The Prince & Me

Blame it on those repeat viewings of "Shrek" and "The Princess Diaries." If we'd been showing her "28 Days Later" and "Dawn of the Dead," she probably would have chosen "zombie" as her dream job.

When pressed, poor Em couldn't say exactly what duties a princess performed on a regular basis. She won't have a much clearer picture if she happens to see "The Prince & Me," in which sunny Julia Stiles -- whose range and personality deserve better material than this -- plays Paige, a pre-med student who ponders forsaking medical school to try her luck as, oh, just the wife of Edvard (Luke Mably), her former chemistry lab partner who just happens to be the crown prince of Denmark traveling incognito.

Wait, what's that? The king (James Fox) is in feeble health and is preparing to step down and let Eddie rule instead? Paige, baby, you're gonna be queen! Talk about a signing bonus!

The primary plot strands in the screenplay were well-worn when Sigmund Romberg composed his operetta "The Student Prince" 80 years ago, but the four screenwriters who assembled this romantic romp seem to think they're in uncharted territory here. Contrasts are carefully set up between Paige's just-folks family on their organic dairy farm in Wisconsin (where, hilariously, it's still short-sleeve weather, even at Thanksgiving) and Edvard's far more refined household in their suitably palatial home. There's a predictably difficult first encounter between a tipsy Edvard and a perturbed Paige, who, like the heroine of "The Student Prince" pays her bills by working as a barmaid.

Then the opposites attract, as Edvard enlightens Paige about Shakespearean speech -- you didn't think you were going to sneak by without a few "Hamlet" wisecracks, did you? -- and Paige gives Edvard lessons in the intricacies of doing your own laundry. If it weren't for Stiles' serene sassiness and a few welcome dashes of sarcasm from Ben Miller as Edvard's chaperone, the movie's first half would be a royal snooze.

The action -- and the interest level -- pick up markedly once the story moves to Denmark, where Edvard and Paige must face some life-altering choices, and Paige must deal with Edvard's regal mom (the magnificent Miranda Richardson), who doesn't like the idea of her son cavorting with a commoner.

As Paige tries to fill her demanding new role as a queen-in-training, the movie finally transcends its Cinderella complex and threatens to ask a few pointed questions about the place of old-style monarchies in today's world. There's even a hint of the late Princess Diana around the edges of the scenes in which Paige and Edvard attempt to escape the photo-snapping paparazzi.

Still, just like Julia Roberts' Vivian in "Pretty Woman," the filmmakers want the fairy tale, and before long "The Prince & Me" returns to its regularly scheduled programming, trotting out glorious galas and allowing the camera to all but drool over the sparkling treasures in the queen's vault. It's a sequence that could qualify as jewel pornography, and just the sort of thing that makes otherwise level-headed ladies -- and even a few precocious kindergartners -- want to chuck it all and run off with the first prince who comes a-knocking at the door.