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32 of 33 people found the following review helpful
on March 31, 2009
My 23-month-old (still breastfed) son has just now started sleeping through from 8:30 pm to 7 am, every night. He's sleeping well because he's happy, comforted, comfortable, and secure - not out of exhaustion & frustration. We never did "let him cry it out", and were convinced there had to be a gentle, loving way to help him learn to sleep well - there is, and this book shows you how. I think this book has a lot to offer every sleep-deprived parent - co-sleeping or not, breast or bottle-fed - without making value judgements.

I can't say enough about the "No-cry sleep solution". I'm certain that I'd still be waking up 4-5 times a night with my son now (as I did for the first 20 months of his life) if it weren't for this book (the original or "toddler" version - I've read both). If you're looking for a loving & gentle alternative to chronic sleep-deprivation of the worst order, without any crying (for you or your child), this book is a great choice.

This book was recommended to me by an expert board-certified lactation consultant who I know & trust very well. She specifically commented that this book is compatible/realistic in expectations regarding breastfed babies, where she didn't feel that some other books, like "Baby Whisperer" are (and I agree with her on that).

Just to show how far we've come in three months, thanks to this book: I'm still breastfeeding my son, just not during the night. He understands this, and is OK with it (he says "Milk in the morning" with a smile as we get him ready for bed in the evening). After we finish cuddling & reading in the evening, he *asks* to go into his bed, where he clearly feels cozy and happy. He asks to hold hands with me for just a few minutes, then he lets go (while still awake), and I sit with him until he falls asleep, usually 10 minutes or so. He's asleep by 8:30 pm, and wakes up at 7 am, calling out "Mummy? Good morning Mummy!", rested and smiling (he *always* used to wake up crying, and was still quite obviously tired, but I think he just didn't know how to go back to sleep). We cuddle & he nurses first thing when he wakes up, and then we're ready to start the day. Now I'm sleeping enough that I can even get up and - gasp - have a shower and be dressed before he wakes up, so our morning routine to get out of the house is a lot faster & easier. And my husband and I are back in our own bed together, yay! I'm a much nicer & more patient Mummy with a decent night's sleep, and my son is very happy & well-rested now too.
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36 of 38 people found the following review helpful
on May 25, 2002
I was desperate and this book saved me. My 15 month old was waking up every 2 hours every single night. He wouldn't nap more than 20 minutes. I was seriously sleep-deprived.
I let my first baby cry it out 4 years ago - it took 5 weeks and she would cry for hours at a time, and I cried too. And then we had to do it over again after teething or a cold or a vacation. I still regret it, but back then I didn't think I had any other choice. But now there was no way I would go through that torture again, so I suffered through 15 months of sleeplessness instead.
A friend gave me The No Cry Sleep Solution 4 weeks ago and we have made incredible progress! My baby falls asleep so much easier and wakes up only once. He takes a 2-hour nap, too.
I love that this book doesn't assume that all babies - or all parents - are alike. It gives a tremendous variety of ideas to choose from. It covers every possible aspect of baby sleep - from routines, to habits, to the sleep environment, to creating sleep-cues, to reading your baby's sleepy signals.
The chapter on Basic Sleep Facts taught me all I needed to know about my baby's sleep problems, without being overly long or technical. I like that the reader creates a personal sleep plan from the many ideas in the book, and I like that the author doesn't dictate one right way. You can be a co-sleeper or a crib-sleeper, a breastfeeder or a bottle feeder, use a pacifier or not - she respects all your choices and gives you ideas to work within the range of your own comfort zone.
The tone is compassionate and caring, like reading a letter from a kind and wise friend. I plan to give this book as a shower gift and new baby gift every chance I get. No one should suffer through sleepless nights OR crying it out - this book is the absolute answer to gentle baby sleep -- and better mommy and daddy sleep, too. (There's even a chapter on how adults can get better sleep too.)
If your baby is keeping you up at night this is the smartest [money] you could ever spend. ZZZZZZZZ
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6 of 6 people found the following review helpful
on April 26, 2015
In March, my 6 month-old baby was sleeping in our room, and waking every 1 – 2 hours all night. My husband and I were exhausted and our relationship was suffering. Our baby would wake up when we went to bed unless we were extremely quiet. We were sneaking into bed in the dark desperate for him to stay asleep, but afraid to make the transition of moving him to his own room. We were frustrated and short-tempered with each other from all the nighttime wakings, and I was starting to feel resentment towards my little baby. I considered hiring a sleep consultant, but they are so expensive, I decided to try a book first.

I wanted a gentle approach to sleep, but all I could find were books that recommend a strict (impossible) schedule and cry-it-out, or books that give you a few suggestions and no plan, and basically tell you to wait it out. I was too desperate to wait, but I didn’t want to let him cry it out. I knew that the problem was that he couldn’t soothe himself to sleep. I had tried to let him cry it out a couple of times, but he would only keep screaming. I’d be in tears until I finally went and grabbed him and nursed him. He’d be asleep 5 minutes later, and I would wonder why I had put both of us through that. At the same time, I would feel guilty because I had just reinforced “bad sleep associations.”

