Stop Walking on Eggshells: Taking Your Life Back When Someone you Care About has Borderline Personality Disorder: Amazon.ca: Paul T. Mason, Randi Kreger: Books

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Review

Stop Walking on Eggshells makes good on its promise to restore the lives of people in close relationships with someone diagnosed with borderline personality disorder (BPD). It is a rich guide to understanding and coping with the reactions aroused in others by troubling BPD behaviors that negatively impact relationships. Readers will find this book very useful and beneficial.

--Nina W. Brown, Ed.D., professor and Eminent Scholar at Old Dominion University in Norfolk, VA, author of Children of the Self-Absorbed

This book is the absolute go-to guide for my clients who are dealing with a loved one with borderline personality disorder. Readable and thorough, it strikes a perfect balance of practical advice and emotional sensitivity. This book has helped so many people break through their sense of confusion and isolation by helping them to name, understand, and respond to the difficulties of this complex and misunderstood disorder.

--Daniel E. Mattila, M.Div., LCSW

This book is ur --This text refers to an alternate Paperback edition.

Book Description

Stop Walking On Eggshells is a self-help guide that helps the family members and friends of individuals with borderline personality disorder (BPD) understand this self-destructive condition and learn what they can do to cope with it and take care of themselves. It is designed to help them understand how the disorder affects their loved ones and recognize what they can do to get off the emotional roller coasters and take care of themselves.

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Inside This Book (Learn More)

First Sentence
Is someone you care about causing you a great deal of pain? Read the first page

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Front Cover | Copyright | Table of Contents | Excerpt

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Customer Reviews

79 Reviews

5 star:		(61)
4 star:		(7)
3 star:		(1)
2 star:		(2)
1 star:		(8)

Average Customer Review

4.4 out of 5 stars (79 customer reviews)

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34 of 34 people found the following review helpful

5.0 out of 5 stars Excellent book, realistic and balanced, Jun 29 2004

By A Customer

This review is from: Stop Walking on Eggshells: Taking Your Life Back When Someone you Care About has Borderline Personality Disorder (Paperback)

This excellent book has quite understandably received 5-star reviews from most readers. This is because it does a superb job in explaining borderline personality disorder (BPD), and suggesting strategies for coping with the borderline in your life.

I am writing this review to take issue with one of the few negative reviews: "Worthless and harmful", by Ospawno. This reviewer felt that the book (1) is "incredibly simplistic"; (2) "lacks a sound foundation in clinical research" and (3) actually just encourages "the "non" borderline to feel justified in dumping their borderline partner". All three charges are unfounded.

The book is written in an easy-to-read style; Ospawno says that the authors seem to have believed "that most reading it possess an fifth grade education". Wake up, Ospawno, half of the people in the USA basically do possess the equivalent of a fifth grade education! Guess what, many of them have to deal with BPD in their lives too! The language is simple, the concepts are not, and they are well explained.

Secondly, to the extent that the book deals with the characteristics of BPD, it remains well in touch with the DSM definition of the disorder at all times and is thus clinically well grounded. Ospawno's vague academic ramblings about "cluster B traits" and whatnot are irrelevant. Based on my experience and on the experience of hundreds if not thousands of people with BPD in their lives, the depiction of the disorder in this book is spot on.

Thirdly, the claim that the book just encourages the "non"-BPD partner to dump the BPD partner is the most unfair of all. About two thirds of the book, from pp. 85-220, is about how to deal with BPD on a day-to-day basis. Ospawno finds this advice "vague and ambiguous", but frankly, I would like to see him do a better job. BPD is not easy to live with. On the message boards run by one of the authors you will see people trying to deal with the disorder, and you will sometimes see what Ospawno calls "vindictive folks spewing vitriolic hate against their ex". If he had any actual knowledge of what it's like to live with BPD, he would understand that this is a pretty natural reaction in some cases. It's not a consequence of reading this book, which is most of the time more kind to the borderline than I would be inclined to be myself. Rather, it's a consequence of living with BPD, which Ospawno clearly knows nothing about.

In short, the book is not "worthless and harmful", it is valuable and life-affirming. If you have someone with BPD in your life, this book will give you the knowledge to address your situation in whatever way you decide is best.

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10 of 10 people found the following review helpful

5.0 out of 5 stars Living with a BPD is different then reading about them..., Jun 26 2004

By

Garrett E. Johnson "garrett_johnson" (Stockton, California United States) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)

This review is from: Stop Walking on Eggshells: Taking Your Life Back When Someone you Care About has Borderline Personality Disorder (Paperback)

Living with a BPD is different then reading about them, but not in this book. I consulted with "experts" about my former spouse who has BPD their impressions are MUCH different then the actual experience. When seeking counseling I was blamed for her outrageous behavior, as anyone who has lived with a BPD they begin their formation at very early ages. The book was surprising in the honestly from those recovering from BPD. While married to a BPD I heard the "real story" behind many of the events of her childhood (from her) those events were never discussed as honestly in front of counselors. This book was both illuminating and liberating to finally hear groups of people echoing my own experiences. Even the frank quotations read like a script of my marriage it left me feeling like the problem was so thoroughly understood that it left me no more question in my mind about my own sanity. If someone you love has ever threatened to kill themselves, cut themselves, if you have had a conversation with that person and felt like "was I really there when we talked about this?", or if you have been arrested 3-4 times without knowing why until the court date, you really need to buy this book.

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3 of 3 people found the following review helpful

4.0 out of 5 stars The 3 books you MUST read to get a full picture of BPD, Jan 1 2004

By A Customer

This review is from: Stop Walking on Eggshells: Taking Your Life Back When Someone you Care About has Borderline Personality Disorder (Paperback)

For consumers:

1) "Lost in the mirror" to validate the suffering of someone with BPD
2) "The Siren's Dance : My Marriage to a Borderline: A Case Study" to validate what the partner of someone with BPD goes through.
3) "Stop Walking on Eggshells; Coping When Someone You Care about Has Borderline Personality Disorder" as a blueprint of how loved ones can deal with the condition.

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Most recent customer reviews

5.0 out of 5 stars Tip toe around the egg shells
The book is well balanced and is really good at showing how the Borderline person thinks and feels, and why. Read more

Published 9 days ago by Ken

5.0 out of 5 stars STOP WALKING ON EGGSHELLS
I purchased two of these books,Both as gifts, One for my sister who's son has BPD and one for my best friend who's brother has BPD... Read more

Published 6 months ago by Karma