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The Private Eyes (1981)

Tim Conway , Don Knotts , Lang Elliott    PG (Parental Guidance Suggested)   DVD
4.5 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (37 customer reviews)
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Product Details

Product Description


Don Knotts and Tim Conway star in The Private Eyes, a 1980 comedy about two bumbling detectives solving a murder. It's an impressively incompetent affair. Every ancient joke falls with a muffled thud as Knotts and Conway ham their way through the pointless story: The lord and lady of a capacious manor are killed, and the lord's ghost seems to have returned to knock off the staff one by one. There's an austere housekeeper, a snooty butler with compulsive twitches, a sexy upstairs maid, a deformed groomsman, and a buxom young heir to the estate, who of course is going to be in some state of undress before the movie is over. People get killed, their bodies disappear, Knotts and Conway wander aimlessly through secret passageways, dimly seeking some way out of this movie. Conway cowrote the script, so he gets most of the blame; Knotts was probably just happy to have the work. --Bret Fetzer

Product Description

Tim Conway, Don Knotts. The most inept investigators in the history of Scotland Yard are dispatched to a mansion to solve a murder. A classic comedy the whole family will enjoy! 1981/color/97 min/PG/fullscreen.

Customer Reviews

4.5 out of 5 stars
4.5 out of 5 stars
Most helpful customer reviews
6 of 6 people found the following review helpful
By A Customer
First the DVD review: This DVD was/is put out by "Hens Tooth" video. (Hens Tooth?) Features the original theatrical trailer, which in itself is a gem; a wonderful stills gallery featuring behind the scenes making of the movie...priceless! And an awesome commentary by Tim Conway and the Director Lang Elliot who offer tons of little know facts and insight to this classic! This DVD is crisp and clear and so is the sound! The only thing this DVD lacks are the deleted and alternate scenes and alternate angles they showed on TV back in 1984. (see below for details) But, I'm happy to take what they give!
I know this is going to sound odd, but this is my favorite comedy of all time! No question! I have always been a big fan of Tim Conway and Don Knotts! (Who isn't?) Both men are absolute geniuses and have been underused since this movie came out back in 1981. This movie left a huge impression on me when I was a kid! I have always wanted a house just like the one in this movie! Who wouldn't want a 252 room estate! You could almost sleep in a different room for a full year! I was equally impressed when I found out the house in this movie is a real house! It's the Biltmore House and gardens. The real house is in Asheville North Carolina. Although the Biltmore House doesn't have 252 rooms (darn!) it is an absolutely gorgeouse manor! I highly recommend you check out their website! They will even send you a free brochure which pulls out into a mini poster! I have one on my wall right now! Very cool!
Anyways, back to the review...This is one movie that can be shared with the whole family! When this movie came out I was 10 years old and was so impressed by the look of it, the hysterical comedy, the cast, and the mystery storyline!
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2 of 2 people found the following review helpful
4.0 out of 5 stars Can't Help But Laugh Oct. 22 2003
Buy this flick. You probably saw it on cable 20 years ago, or maybe some goof at the office told you about it. Here's why it's worth owning.
Somewhere along the way Hollywood decided films like 'The Private Eyes' weren't suitable for production. Not being a student of film or pop culture, I'm not really sure why. It probably cost next-to-nothing to make, is thoroughly enjoyable, and is suited for virtually any audience -- one could watch this with grandma or their drinking buddies.
Regardless, the world has changed, so thankfully we have little gems like this to remind us of how things ought to be. So while my buddies can rave about crap like the 'Matrix Returns,' I'll settle down and watch Conway and Knotts bungle their way through 90 minutes of side-splitting joy. Call me corny, but gags like the time pistol, which goes off every hour, or the never-ending supply of homing pigeons (gone awry) are priceless.
Sure, guys like Chris Tucker are funny, but I just can't see them pulling off any bit that doesn't involve dope, profanity, and/or both. That's not a knock on today's comedy, but anyone who's a fan of the art will get a kick out of 'the Private Eyes.'
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5.0 out of 5 stars Great comedy duo!!!!!! May 7 2014
By R Duck
Format:Blu-ray|Verified Purchase
Tim Conway & Don Knotts, one of the few comedy duo greats!!! As 2 bumbling detectives trying to solve the murder of a very wealthy man. The help gets killed off one by one, but the bodies dissappear. Follow these 2 along for lots of laughs.
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5.0 out of 5 stars Love this movie April 19 2014
Format:DVD|Verified Purchase
Hi I bought this for my father for Christmas one year and he loved it....great quality and thanks for making it available.
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4.0 out of 5 stars Walk down memory lane Jan. 7 2014
Format:DVD|Verified Purchase
I recommend this movie to anyone who was a fan of Three's Company or The Carol Burnett Show. It's got the goofy comedy of both with the acting talents of Don Knotts and Tim Conway. I remember seeing this movie when I was just a wee lass and it made me laugh then just as much as it made me laugh now. It's got a goofy, and at times, clever humour. Good, wholesome comedy, well, except for the pigeons amoungst a few other things...
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5.0 out of 5 stars Love it June 24 2013
Format:DVD|Verified Purchase
This movie is hilarious! I watched it as a kid and it takes me back!
So happy I found it on DVD here on Amazon.ca
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Format:DVD|Verified Purchase
Looking forward to watching "Private Eyes". I haven't seen it in years and finally found it on-line. Thanks for sending it so promply.
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4.0 out of 5 stars They're watching April 30 2011
A giant spooky house, a motley gang of servants, a femme fatale, and... a pair of detectives who probably couldn't locate their own backsides, even WITH a map. "The Private Eyes" is an entertaining little comedy that gently glides along on the slapstick, fun running gags and the duo of Tim Conway and Don Knotts.

Lord Morley and Lady Morley have been murdered, and Scotland Yard has sent in Dr. Tart (Tim Conway) and Inspector Winship (Don Knotts) to investigate. And after they almost get throttled by the butler for saying the word "murder," they begin investigating the strange assortment of servants -- the aforementioned homicidal butler, the uptight nanny, the sexy maid, the samurai cook who claims to only use his katanas for food, the crazy-eyed gypsy with his foot in a trap, and the incoherent hunchback.

But then the servants start being murdered as well, and a poorly-rhymed poem left next to their corpses. And the bodies vanish before the duo can show the Morley heir, Phyllis (Trisha Noble), leaving Tart and Winship scrabbling to prove that a murderer is still loose in the mansion. But of course, nothing is quite as it seems...

Despite the title, "Private Eyes" is not much of a detective story -- if you're like me, you'll have figured out the murderer's identity and the whole elaborate back-scheme in pretty short order. The fun is watching Tart and Winship bumble around the giant elaborate manor house, stumbling across dead bodies and murder machines.

The center of it all is Knotts and Conway -- they are simply hysterical as the uptight, long-suffering Winship and the oblivious, often goofy Tart ("So he must have read about us in the newspaper and called us in to solve his murder!").
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