I bought a copy of the No-Cry Sleep Solution, and read it cover to cover. The tone of the book is gentle and understanding. Elizabeth Pantley breaks down baby sleep and sleep associations in a way that makes sense, without judgment. She asks you to be realistic about your baby’s sleep, and to decide if there actually is a problem. If you are okay with waking up in the night, why worry about it? Don’t make changes just because you feel that your baby “should” be sleeping through the night.

The book provides you with detailed but user-friendly charts for tracking sleep, and a template for a sleep plan. There are also numerous suggestions for improving sleep, which you can incorporate into your plan. Some reviews I read of this book complain that the reader has to make their own plan – but I liked the flexibility of making a plan that works for my baby and me. Plus this way I learned how to help him sleep.

I did 3 days of sleep logs, then created a plan based on the template. Once I put the plan in place, I immediately saw a difference. Not that he slept through the night right away, but the stretches of sleep got longer. And then he did sleep through the night, and it was the most amazing thing ever! We still have occasional night wakings, but now – 2 months later – he sleeps right through from 7pm – 6 or 7am most nights, and he is a happy, rested baby. I feel like myself again, and my relationship with my husband is fun again.

I am very grateful to this book for giving me the comfort of a solid, dependable sleep routine. I now have confidence that I can help my baby go to sleep, and the skills to make changes to his sleep routine. For example, when we moved his crib into his own room recently, it went so smoothly – the No-Cry Sleep Solution gave me the skills to do this. If you’re looking for an alternative to CIO that actually works, I would strongly recommend this book.
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3 of 3 people found the following review helpful
on March 5, 2014
This book and this series has helped me in so many ways. I started out my journey with the No Cry Sleep Solution as a overly tired family. At the time my son was nursing and co sleeping. After reeding this book I quickly learned what was "normal" sleep and what I should expect from my little man. I have never been a fan of the "cry it out" method. I've always thought that babies cry for a reason and a tiny being so young could not possibly be trying to manipulate the situation, instead he was crying for his needs to be met. He just needed to be understood and feel safe. My goal when getting this book was to get more sleep!! Simple right? With in seriously a few weeks of using the tips and tricks in this book my son was down to two night nursings and sleeping in his own crib. I'm not saying that it will be that easy for every person and every baby, but it works very well for us. I refer back to this book on a regular basis whenever my son has troubles sleeping. The thing I really love about the way it is written is that I truly gave me confidence. The confidence to do and know what I already felt in my heart. This book helped me so much that I have almost all of the series. I have The No Cry Discipline Solution, The No Cry Picky Eater Solution (currently reading and love love love it!), The No. Cry Potty Training Solution, and Perfect Parenting. I honestly would love the entire series of every book she writes! The most touching thing tho was when, on a whim, I emailed Elizabeth. I was having trouble with taking my two year olds pacifier and couldn't find a lot on this in the books I have. She actually emailed me back. Her, herself emailed me back giving me some really great information on gently taking the Paci. I was so incredibly touched that as an author she truly cares about the families she is writing for. I can't say enough good things about this author and her books. I recommend all of them!!
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3 of 3 people found the following review helpful
on June 5, 2003
I've read the two popular sleep books by male doctors and was very dissapointed - they don't seem to understand what's in a mother's heart. It's easy for them to advise a parent to let a baby cry from a distance, but so hard to implement it when every pore in your body screams that it's wrong -- when it is the little love of your life who is crying desperately. Ms. Pantley is a mother and a woman. She has had four babies, and she truly understands that while sleep is important, letting your baby cry is impossible for some of us, as it was for her. Her book is an answer to my prayers. It is filled with kind, loving ideas that feel right to me. I am only a week into it but am already seeing improvement in my baby's sleeping, and I am amazed that it is happening without any crying at all. I have also learned so much about my baby's sleep, that I was able to clearly understand why he hasn't been sleeping well. I plan to give this book to every pregnant friend of mine, since my only wish is that I would have bought it sooner.
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4 of 4 people found the following review helpful
on November 3, 2003
If you want to sleep and you can't, or wont, make your baby cry it out, give this book a few weeks to work it's magic. E. Pantley gives parents for babies of all ages a series of ideas and steps that really do work. It is a gentle and caring process that only takes a few weeks. The book says it may take a month or so, but we started seeing results after one night.
My daughter (7 mo.) has gone from waking every 2 hours to sleeping straight through the night without crying it out - ever. I am now a sane mommy!
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2 of 2 people found the following review helpful
on November 27, 2014
One of Elizabeth's main ideas is that early to bed does not mean early to rise, insisting parents put their children to bed early and that it can only benefit their sleep at night. She also emphasizes that children should take longer naps, adamant that children who take longer naps will sleep longer periods at night as well. I took these ideas quite seriously, struggling to put my first child back to sleep during the day when he woke after 45 minutes.

Further she propagates estimates of how much total sleep children should get at different ages that are completely outdated. Those estimates seem to be based on Ferber's original estimates based on his observations in 1986. He has since updated those estimates with years of data from his sleep clinic showing results that are quite different. Most importantly, he outlines very clearly that children will sleep the same amount on average per day regardless of how long or how little their naps are!

