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Undead and Unreturnable Mass Market Paperback – May 30 2006

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Amazon.ca First Novel Award - 6 Canadian Novels Make the Shortlist

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Product Details

  • Mass Market Paperback: 288 pages
  • Publisher: Berkley (May 30 2006)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0425210812
  • ISBN-13: 978-0425210819
  • Product Dimensions: 10.8 x 2.2 x 17.4 cm
  • Shipping Weight: 91 g
  • Average Customer Review: 3.5 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (2 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Bestsellers Rank: #94,247 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

Product Description

From Booklist

In Davidson's latest Undead romp, Betsy Taylor, Queen of the Vampires, is busy planning her wedding, babysitting for her new little brother, and feeding the feral vampire who crochets in the basement of the mansion where she writes a "Dear Betsy" column for a new vampire newsletter. Hunky Nick, a cop from her past, is heading up the task force to find the Driveway Killer, who targets women who look like Betsy. Betsy's best friend, Jessica, starts going out with Nick, and Betsy, who can get into enough trouble on her own, may wind up in over her head with the help of her crazy sister, the ghost of a Driveway Killer victim, and a cute college boy. Diana Tixier Herald
Copyright © American Library Association. All rights reserved --This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.


“A lighthearted vampire pastiche…a treat.”—Omaha World-Herald “Seventh heaven for the fans.”—Kirkus Reviews

“MaryJanice Davidson is a refreshing voice to both the romance and vampire world of writing…I cannot recommend her enough!!”—Paranormal Romance Reviews

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By Cara Scott McCron on June 19 2013
Format: Mass Market Paperback Verified Purchase
I am really enjoying this series. Ms. Davidson has a very light touch. She has created characters that we care about and can root for. Betsy's character is delightfully real and humorous.
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8 of 12 people found the following review helpful By Catherine Cerveny on Dec 14 2005
Format: Hardcover
When I first stumbled across this series, I was pleasantly surprised. I loved the breezy writing and Betsy was just so much fun. Her quips and putdowns were wonderful. I loved her obsession with fashion, particularly shoes. I enjoyed the way her relationship gradually developed with Eric. Now that Davidson is four books into the series, I feel like she's rehashing old, worn material. Betsy is no longer humorous. Instead, she's annoying and clueless. She doesn't seem to learn anything from her past adventures (or misadventures). And for the life of me, I can't figure out why Eric is even interested in her---other than the fact that by being her consort, he gets to be King of the Vampires.
This book is a continuation of the themes in the third book. It ALMOST reads like Davidson's publisher decided to cut the third book in half just so they could publish two books instead of one and make more money. There's more about Betsy's half-sister and how she continues down the path to evil---who I don't even care about anyway. Other than that, not much else going on. One issue of note is sort of resolved, but there's no big confrontation at the end. No character grows or evolves or even really learns anything. Any new characters introduced are annoying. And the topper---we don't even find out what Betsy buys Eric for Christmas or if he even buys her anything! Also, Davidson seems to be forgetting her own basic character facts: no mention of Betsy's love of shoes, or the fact that Betsy has a cat.
Needless to say, I was very disappointed by this book, which is too bad. I was so looking forward to reading it.
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Most Helpful Customer Reviews on Amazon.com (beta)

Amazon.com: 106 reviews
74 of 80 people found the following review helpful
Hilarious and interesting as usual, but I wanted more... Nov. 4 2005
By CoffeeGurl - Published on Amazon.com
Format: Hardcover
I am a huge fan of MaryJanice Davidson's Undead series and I look forward to all of the installments. Her tongue-in-cheek approach to vampires is priceless. I also love the characters, especially Betsy, Jessica, Sinclair, Tina and Marc. And the bantering that goes on between them is hilarious to the max. Undead and Unreturnable is another gem as far as the quick-witted bantering and some character development are concerned; however, the plot is so thin it is almost non-existent. Betsy has quite a busy schedule. She is planning a traditional wedding to her consort and reluctant groom, the dark, gorgeous and stylish Sinclair, is getting ready for Christmas, agrees to babysit her newborn baby brother, and tries to keep her eye on her devil's spawn sister Laura. And now she has to worry about a serial killer preying on short-haired blondes with light eyes as well. She has to be careful, for she fits that description, but she also has to find the killer after one of his victims' ghost bothers Betsy to no end. There are various fun moments throughout the novel.

