has borderline personality disorder (BPD), narcissistic personality disorder (NPD), or is manipulative, divorcing can be especially complicated. While people with these tendencies may initially appearconvincing and even charming to lawyers and judges, you know better - many of these “persuasive blamers” leverage false accusations, attempt to manipulate others, launch verbal and physical attacks, and do everything they can to get their way. <B>Splitting</B> is your legal and psychological guide to safely navigating a high-conflict divorce from an unpredictable spouse. Written by Bill Eddy, a family lawyer, therapist, and divorce mediator, and Randi Kreger, coauthor of the BPD classic <B>Stop Walking on Eggshells</B>, this book includes all of the critical information you need to work through theprocess of divorce in an emotionally balanced, productive way. Turn to this guide to help you: <UL type=disc><BR> *Predict what your spouse may do or say in court<BR> - Take control of your case with assertiveness and strategic thinking<BR> - Choose a lawyer who understands your case<BR> - Learn how e-mails and social networking can be used against you
About the Author
'Bill Eddy, LCSW, JD' , has been a family lawyer for over eighteen years and a therapist for over twelve years. He is senior family mediator at the National Conflict Resolution Center in San Diego, CA, and president of the High Conflict Institute based in Scottsdale, AZ. He is a faculty member at Pepperdine University School of Law and the National Judicial College and has provided seminars to judges, lawyers, counselors, and others on the subject of managing high-conflict personalities in legal disputes. <p>Randi Kreger has brought the concerns of family members who have a loved one with BPD to an international forefront through her website, www.bpdcentral.com www.bpdcentral.com, and the Welcome to Oz online support community. Through Eggshells Press, she offers family members a wide variety of more specialized booklets and other materials. She was also instrumental in the formation of the Personality Disorders Awareness Network (PDAN), a not-for-profit organization. Kreger is author of The Stop Walking on Eggshells Workbook and <I>The Essential Family Member Guide to Borderline Personality Disorder</I>. She speaks and gives workshops about BPD internationally.</p>
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Most Helpful Customer Reviews on Amazon.com (beta)
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4.9 out of 5 stars (16 customer reviews)
52 of 52 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars
If three of the last five words in this title have meaning to you, get this book, it WILL save your life, July 17 2011
By ef - Published on Amazon.com
This review is from: Splitting: Protecting Yourself While Divorcing Someone with Borderline or Narcissistic Personality Disorder (Paperback)
Does your partner have periods of uncontrollable rage? Bizarre behaviors? A truly astonishing ability to twist words and reinterpret reality around you? Wild mood swings? Hair trigger temper? Have you been desperate enough that you spend your free time surreptitiously Google-ing psychological disorders to try to "poor mans diagnose" what you're dealing with?Clearly you have. If you're reading this, you're probably doing research Right Now in the vain hope of getting an answer to the one question you've been asking yourself night and day for as long as you can remember: What Do I Do?
If that sounds like you, get this book, it will save your life.
On second thought, clear your browser cache, erase cookies and search history, and beg a friend to buy this book for you so it does not get shipped to your home address. I'm not kidding. Read the title again.
23 of 24 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars
SPLITTING, July 23 2011
By Barbara - Published on Amazon.com
Amazon Verified Purchase(What's this?)
This review is from: Splitting: Protecting Yourself While Divorcing Someone with Borderline or Narcissistic Personality Disorder (Paperback)
After ordering Splitting from Amazon I was thrilled to receive this sooner than I thought. I have read it with great interest. This book gives you great insight into all aspects of breaking free from a person with a personality disorder. It actually gave me the strength inside on just how to tackle things in an efficient and practical way. It takes away the emotions. Gives you a clear understanding of what you are dealing with and because of this book, I have conversed brilliantly with my Lawyer. Worked with him and found my straightforward approach with facts, have strengthened my relationship with him. Due to this, we have worked together trustingly to bring closure before court. Hopefully this will be happening within a few days. Brilliant book. Would recommend it to anyone in a difficult breakup with Narcissistic and Borderline personalities. After reading it I also recognised that my ex had both. Well done for writing this book. Wished there was more awareness of this problem.
18 of 18 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars
Helps educate you to lower risks of arrest, abuse investigations from false allegations & help custody efforts, Sep 10 2011
By MarkA - Published on Amazon.com
Amazon Verified Purchase(What's this?)
This review is from: Splitting: Protecting Yourself While Divorcing Someone with Borderline or Narcissistic Personality Disorder (Paperback)
After having gone through the first years of post separation & divorce, I can definitely agree that PROTECTING YOURSELF is top priority when separating, especially if you have children. Educate yourself while quietly documenting the spouse's behaviors, quietly and confidentially seek the advice of a few family law attorneys who have experience with high conflict cases, carefully consider your options and prepare accordingly.Decades ago the hot-button threats by disordered spouses were claiming you were a closet homosexual or having an affair. These days such allegations are ho-hum and ignored in most courts. What has replaced them? Claims of DV (against the spouse) and child neglect, abuse or molestation. Why? To unfairly gain advantage or keep the upper hand in the court's custody and parenting decisions. Those are extreme hot-button issues and agencies are just waiting for a call to jump into action, this is the one time where the allegation is presumed valid at first and the presumption of innocence is set aside at first. An innocent spouse or parent (you) can be arrested and charged with some very serious offenses.
If your spouse has threatened to make false allegations in the past, then that means it has been contemplated and therefore you are at heightened risk. DO NOT FOOL YOURSELF THAT YOU ARE NOT AT RISK! William Eddy presents information that will help you to avoid many common presumptions, mistakes and pitfalls us Nice Guys and Nice Gals are likely to make when we first encounter the judicial (not justice) system. Sorry, but normal common sense does not apply in court and the truth does not always prevail. Courts, including family/domestic court, make decisions based on written laws, case law which has modified the application of written laws, and the latitude allowed for the case-by-case discretion by judges. That is why this book is so helpful, in addition to your family law attorney's legal advice.
To echo the excellent advice in another comment: If that sounds like you, get this book, it will save your life. On second thought, clear your browser cache, erase cookies and search history, and BEG a friend to buy this book for you so it does not get shipped to your home address or appear on your credit card or bank statements. I'm not kidding. Read the title again. PROTECT YOURSELF.
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