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Tug of War: A Judge's Verdict on Separation, Custody Battles, and the Bitter Realities of Family Court Paperback – Jan 1 2009


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Tug of War: A Judge's Verdict on Separation, Custody Battles, and the Bitter Realities of Family Court + The Best Interests of Children: An Evidence-Based Approach + The Equal Parent Presumption: Social Justice in the Legal Determination of Parenting after Divorce
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Product Details

  • Paperback: 200 pages
  • Publisher: ECW Press (Jan. 1 2009)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 1550228706
  • ISBN-13: 978-1550228700
  • Product Dimensions: 22.1 x 15 x 1.8 cm
  • Shipping Weight: 322 g
  • Average Customer Review: 4.3 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (6 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Bestsellers Rank: #42,547 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)


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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful By Jenni king on Oct. 20 2013
Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
I was incredibly fortunate. Not only did I get to read the book, but I also had Judge Brownstone preside over our family court case. It is unfortunate for any family to have to resort to the court room - and in most cases I am certain that it doesn't have to get that far. In ours, it did. With incredible common sense (not so common these days), and some straight talking, Brownstone spoke some honest truth into the court room, and ultimately stood for the good of the children. His wisdom is sage, and worth listening too. If you find yourself reading it and thinking 'what a load of crap', I'd recommend you take a humility pill and look again, for perhaps there is something you too can do to make that tug of war a little easier on the child for ultimately, they are the one in formation.

Let it be your guide!
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful By DLF on Dec 8 2011
Format: Paperback
"Breaking up is hard to do" are the lyrics to a song recorded by Neil Sedaka in 1962. Justice Harvey Brownstone talks about the problems of breaking up in his book published in 2009, which is described as the first of its kind. It explains what happens in Canada when a family unit disintegrates, especially when there are children involved.

Justice Brownstone is quite unique in that he also is the host of a t.v. talk show entitled Family Matters. He is more than willing to express his views, which he certainly has, having inquired a law degree in 1980, and in 1995, being appointed as a Provincial Court Judge, presiding mostly in North Toronto Family Court.

Justice Brownstone¡'s theory is that when people break up, they must adopt a mature approach of dealing with their former partners, especially when children are involved. However, he also addresses the topics of finances in a number of chapters, which describe how you can try to resolve your conflicts without going to court. He has a chapter on alternatives to litigation. He describes when going to court is necessary. There are also details about lawyers, what you should look for, and why they are very important in their role.

Especially close to his heart is the chapter on custody and access disputes. He talks about the importance of joint custody as a concept.
This book is not a fast read, but can be broken down into its chapters and approached in that manner.

Many senior judges in Canada have commented on this book and support his idea of public education in these areas.
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15 of 16 people found the following review helpful By supermoviefan on Nov. 28 2008
Format: Paperback
This is the first and only book ever written by a family court judge, specifically for the general public. It is not a legal textbook or self-help manual. Rather, it provides much-needed information for every separated couple contemplating going to family court to resolve parental disputes. The book explains what family court is, and equally importantly, what it isn't. The author uses many real-life anecdotes to show the reader how harmful family court is for families, and how bad litigation is for children. Family court litigation is not like the court cases we see on TV, and the judge gives strong reasons why people need legal representation from a lawyer who specializes in family law. There is a strong desire on the part of the author to convince people to use family court as a last resort, and consider dispute resolution alternatives such as mediation or collaborative law. Never before has the public been given an "inside scoop" on what family court is really like, and I found this book to be fascinating in every way. This book should be a "must-read" for every separated and divorced parent!
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