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The Discipline Book: Everything You Need to Know to Have a Better-Behaved Child : For Birth to Age Ten Hardcover – Feb 22 1995

48 customer reviews

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Product Details

  • Hardcover: 328 pages
  • Publisher: Little Brown, USA (Feb. 22 1995)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0316779040
  • ISBN-13: 978-0316779043
  • Product Dimensions: 3.2 x 20.3 x 24.8 cm
  • Shipping Weight: 839 g
  • Average Customer Review: 3.8 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (48 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Bestsellers Rank: #594,303 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
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Inside This Book

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First Sentence
HOW DO PARENTS get children to do the things they want them to do - and to want to do those things? Read the first page
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Front Cover | Copyright | Table of Contents | Excerpt | Index | Back Cover
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Customer Reviews

3.8 out of 5 stars

Most helpful customer reviews

12 of 13 people found the following review helpful By Julie Francis on April 18 2004
Format: Paperback
I was so thrilled about all I learned from the Sears Baby Book, that I was sure this was the only discipline book I'd need. Instead, I just read it and it is going straight into the trash (and yes, I read the whole huge thing, hoping at some point it would get better and more useful) Dr. Sears, you hae a lot of fans out there (myself included) but you really missed the boat on this one! The book goes on and on and on about attachment parenting philosophies (wear your baby, nurse, sleep with your baby) and even though I've done all that I find this book does the attachment parenting thing ad nauseum. I actually found myself thinking it is a bit offensive, because Sears seems to think that children who are properly attached, or attached enough, will not have discipline issues. Well, that's just not helpful to me as I try to find strategies to deal with my daughter hitting other children, or throwing food on the floor (for 4 months now), or having little tantrums, etc. If you want a book that will make you feel good about all the great attachment parenting you've done, or horrible about all the attachment parenting you haven't done, then this is the book for you. If you want a book that is more about strategies to deal with toddlers and their behavioral challenges (and why they work, and the strenghts and weaknesses of various approaches), keep looking. I'm going to try "Secrets of the Baby Whisperer for toddlers" and "Becoming the parent you want to be."
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2 of 2 people found the following review helpful By A Customer on March 22 1998
Format: Paperback
We bought this book because the reviews called it "essential" but we found it to be useless when we tried to put its ideas into practice. The authors do detail problems and offer solutions but their advice is actually quite vague. We bought the book to try to get some help but following the advice in the book just made us frustrated. They don't have suggestions for people like us, whose discipline issues aren't as pat as those in the book. For parents who are starting out, this might be a helpful book to read but for us, whose problems are more established, the book really wasn't any help at all.
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6 of 7 people found the following review helpful By Michelle on Feb. 25 2000
Format: Paperback
I am a strong believer in the general ideas espoused by Dr. Sears (family bed, avoiding spanking, being respectful of children as people, etc.), but I found this book very disappointing. First, Dr. Sears provides many strong recommendations about what a parent should and shouldn't do, but virtually no practical suggestions or examples. Second, in the focus on being respectful and responsive to the child, there is a strong implication that a parent who attends to his/her own needs is practicing poor parenting. I believe that a parent who sacrifices too much of her/his self is often a worse parent than those who have boundaries that are respectful of BOTH themselves and their child. Third, there is a strong and explicit value that the mother is and SHOULD be the primary parent, with the father playing a quite peripheral role. If you want a parenting book that teaches you to be warm and responsive to your child with practical examples, "How to Talk So Kids Will Listen, How to Listen So Kids Will Talk" is a MUCH better choice.
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5 of 6 people found the following review helpful By A Customer on Sept. 16 2003
Format: Paperback
I feel so comfortable with the philosophy of this book. I must admit I had previously thought of attachment parenting as relating only to nursing babies. Sears clearly explains that a solid foundation in a "connected parent/child relationship" along with firm boundaries, effective communication skills and behavior modification strategies, will (over time) develop a child's
conscience and internal motivation to WANT to do the right thing. I have 3 young children under the age of 6. I highly recommend this book for it's comprehesive explanations of theory and attention to issues of special needs children as well as to some common worrisome issues of 6-10 year olds. If you have young children like me, I also recommend a very practical A-Z guide called "The Pocket Parent" that is written only for parents of 2-5 year olds. This literally pocketsized book is not written in paragraphs, but rather sanity saving bullets of quick read tips and examples often including the exact words to try. It is organized alphabetically by behavior topic (anger, biting, gimmes, hitting, listening, lying, morning crazies, whining, etc) and can quickly suggest a strategy at a moments notice. I refer to these 2 compatible books again and again. I am pleased with the increase of cooperation from my kids as well as the general feeling of well-being in my household.(...of course, that's on a good day!...My kids are normal and often quite challenging!)
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By A Customer on June 15 2002
Format: Paperback
If I were to recommend only one discipline book, it would be The Discipline Book. I first encountered it when I was trying to help my sister deal with her 3-year-old's severe behavior problems. While other reviewers report frustration at the lack of "specifics," I found this book extremely practical. It gave my sister and I the tools we needed to effect immediate change in my niece's behavior and, because of the attachment philosophy, her well-being too.
This is how we applied the information in The Discipline Book: my niece had been literally attacking other children in her day care, but she was much better-behaved at home. After reading through the book it seemed to us that she was probably not feeling secure with her mother, since children will tend to be worse-behaved with the persons they trust the most. Talking with her daycare attendants revealed that her acting out started shortly after her mother made the decision to enter the Army. A discussion with my niece then revealed that she thought when her mother went into the Army, my niece would be left home alone to take care of herself. A few days of consistent reassurance that she would not be abandoned, combined with plenty of affection, eliminated the behavior problem.
So, I found the book to be extremely practical; and I have since effectively used its principles in caring for other children. Although the authors do not focus on particular situations, they enable caregivers to understand a child's own experience of behavioral problems and to compassionately address the underlying concerns. While not all discipline involves behaviors as complicated as the one I described, all effective discipline does require compassionate and empathic parenting. The Discipline Book gives caregivers the tools required for this sort of effective, humane disciplining.
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