So for example, a typical range of total hours (daytime and nightime included) for a child two years of age is 11-12 hours, with an average of 11.5 hours according to 30 years of data (not 13 hours as is posted in Pantley's book and elsewhere). The 11.5 hours is divided between naps and nightime sleep. So if your two year old is sleeping a 1.5 hour nap in the afternoon, that leaves 10 hours at night. As such, a night time sleep from 9:30 pm to 7:30 am is not just acceptable for a two year old, it's completely healthy and normal.

This fact helped our family tremendously!!! If my kid has a longer nap, I put him to bed later. If he sleeps a short nap I put him to bed earlier. It works and it makes sense. A lot of agony parents experience is related to unrealistic expectations and these are rampant in Elizabeth's book.

Parents that are looking for a no-cry sleep solution would still be wise to read Ferber's updated book. The practical methods that Pantley does offer such as establishing routine and cues etc. are all explained with evidence by Ferber and the cry-it-out recipe he offers is only offered there as a parent's last resort.
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2 of 2 people found the following review helpful
on January 14, 2014
As many parents who have a child with sleeping problems know, there are two basic schools of thoughts when it comes to "teaching" your child how to sleep - the "cry-it-out" school, and the attached parenting school. I have a strong conviction against using any methods that would cause the baby to cry unnecessarily, and have been reading many books from the no-cry "camp." What has been disappointing and distressing to me as a parent is that there are quite a few books from the no-cry camp that do not really make any concrete suggestions and tips as to what parents need to do to assist the baby in sleeping longer and sleeping un-interrupted. They go into extensive length either to explain to you why "cry it out" methods are harmful for the babies, or to encourage you to use your parental instincts to do "what feels right." As first-time parents who are starving to sleep, however, your instincts are foggy at best, and your mind just cannot tell you what needs to be done.

Pantley does a great job in first laying out in very straight-forward, but factual terms, the way babies sleep. It was extremely helpful to learn that a lot of the "problems" we are experiencing are actually quite normal, and as parents, our expectations need to be adjusted according to the developmental stages of the child. Pantley then goes on to provide an arsenal of tips and solutions, and offers a template where you can pick and choose the tips and strategies that fit your parental style, into a gentle, progressive, and thorough plan that would assist your child to eventually grow into a healthier sleep pattern that works for the baby and the family.

While it is still a bit of a struggle for my wife and I to help our child sleep through the night, the tips listed by Pentley are very helpful in moving us along. Things are slowly improving, and our baby, who was devastated through 19 days of sleep training, is now a happy child who is slowly but progressively learning how to sleep most nights. I would highly recommend this book, along with Anni Gethin's "Helping Baby Sleep," and Pinky McKay's "Sleeping Like a Baby" to any parents who are looking for a gentle, peaceful, and loving way to grow with your child.
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2 of 2 people found the following review helpful
on January 27, 2010
A couple weeks ago, my 10 month-old daughter was waking me up every hour and a half, every night... Each time, I had to breastfeed her and try to put her to bed without awaking her. It could take me about 4 tries (1 hour) to succeed, 4 to 5 times every night. The last night before buying The No-cry Sleep Solution, I slept 4 hours, in 4 parts, leaving me exhausted and crying in the morning. I NEEDED to do something, but was completely against the idea of letting my daughter cry.

Then I found THE book to help me. Elizabeth Pantley's No-cry Sleep Solution proposes sensible and sensitive tips to improve both your child's sleep and yours. Very respectful and sympathetic to our sleep-deprivation status, the autor helps us recognize the possible causes of this sleep problem and find the appropriate solutions for ourselves. The book is then suitable for many family situations (from breastfeeded babies, or families practicing co-sleeping, to toddler sleeping in their own bed).

As for myself, I saw a big improvement in only a few nights. My baby now goes to bed earlier, wakes up only once or twice during the night, and I am able to put her back in her bed at the first or, at worst, second try. She didn't have to cry a single minute, and this was achieved only by using minor amendments to our usual sleep routine. I am now looking forward to the next step, showing her how to fall asleep by herself and enjoying a complete night of sleep! I am confident we will succeed, because we now have a trusted counselor to support us. Thank you, Elizabeth Pantley!
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2 of 2 people found the following review helpful
on March 24, 2004
Just to say how great the "no cry sleep solution" is. I did not discover the book until 2mths ago and what a difference it has made to my sons sleeping habits! My son has been an awful sleeper since birth. He is now 22mths and has gone from;
*having no regular sleep pattern, being breastfed to sleep and waking up to six times a night to be fed
*regular naptime, bedtime routine, falling to sleep with a story and sleeping most nights from 9.30pm to 7.30am.
I could not believe it (especially as he has been a poor sleeper for such a long time). I found the book very interesting to read and the ideas simple to implement. There is a section that tells you how to log progress and I found this a real help with keeping me focused.
I am so happy to find a book which actually looks at the needs of parents and children (rather than just encouraging parents to 'leave' the child to struggle with sleep). My only regret is that I didn't find the book earlier and could have saved myself, husband and most importantly, son from struggling with sleep issues for so long.
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