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To Train Up a Child [Paperback]

Michael Pearl , Debi Pearl
1.8 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (144 customer reviews)
List Price: CDN$ 8.75
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Book Description

Dec 1 1994 1892112000 978-1892112002
Three thousand years ago, a wise man said, “Train up a child in the way that he should go and when he is old he will not depart from it.”  Good training is not crisis management; it is what you do before the need of discipline arises. Most parenting is accidental rather than deliberate.  Imagine building a house that way.  We don’t need to reinvent training.  There are child training principles and methods that have worked from antiquity.  To neglect deliberate training is to shove your child into a sea of choices and passions without a boat of compass.

This book is not about discipline, nor problem children.  The emphasis is on the training of a child before the need to discipline arises.  It is apparent that, though they expect obedience, most parents never attempt to train their child to obey.  They wait until the behavior becomes unbearable and then explode.  With proper training, discipline can be reduced to 5% of what many now practice.  As you come to understand the difference between training and discipline, you will have a renewed vision for your family, no more raised voices, no contention, no bad attitudes, fewer spankings, a cheerful atmosphere in the home and total obedience from your children.

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I can't believe I almost let all the negative reviews keep me from reading this book! I was horrified after reading the reviews, only to find they were completely exaggerated, and many false. Seriously, some people just added things that aren't even in the book to discourage you from buying. They continuously stress the importance of being sensitive to your child, but firm also, as to not need to "discipline" them often. They are very loving people, and the advice they give comes straight from The Lord. As my parents told me, convincing me to buy the book, the people with negative reviews are probably those who like to sit their kid in the corner for punishments. If that's the case, this book is not for you, and have fun with your child raising you!

About the Author

Michael and Debi Pearl have been married since 1971. They have 5 children and 22 grandchildren. Between them they have authored 15 books and 8 booklets which combined have sold millions. Much of what they write deals with marriage, child training, and homeschooling. One of their recent books, Good and Evil (Bible stories in Marvel comic format), has been published into over 40 languages with another 60 translations soon to be ready for press. The Pearl’s also publish a 40 page bi-monthly magazine with a subscription base of over 40,000. Needless to say they are prolific writers and public speakers On another note, Michael is an inductee into the International Knife Throwers Hall of Fame and holds several world titles, including Gold Cup winner of 2008-9, long distance thrower of the year with a record all time high of hitting a four inch target at 63 feet, and he is the undisputed best tomahawk thrower of 2009, holding the world title "1" class. When he is not teaching the Bible or speaking to audiences on how to have a good marriage and obedient children he is teaching kids how to stick a bullseye with a knife or hawk. Learn more about them and sign up for the No Greater Joy bi-monthly magazine at Debi Pearl grew up during the 1960s at the height of the hippie revolution and the Jesus Movement. The forced draft due to the Vietnam War brought a sense of eternity to the youth, provoking them to seriously consider their souls. It was a time of a great move of the Spirit of God. As a teenager, dressed in tie-dye tee shirt and long drooping peasant skirt, she stood on the highways and byways sharing the gospel and seeing miracle after miracle of God's amazing grace.

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Customer Reviews

Most helpful customer reviews
53 of 55 people found the following review helpful
By melissa
I am a Christian and a social worker. I have read the Bible in Greek, and I can tell you that this is not what God calls for.

If you google this book, you will find several cases where parents use its teachings to "train" their children, and end up killing them through: malnutrition, beating them for 7 hours straight, and leaving them outside in the cold.

Please, please, please don't abuse your children. There are ways to teach children how to behave without hurting or killing them.
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41 of 43 people found the following review helpful
"Spare the rod and hate your child" are the words of Mr. Pearl. I have two university degrees in theology from a highly accredited university and can confidently say that this is not a theologically correct interpretation of the Bible. The "rod" can be referring to the rod of a shepherd. A shepherd lovingly and assertively guards his sheep from dangers and leads his flock to safe pastures. A shepherd would *never* harm his sheep. Why? Because they are valuable to him - his livlihood and future. Jesus is the Good Shepherd, and would not beat his children (especially not babies). Violence begets violence. Christian parents - do NOT be fooled by these people!! Listen to those that have a real education in theology and are not just speaking based on personal opinion (this also includes not listening to pastors that do not have an accredited and thorough education in theology and scripture studies!). Child psychologists have proven that corporal punishment is harmful to children physically and psychologically. It is age discrimination and a hate crime to assault a child. Children are people and deserve to be protected to the full extent of the law. In Canada, corporal punishment is illegal and so is hate speech. Amazon removed a book on How to be a Pedophile, they should also remove books on How to Beat Your Babies in the Name of God.
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32 of 34 people found the following review helpful
1.0 out of 5 stars WARNING: A very unhealthy approach to parenting Sept. 17 2013
By Kevin
I do not feel it appropriate to support the authors with a purchase of the primary source; instead, my review is based on a days' worth of research entirely from secondary sources.

