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Most helpful customer reviews
9 of 9 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars
Best parenting book for frustrated parents,
By "aschroeder13" (High Point, NC USA) - See all my reviews
This review is from: How To Talk So Kids Will Listen & Listen So Kids Will Talk (Paperback)
My mother-in-law, who is a child psychologist, introduced me to this book. She's been using it for years in her practice. I have been irritated by other books that seem to talk exclusively about how to help children while ignoring parents' needs. This book has great real-life examples and doesn't come down on stressed out parents for getting angry or saying dumb things. Instead, it gives practical exercises and rules for helping your relationship. Some of them are hard to do. Habits are hard to change. But it has made a world of difference between me and my 3-year-old. I'm so glad to have read this book so early in her life. I think it will spare us some of the heartache my mother and I experienced, mostly due to poor communication skills.
4.0 out of 5 stars
Excellent,
By
This review is from: How To Talk So Kids Will Listen & Listen So Kids Will Talk (Paperback)
Original book. The cartoons make the book an easy and quick read. Good information. The book covers many scenarios with your kids and provides insightfdul hints.
10 of 11 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars
Talking To Feelings With Just the Right Words...WORKS!,
By A reader (Atlanta, GA) - See all my reviews
This review is from: How To Talk So Kids Will Listen & Listen So Kids Will Talk (Paperback)
Although this best selling book was originally written more than 20 years ago, I find the advice and specific suggestions extremely on target in 2004. The main strategy that has made such a positive difference in my life is to acknowlege my child's feelings before I give the direction for compliance. Most of the time, I do try to give well-meaning, honest (not always calm) responses to my 3-year-old that unfortunately sometimes escalate into a raging tantrum or no win power struggle such as in the following example at bedtime...My son announced, "I'm really scared of the big closet monster, Mommy." I responded honestly, "There's nothing to be scared about, there is no such thing as a real monster. Monsters are just make believe."...This conversation was followed by a long screamimg and kicking fit from a very tired, frustrated little boy. Now I have learned that by calmly talking to my son's feelings first, he knows that his point of view is understood and important to me. Then I have a better chance of getting him to stay in his bed. Because I chose to validate his feelings first, I got the cooperation I was after. I learned to say, "I see how worried you are...I've got a great idea...I'm getting the broom out to sweep the entire floor including every corner of your closet to make sure nothing is hiding in there...OK, it's completely empty, honey...only clothes in here. Hop in bed and I'll rub you back before our special good night kiss." ...It worked like a charm! I also highly recommend another newer pocket-sized book to accompany this classic tome called "The Pocket Parent." It is based on the very same philosophy of Haim Ginott and is chock full of hundreds of quick read tips and funny, true, short anecdotes from moms and dads relating to the challenging behaviors of 2-5 year olds (anger, bad words, bedtime and mealtime refusals, sibling fights, interrupting, whining and many more). These 2 books have taught me and my husband so many techniques that have worked at least once. We continue to refer to them for specific sensible strategies (including the exact words to try on our son). We appreciate the upbeat tone and great sense of humor of both books. Additionally, FYI...both parenting books have been translated into Spanish and are both available through amazon.com.
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