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The Introvert Advantage: Making the Most of Your Inner Strengths
 
 

The Introvert Advantage: Making the Most of Your Inner Strengths [Paperback]

Marti Olsen Laney
4.1 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (42 customer reviews)
List Price: CDN$ 18.95
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Product Description

Product Description

At least one out of four people prefers to avoid the limelight, tends to listen more than they speak, feels alone in large groups, and requires lots of private time to restore their energy. They're introverts, and here is the book to help them boost their confidence while learning strategies for successfully living in an extrovert world. After dispelling common myths about introverts-they're not necessarily shy, aloof, or antisocial--The Introvert Advantage explains the real issues. Introverts are hardwired from birth to focus inward, so outside stimulation-chitchat, phone calls, parties, office meetings-can easily become "too much." The Introvert Advantage dispels introverts' belief that something is wrong with them and instead helps them recognize their inner strengths-their analytical skills, ability to think outside the box, and strong powers of concentration. It helps readers understand introversion and shows them how to determine where they fall on the introvert/extrovert continuum. It provides tools to improve relationships with partners, kids, colleagues, and friends, offering dozens of tips, including 10 ways to talk less and communicate more, 8 ways to showcase your abilities at work, how to take a child's temperament temperature, and strategies for socializing. Finally, it shows how to not just survive, but thrive-how to take advantage of the introvert's special qualities to create a life that's just right for the introvert temperament, to discover new ways to expand their energy reserves, and even how, when necessary, to confidently become a temporary extrovert.

About the Author

Marti Olsen Laney, Psy.D., is a researcher, educator, author, and psychotherapist. One of Americas foremost authorities on introversion, she speaks and leads workshops on the topic in the United States and Canada. She and her extroverted husband have two grown daughters and four grandchildren. They live in Portland, Oregon.

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Customer Reviews

42 Reviews
5 star:
 (23)
4 star:
 (7)
3 star:
 (8)
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Average Customer Review
4.1 out of 5 stars (42 customer reviews)
 
 
 
 
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15 of 15 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Quiet Reflection on a Noisy Planet, Sep 4 2003
By 
Rebecca Johnson "The Rebecca Review" (Washington State) - See all my reviews
(TOP 500 REVIEWER)    (REAL NAME)   
This review is from: The Introvert Advantage: Making the Most of Your Inner Strengths (Paperback)
"Introverts are like a rechargeable battery. They need to stop expending energy and rest in order to recharge. Extroverts are like solar panels that need the sun to recharge. Extroverts need to be out and about to refuel." ~Marti Olsen Laney

Imagine feeling alone in a crowd, preferring a quiet corner to the limelight and feeling overwhelmed by phones, parties and office meetings. Do people often think you are shy, aloof or antisocial? If you are an introvert, you are going to completely relate to a variety of comments that are like fireworks going off in recognition of truth. Introverts can hide their talents and only show them in certain situations.

Through reading this wonderful and often humorous book, you will be assured that nothing is wrong with you. In fact, there is a connection between Introversion and Intelligence.

What is fascinating is how Marti Olsen Laney explains how introverts create energy in the opposite way extroverts do. I'm often drained of all energy after being with people for extended periods of time, but being with a book can set me on fire with creativity and energy. I can handle small groups and connecting with familiar faces can actually energize me, but after three hours, I want to find a more peaceful setting.

This book helped me understand why I have deeper thoughts when I'm by myself than in a group setting. People seem to not know who I am in the "real-world," but online, I have found a place to show my true self. This is apparently because introverts are more comfortable with writing than speaking in public.

Are You an Introvert?

Are you detail oriented yet details in public spaces overwhelm you?
Do you prefer small parties with intimate friends?
Do you avoid crowds?
Would you rather be reading books in bed in your pajamas?
Do you get tired when you are around people, but energized when alone?
Do you feel guilty about having to "limit" your social experiences so you can survive?

Does your mind sometimes go blank in group situations?
Do you dislike being interrupted in the middle of a project?

The author has divided her comments into three main sections. First you find out if you really are an introvert, then you discover how to navigate the extrovert world. The last section explains how you can create the perfect life by "extroverting." This is just another way of saying that an introvert can also shine their light out into the world.

