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1.0 out of 5 stars
What Did I Just Watch?!, Mar 6 2004
This review is from: The Foreigner (DVD)
THE FOREIGNER is a film telling the story of...uh...um...that is to say the basic plot of THE FOREIGNER involves...um...oh, forget it, I give up! This movie makes no sense at all! It's one of Seagal's all time worst. He super sleepwalks through this one. In THE GODFATHER Marlon Brando stuffed his cheeks with cotton to make his jaw line appear a little different and his voice sound a little rougher. It looks as though Seagal tried the same aproach for THE FOREIGNER, but took it a couple steps too far and shoved entire cones of cotton candy into his mouth. He mumbles horrendously throughout the entire picture making most of his dialogue incomprehensible. This is extremely unfortunate as there's A LOT of the usual Seagal direct-to-video post-production voice-over-style acting in this one with Seagal obviously recording most of his monotonous monologue and dialogue later on from the comfortable chairs of a sound booth. For those interested in watching Seagal movies solely for the fights, this is also not the movie for you. He has only one big showdown here which doesn't last long and which can best be described as Steven Seagal plays patt-a-cake below the standards of physical coordination set by toddlers who practice the game. Stay away unless you're a true diehard fan and simply MUST see everything Seagal does. For others, this is the pits!
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2.0 out of 5 stars
Typical but not horrible, Jan 24 2004
This review is from: The Foreigner (DVD)
Well i will say this movie stunk but i won't say it was all that horrible,much better than the rediculous Out for a Kill,uhh didnt we already have OUT for justice?Anyhow this is the typical package delivery,look out bad guy's,big conspiracy movie.Yes is pretty bad but it could have been a lot better,spice up the plot and instead of Steven using ALL gun's in this movie,let him use his much skilled martial arts talent.This is backwards,take all the fighting from Out for a Kill and put it here and it would be so much better.Oh well can't win them all,and by the way give up the cheesy new age music,and slow motion reverse fighting shots,let the man just fight for god sakes.
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1.0 out of 5 stars
If you like Seagal don't see this one..., Jan 24 2004
Ever see those BMW commercials on TV that were continued on the internet? They kind of had a story tying together the car chases and action and were about a minute long. Well this movie like them but 90 minutes too long. I like Seagal and he did make fun, interesting action packed movies. Unfortunately this one, along with so many other of his recent movies just plain sucks. The story is muddled and worthless and the ridiculous violence is just stupid. I like Seagal for action but this is beyond awful. The villians seem to kill everyone with a speaking part except their target, Seagal! 2 typical scenes - Man to Hotel Clerk Man: I'm looking for a friend (shows pic) Clerk: He's upstairs I'll ring him. There's no answer. Man: Alright then (Bang,Bang shoots clerk) 2 Men in Gas Station: Man 1: Hey You!Where'd you get that car, it's not yours! Man 2: Yes it is I bought it from some guy about an hour ago! Man 1: You dumb Mutha (Bang, Bang!) Regarding the stylish and slick cinematography and the music, I quote the Great Philosopher Butthead, "You can't polish a turd".
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