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The Disease to Please: Curing the People-Pleasing Syndrome Paperback – Mar 6 2002


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The Disease to Please: Curing the People-Pleasing Syndrome + Who's Pulling Your Strings?: How to Break the Cycle of Manipulation and Regain Control of Your Life + Too Nice for Your Own Good: How to Stop Making 9 Self-Sabotaging Mistakes
Price For All Three: CDN$ 41.79


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Product Details

  • Paperback: 288 pages
  • Publisher: McGraw-Hill; 1 edition (March 6 2002)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0071385649
  • ISBN-13: 978-0071385640
  • Product Dimensions: 15.5 x 2.3 x 22.9 cm
  • Shipping Weight: 458 g
  • Average Customer Review: 4.2 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (8 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Bestsellers Rank: #76,801 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
  • See Complete Table of Contents

Product Description

From the Publisher

 New York Times Advice Bestseller; Hardcover edition sold over 25,000 copies  Hardcover was excerpted in Working Woman and was author was featured on The Today Show  Oprah Winfrey continues to speak about the need to cure her “disease to please.”  Case study illustrations from Braiker’s extensive clinical experience working with both men and women who suffer from various aspects of the Disease to Please.  The book will also include a People Pleaser Quiz to help readers identify their people pleaser tendencies.

From the Back Cover

What's wrong with being a "people pleaser?" Plenty!

"A fascinating book... If you struggle with where, when, and how to draw the line between your own desires and the demands of others, buy this book!"­­Kay Redfield Jamison, bestselling author of An Unquiet Mind and Night Falls Fast

People pleasers are not just nice people who go overboard trying to make everyone happy. Those who suffer from the Disease to Please are people who say "Yes" when they really want to say "No." For them, the uncontrollable need for the elusive approval of others is an addiction. Their debilitating fears of anger and confrontation force them to use "niceness" and "people-pleasing" as self-defense camouflage.

Featured on NBC's "Today," The Disease to Please explodes the dangerous myth that "people pleasing" is a benign problem. Best-selling author and frequent "Oprah" guest Dr. Harriet Braiker offers clear, positive, practical, and easily do-able steps toward recovery.

Begin with a simple but revealing quiz to discover what type of people-pleaser you are. Then learn how making even small changes to any single portion of the Disease to Please Triangle - involving your thoughts, feelings, and behavior - will cause a dramatic, positive and long-lasting change to the overall syndrome.

As a recovered peoplepleaser, you will finally see that a balanced way of living that takes others into consideration but puts the emphasis first on pleasing yourself and gaining your own approval is the clearest path to health and happiness.


Inside This Book (Learn More)
First Sentence
If you are like most people-pleasers, you probably already know the answer to this question. Read the first page
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Customer Reviews

4.2 out of 5 stars
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Most helpful customer reviews

3 of 3 people found the following review helpful By Diana M. Rodriguez on Aug. 7 2002
Format: Hardcover
I have recommended this book to so many people. I only hope that whoever reads it will follow the message.
This is an important book. I think it is a critical read for anyone who has been abused, used or taken advantage of. It is important for the individual to understand why and how they got to be in the position and how they aquired the "Disease to Please".
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By Rolf Dobelli on Oct. 17 2001
Format: Hardcover
Why do some people try so hard to please others that end up pleasing no one - including themselves? Harriet B. Braiker anchors this phenomenon in early childhood problems, such as guilt or low self-esteem, and shows how it harms adult relationships, including those at work. Although she emphasizes interpersonal relationships off the job, executives, managers and employees at all levels will still find her book helpful in life and in work. Braiker describes three primary manifestations (compulsive behavior, distorted thinking, and avoidance of negative feelings) of being a people-pleaser, and notes that this problem can stem from a personal mind-set, a habit or an intense aversion to conflict. Most helpfully, she explains strategies for more productive behavior. Sometimes the explanations and self-help quizzes become repetitive, but her examples keep the book's pace flowing. Thus we [...] recommend this book as - dare we say it? - a real crowd pleaser.
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By Ron Kehn on Feb. 28 2011
Format: Paperback
This book is a truely inspiring learning experience, for those of us that try to do it all, putting ourselves after every body else. I found it a very good awakening to my behaviour of trying to make everyone happy before taking care of my needs. In fact I felt that taking care of everyone else was my primary need, untill I read this book andrealized that it is important to take care of yourself first, or at least that you the choice of saying NO if you want to.
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Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
Another excellent book by Harriet Braiker, Ph. D. She provides practical advice on how to be more self assured and how to stop being a "people pleaser". Very readable, very good book! Highly recommended!
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