The Manipulative Man: Identify His Behavior, Counter the Abuse, Regain Control [Paperback]

When my marriage was falling apart, I quite literally wondered if I was going crazy. Everyone loved my husband. Even my parents loved him. I felt as if perhaps maybe there was something intrinsically wrong with the way I was feeling. My husband was so passive, and non aggressive that I began feeling as if I was the one that was the problem.

This book was like a breath of fresh air. I was not crazy for being frustrated with a man who always had an excuse for why he couldn't do what he promised he was going to do. I was not crazy for being angry at him when he refused to make a decision or follow through. In fact, my anger and frustration were appropriate responses, and my depression was just the result of me talking myself into the notion that I had no right to be angry or frustrated by such a 'nice passive' man.

My husband wasn't violent. In fact he was so passive, I sometimes wondered if he cared about anything at all. It was like living with a wet sponge.

The MM taught me to recognize extreme passiveness as a sign of manipulation and control. His passiveness controlled everything. I just didn't see it, because I had been conditioned to think manipulative men were more obvious and aggressive than he was.

MM helped me detach from blaming myself, in spite of what even my family thought about my decisions. It was a valuable tool on my road to recovery.

It not only helped me to recognize my ex husbands behavior as disrespectful and manipulative, but it also taught me to be on the look out for other types of manipulative men as well. Girls, this is a must read!!!! This book is like a manual for self care...You must be willing to look at yourself and what you are attracting into your life as well. You must be willing to take accountability for the way you think, and ultimately for your decisions to keep the men you do, in your life.

I highly recommend this book...

This book is a must read for anyone who has found themself in a relationship and second guessed their own sanity. I found myself glued to each chapter, seeing red-flags and finding answers to questions that I would not dare ask anyone. This is a great reference book to be picked up again and again.

The insight gained is invaluable.

The author's style is sprinkled with humor, and the reader is anxious to delve deeper into the human psyche. Once started, you cannot put it down.

Great advice for dealing with Emotional Vampires.

Written for women, The Manipulative Man is a detailed breakdown of the various kinds of men (behaviors). The subtitle really says it all, giving women help with these three main areas of identifying, countering and regaining.

The types are:

-- Mama's Boy

-- The Workaholic

-- The Eternal Jock

-- The Dependent Man (Woe-is-me complex)

-- Exciting Risk Taker & Full-blown Antisocial

-- The Womanizer

-- The Passive-Aggressive Man

-- The Narcissist

-- The Psychopath (and she says they are NOT all in prison)

-- Violent Manipulator

The last section is about why you might have chosen Mr. Wrong and how to make new choices--how to avoid the manipulation trap.

In each of the "kind of guys" section listed above, the author thoroughly explains the traits, behaviors, beliefs of each every guy does not have all traits), including their manipulative techniques.

Read the case studies, you can clearly see and hear the interaction and help you identify these kinds of guys. Most of the interactions are frustrated women who have already married one of these guys. The test at the end of each chapter will help you "score" him and what the score means.

Dr. McCoy explains that it's all about rules, consequences (likes like parenting) in dating or marrying these types. And the bottom line is: What do you want to do?

Some of this information was so real, so scary the book should carry a warning labels that says: Don't Read This Alone, in the Dark!

In Eternal Jock, for example, the popular athlete who all the girls wanted to date in high school and college, does not make a good husband and father until he "grows up" and realizes that THAT THE GAME OF LIFE can be exciting and give him the praise and attention his type needs.

Who should read this book? My copy goes to a single daughter and I've suggested to several dating friends why need to get their own copy--it's that good. It is like "Man 101" for all its easy-to-understand insights.

Armchair Interviews says: A woman of any age who is dating can learn a lot about men before it's too late--and she's been latched onto by one of these manipulators.