After reading the list of famous introverts, you will see similarities in their personalities. The author also gives a list of movies to add to your "must-see" list. Marti also spends time seeking the in-depth answers to brain chemistry. You will also find out if you are a Right or Left-Brained Introvert.

Then onward to "dating." The "Relationships: Face the Music and Dance" chapter shows how personality types collide, how to meet the challenge and then how to appreciate the differences. Even by reading the chapter on Parenting, I started to understand extroverts in a new way. I find extroverts to be fascinating, yet at times they overwhelm my cozy-sit-in-the-corner cat nature with their tiger tactics. Extroverts just seem so aggressive at times. The world can look a little threatening and a party can be overwhelming.

I love the author's ideas about how to be a sea anemone at a party. I've survived many parties with this tactic. If you are worried about what to say at a party, Marti gives plenty of solutions in the form of openers, sustainers, transitions and closers. Then she dives into the hazards from 9 to 5. This chapter will also shed some light on your personal relationships. Ok, by the time I read "Pack Your Survival Kit" this book had been more than helpful. These tips alone will encourage you to create a more peaceful planet.

"The Introvert Advantage" is an encouraging book for anyone who has felt the pain of being an introvert in an extrovert world. Marti Olsen Laney also shows how it can be equally painful and unfulfilling to remain in a state of seclusion. Through reading thoughtful segments on a daily basis, you can finally start to find balance in your daily existence.

This is a must-read book for all Introverts and the people who love them. The author has a comfortable writing style and you will feel "at home" and find yourself "completely" relating to her experiences. It is rare to find a book where you just fall in love with an author's personality. She is cute, witty and intellectual too. Finally someone out there understands! The author has really done her research.

Highly recommended. Add this book to your Top Ten must-read books this year. After all, it will help you understand 25% of the population.

~The Rebecca Review.com, A Right-brained "mostly" Introvert (INFP) and proud of it.

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14 of 14 people found the following review helpful
3.0 out of 5 stars Please don't understand me too quickly, May 28 2003
By A Customer
This review is from: The Introvert Advantage: Making the Most of Your Inner Strengths (Paperback)
I agree with those reviewers who complained that the author too often confuses introversion with shyness or even various types of social phobia.
I am an introvert among introverts and repeatedly score as far into introversion as one can get on the MBTI and other scales, so I know whereof I speak.
Contrary to what Marti Olsen Laney says, we introverts don't want extroverts to ask us for our opinions. In most situations, we prefer to listen and analyze, but when we have something to say, we will pontificate on it ad nauseum, which is why most academics, scientists and researchers are introverts.
We also don't prefer to socialize in small groups. We actually like being in large groups because then we are not forced to speak when we'd rather observe and listen. (We can get happily lost in a crowd.)
And God save us from those well-meaning souls who feel they are doing us introverts a favor by "drawing [us] out."
We prefer formality and value our privacy. We'll thank you to respect that.
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20 of 23 people found the following review helpful
2.0 out of 5 stars Looking for more information and less self-help, April 30 2003
By 
Andrew R. Rowe (San Luis Obispo, CA United States) - See all my reviews
This review is from: The Introvert Advantage: Making the Most of Your Inner Strengths (Paperback)
I was hoping for a book that would help me understand why I am introverted. About the first quarter of the book did an ok job of doing this. It briefly delves into genetics, neurobiology, and the chemicals in our bodies that make introverts different from extroverts. This can help introverts see why we enjoy time alone so much.

The next three quarters of the book are a bit comical. It's full of self-help suggestions on how to adapt to the outside "extrovert world". Here are a few examples of what the author feels could help you to relax:

"Drink a cup of tea or a glass of water with a few drops of lemon juice in it"
"Look at a funny website"
"Break out of your routine and do something backward"
"Make cookies and take them to the office or give them to your child's class"

This is the general theme of the book for the last 200 pages! I don't need tips on how to help me deal with life. If you still haven't figured out how to live in the "extrovert world" at this point in your life then you have problems far beyond what this book can do for you.

Perhaps I should have done more research on what this book was really about before I bought it, and that is my fault. I'm just trying to warn those like me that may have been misled. Here's and easy way see if this book is or isn't for you:
Do you watch Oprah and Dr. Phil? - This book is for you.
Do you think watching Oprah and Dr. Phil is for weak-minded people who can't understand themselves well enough to find solutions to their problems on their own? - This book is not for you.

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