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But, what the Sear's approach or Attachment Parenting approach to me comes down to this:
Know your baby.
Respond to your baby's cues.
Understand that your baby isn't a mini-adult who just happens to live in a diaper. Understand that your child comes with his own personality and developmental timetable. Understand that when he cries he needs you. Understand that cuddling, holding, touching your baby is good for him and is not "spoiling" him. Understand that being given a brand new soul to nurture can be exhausting, but that everything you do which demonstrates empathy will come back to you 10 fold in the bond you will have with your child.
I do wish that the AP "movement" was less associated with "crunchy granola" types of parents. AP (and the Sears as the best known proponents) is really doing what comes naturally: We are hardwired to pick up our babies and care for them when they cry. We are hardwired to feel the intense desire to protect them from discomfort. This isn't a "movement" this is how we are made, and Mother (and Father) Nature are brillant!
Unfortunately, I didn't buy this book until after my first child was born and I was having problems breastfeeding and getting him to sleep in his crib (and getting no rest myself in the process). I believe that if I had I read this book before my son was born, I would have had a much easier first couple of months. I used much of the advice in the book when my daughter was born and can say that her infancy brought us much more enjoyment and relaxation.
Yes, Dr. Sears is a breastfeeding, cosleeping, and attachment parenting advocate, but I consider him in expert in these areas. I much preferred the helpful breastfeeding advice in this book to the damaging breastfeeding advice I found in the What to Expect books. I welcomed Dr. Sears' comments that letting my child sleep with me wouldn't cause the psychological harm and bad habits that the What to Expect books lectured me about.
No, I'm not an attachment parent or a stay-at-home mom. I've used more formula than I'd like to admit. However, I found this book useful and informative and not at all "preachy."
I've given this book to several expectant mothers and have always been sincerely thanked.
This book covers EVERYTHING you need to know about taking care of an infant, including day-to-day things like bathing, feeding, burping, to major and minor medical situatations. My husband and I find this book very reassuring when, in the middle of the night, our newborn is acting strange or when we get lots of unasked for advice and we second-guess our parenting.
Frankly, I don't understand the criticism that says that the Sears preach an all-or-nothing method that makes parents feel guilty. The Sears do promote attachment parenting but they don't believe that "sharing sleep" is necessry for every family. They specifically write that each family is different and has to find what works best for them. There is an extensive section on how to continue breastfeeding if you are going back to work and how to make formula feeding a positive experience, if you feed with formula.
Give this book a read and form your own opinion. I am so glad that I did!