I became aware of this book through reading about Hana Williams, a 13 year old Ethiopian girl who died at the hands of her adoptive parents in the USA as a direct result of their disciplinary efforts, which in fact amounted to brutal emotional and physical torture; both were convicted. Many of the methods they employed are apparently suggested in this book. The book and its authors have also been cited as an influence in the similar killings of Sean Paddock and Lydia Schatz - in the Shatz case, this was stated by the District Attorney involved.

I have no doubt that the authors would not have intended the outcome suffered by Hana and would quickly argue that the Williams' were not following this book at all in spite of owning it. While this is a superficially plausible argument, deeper consideration is demanded.

Several other reviewers noted that the book proposes *intentionally setting up* a child to behave in some (possibly arbitrarily) undesired manner and then following her inevitable "misbehaviour" with punishment. I find this very troubling, as I have personally observed precisely this practice - which it could be argued is fundamentally sadistic - to escalate into severe abuse.

This book apparently suggests, among other things, pulling the hair of a breastfeeding infant for biting. Anyone who thinks the infant is acting maliciously is out of their mind. Any competent psychologist will quickly agree that a mother inflicting pain upon her infant at such a critical period of bonding has the potential for lasting emotional damage.
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28 of 31 people found the following review helpful
1.0 out of 5 stars It saddens me to see books like this exist Sept. 10 2013
By Ralu
This book has disturbed me. I can't say that I was able to read all of it. It's the kind of child abuse that makes parents like me get goosebumps just thinking about it.

That this is disguised as God's will is also sick. Here are some of my (LESS) favourite passages:

"The parent holds in his hand (in the form of a little switch) the power to absolve the child of guilt, cleanse his soul, instruct his spirit, strengthen his resolve, and give him a fresh start through a confidence that all indebtedness is paid.

A child properly and timely spanked is healed in the soul and restored to wholeness of spirit. A child can be turned back from the road to hell through proper spankings. “Withhold not correction from the child; for if thou beatest him with the rod, he shall not die. Thou shalt beat him with the rod, and shalt deliver his soul from hell (Prov. 23:13, 14). (p. 44)"

Twisting my faith to get me to beat my children. No thanks.

For me they speak to cruel and unemphatic parents. Not to mention misinformed that they would ever think that these parenting methods are effective in raising loving, confident and bright children. In fact abused kids have more chances of developing addictions or psychological problems. Or end up dead. Pretty much my worst nightmares for my kids.

And why so much focus on parent "power"?
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5 of 5 people found the following review helpful
1.0 out of 5 stars hateful hateful hateful Nov. 22 2013
By doreen
This book should NOT, i repeat NOT!!!! be sold by anyone. and Amazon should be ashamed of themselves for selling an item that encourages parents to beat their children to ensure absolute obedience. A spanking i can understand, if they child does something to deserve it. but this book is on par with the Malleus Maleficarum. GET THIS CRAQP OFF YOUR WEBSITE AND OUT OF YOUR STORES!!!!!!
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Most recent customer reviews
5.0 out of 5 stars Want Happier Children? Beat It Into Them! The Pearls Will Teach You...
Excellent advice for hiding the fact that you're abusing your children. After all, if you beat them until they're "happy", no one will suspect a thing. Not even you!!! Read more
Published 1 month ago by Maria De Leeuw
1.0 out of 5 stars One Star
Published 2 months ago by Lisa
5.0 out of 5 stars Great common sense advise read it for yourself
Great book! I own the whole series. If you tend to be a "sheeple" mentality type of person then this book isn't for you. Read more
Published 3 months ago by Carolina
1.0 out of 5 stars helpful tips for the child abuser on how to beat without leaving a...
In an interview the author describes his child rearing technique as 'similar to the one used to train a stubborn mule or a mean dog." It involves repeated whippings. Read more
Published 3 months ago by Sarah Denison
5.0 out of 5 stars Great book with many practical child raising tips
This was a gift for a friend. I have used it years earlier.

A must have for First Time parents. Read more
Published 4 months ago by P. Liang Siah
1.0 out of 5 stars Wrong
-5 stars. Don't read it. Don't do it. The smiling face on the cover is propoganda-- these behavior modification techniques inspire fear, not love.
Published 6 months ago by Sara Washbush
1.0 out of 5 stars A book on how to abuse your child
This book is purported to give advice on how to raise disobedient children. It advocates extreme punishment, and in its extreme advice, has lead to the death of children by others... Read more
Published 8 months ago by Brian
5.0 out of 5 stars This method changed my heart and child
I grew up being spanked by my parents out of anger and it created fear for me towards them as it was often not warranted. Read more
Published 10 months ago by Amazon Customer
1.0 out of 5 stars This has no buisness being sold in Canada
This book promotes child abuse. There are several cases where following the instructions of this book has led to a child's death. Read more
Published 10 months ago by Greg
1.0 out of 5 stars Sickening
What is wrong with these sick authors to promote violence in anyone, let alone children. I haven't read the book but saw the article on BBC news. Read more
Published 10 months ago by Asija
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