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...helps parents regain control of their children and their families. (Washington Times )
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Most helpful customer reviews
9 of 9 people found the following review helpful
2.0 out of 5 stars
"Take no prisoners" approach,
By "victorlei" (Haifa, Israel) - See all my reviews
This review is from: The Defiant Child: A Parent's Guide to Oppositional Defiant Disorder (Paperback)
The book describes what parents of ODD kids experience every day. Mr. Riley's suggestions are easily understood and seem natural. The book is easy to read. Then why I did not give it five stars?If you consider buying this book, you probably already tried setting limits, star programs, timeouts, 1-2-3, and many other variations of dog training. You tried and found that both "motivation" and warnings are ignored, and that punishment only fuels more resentment. Now you are stuck, but there is a hope -- Mr. Riley comes with new ideas for better, more severe and more painful punishment; of course all within the limits of the law. You are big and smart, and there are many ways to cause pain to your child without spanking. For example, you could explain that YOU own everything in your home and will take it away if he misbehaves. So, what's wrong with the book? First, the style. Mr. Riley speaks in a very distant, detached voice as if he is not talking about our children, but of some other species: evil, smart, and obviously very dangerous. My first reaction to the book was entirely intuitive -- its ice-cold style FELT wrong. Second, the perception of the real problem. Whey you say "dress up now, we got to go", and your 8 year old answers with "F--- YOU", is it because you need more "parental authority", or because he is lacking some very basic skills needed for everyday life? And if your child is as evil and smart as the book suggests, why his life is such a hell? If you think you have to win the war with your child, no matter what it takes -- this book is for you. If you want to teach your child the skills needed for everyday survival, try reading "The Explosive Child". I made my choice, now it's your turn.
2 of 2 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars
Helped me get started!!!,
By "mooncat_noir" (Dallas, Texas) - See all my reviews
This review is from: The Defiant Child: A Parent's Guide to Oppositional Defiant Disorder (Paperback)
I am a stepfather and married into a package deal: long lost love, defiant teenager. While I was no professional, I knew that there was something terribly wrong with this childs world view and decision making. At times, the anger and open defiance seemed totally nonsensical. I read The Defiant Child and found a GOOD description of my stepchild as well as practical steps you can take to influence the child in positive ways. I had a thoroughly defeated wife who was convinced nothing would work. My having her read the book, she came out of her paralysis and we were able to develop a united front (essential) and started effecting some changes. Our daughter is still no angel but she is sure easier to cope with now. She is even enjoyable at times. You just have to arm yourself with knowledge, patience and love and keep pressing. I found the books insights very helpful and I used them as guidelines in developing my own strategies. I was so impressed with the results that I've gotten, I have GIVEN the book to other "burned out" parents and they love it too. Douglas Riley was a Godsend.
5.0 out of 5 stars
Let's you know you are not alone,
By
This review is from: The Defiant Child: A Parent's Guide to Oppositional Defiant Disorder (Paperback)
Our family has been dealine with an ODD child for many years. I was thrilled when I found this book. The author's first hand experiences with the children let me know that mine was not the only child like this. I found his writing very readable and his suggestions very useful and concrete. I highly recommend this book to every parent I meet up with that is dealing with this disorder.
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