This novel, like all recent Davidson books, is disappointingly short, not much longer than an outline. The serial killer plot is very underdeveloped and is resorted in a quick, unsatisfactory way. The novel consists more of lighthearted bantering between Betsy, Sinclair and Jessica. Tina and Marc appear in a few scenes and nothing more. If anything, this novel is more centered on Betsy and Sinclair's relationship. I like that Davidson develops their relationship further in this offering, but sometimes the book in general seems chopped up and uneven. There is also some development centered on Laura, Betsy's sister, and how she has become all the creepier since Undead and Unappreciated. There is also a rather dark scene with Sinclair and Betsy that I like because it adds character depth and growth into the mix, no matter how fleeting the aforementioned character depth and growth may have been though. The characters remain great. I love self-centered Betsy, the darkly gorgeous Sinclair and the quick-witted Jessica. The vampire/librarian from previous MJD vampire novellas called Marjorie shows promise in this series and so does former Blade Warrior Jon and his suspicious interest in Betsy's life story. I guess what I'm saying is that there are some good, substantial moments in this short, light and at times lopsided continuation of the series. The novel is without a doubt hilarious. I laughed out loud as I read the novel, so Davidson's abilities with creating quips in her dialogues are still intact. And I know that she is still the same talented storyteller who wrote gems like Love's Prisoner and Undead and Unwed and I hope she will go back to that style of writing. She does leave some interesting cliffhangers for future offerings. I only hope that she will take her time in creating something more substantial and less abrupt next time.
46 of 56 people found the following review helpful
Running Out of Patience Nov. 18 2005
By Robert I. Katz - Published on Amazon.com
Format: Hardcover
Okay, I said I wouldn't, but I saw it at my local Border's and I spent the money. It's better than the last but that's not saying a lot. Judging from how quickly this one came out and the length of the two most recent books in the series, I remain convinced that Undead and Unappreciated and Undead and Unreturnable were meant to be one book, but got split up into two short, unsatisfactory pieces for monetary reasons. In this book, a little more happens, and a number of set-ups were put in place for future books: Sinclair's declaration that Betsy can have a baby if a living human is the father. Sinclair's inability to read Betsy's thoughts becomes an issue, as the Book of the Dead says that he should be able to. Laura's powers grow, and she seems more and more comfortable with the Devilish side of her make-up. This book is as poorly edited as the last. At one point, Betsy is riding in a car with Laura and a ghost. Laura makes a comment about being dead...except that she's not dead. Presumably the ghost was meant to have this line. Oh, well, it's still fun, and it's hard to blame an author who's finally hit it big, but in the end, she'll sell more if she keeps her fans happy, and stuff like this just won't do it for very long.
29 of 37 people found the following review helpful
Meh Oct. 25 2005
By Mouser - Published on Amazon.com
Format: Hardcover
Okay, in sports movies there is always that "darkest moment" where everything seems hopeless just before the feel-good end. The last book, "Undead and Unappreciated" could have been that, which explains why this one was so lackluster- It seems to be the end of the series (but it won't be. And I'm not so sure that's a good thing.)

Betsy, Queen of the Undead, rides again. But where was Tina the snarky? Where was Jessica the snarky? Where was Marc the snarky? In this one these funny characters basically chew the scenery, except there is a very tiny subplot where Jessica gets laid.

Queen Betsy and her sister Laura, daughter of the devil, spend all their free time together in this one, making it boringly wholesome for the most part. Or, that is, all the time she has when Bets isn't having, well, surprisingly boring sex with King Eric. And given what we know of him, how could it be boring? Yet, it is.

Even the Ant is relegated to nothing in this book that seems...well, flat. Nothing really happens.

Bets can see ghosts and goes on errands, helping them talk to their loved ones. Jon, of the Blade Warriors from book 2, moves in and does a biography on Betsy that turns into a book...named "Undead and Unwed". Gee, how...original.

Betsy tells Eric a deep dark secret and this time, it's he is who is afraid of her. But now the honeymoon is over, and they seem like an old married couple, and about as interesting. Yet Eric remains very fleshed out and matures well in this book, grudgingly I admit Betsy is still as dumb as ever but more patient.

Laura loses her temper and it seems...could the prophecy be true? Will she take over the world? Unknown, as it's not explored as well as it could be; a good plot left to trail off. George becomes more human-like and learns a new stitch, but that's about all.

Oh, a serial killer is running around Minneapolis and his last victim is the only funny, snarky character in the book, following Bets around. But that plot fizzles as it only really crops up in the last 50 pages and is resolved instantly, tying into the bare bones "is Laura evil?" plot (that will surely be all that drives book 5.)

It's nowhere near as funny as the last 3 and the plot just doesn't grab me. If you haven't read this "Undead' series yet, skip it. For a funny heroine that always keeps going, I would say get hooked on the Stephanie Plum novels of Janet Evanovich. If you're a fellow long-time fan, well, all we can do is hope the next one is a little better.

Don't blow 20 some odd bucks on this. Wait for the paperback version, just head to the library or bookstore and read this if you can't wait.

And P.S. - hope this gets back to Ms, Davidson. Please stop using the word "rape" so callously, I, like many others, find it offensive. You use it too lightly and it undermines what a horrible crime it really is.
6 of 7 people found the following review helpful
Unfunny and Unsexy March 27 2008
By CaterpillarGirl - Published on Amazon.com
Format: Audio CD
This is a review on the Audio Book version of Undead and Unreturnable by Mary Janice Davidson, read by Nancy Wu.

I really loved the first book of this series, Undead and Unwed, I liked the idea of a Vampire Queen who was Blonde and Tall and the ultimate girly girl, complete with a shoe fetish. The first two books were basically there to lay down the premise, to have Betsy discover her powers and her duties to both those she surrounds herself with (vampires and humans alike) and to those she is Queen of, although in my eyes she never gets beyond her own hang ups regarding her love life and her love for shopping. By the third book, Undead and Unappreciated all Davidson has done is introduce new characters and make them trod through boring storylines until you get to the end and wonder how a book series could spend so much time...on nothing. Onto the fourth book, I still had high hopes that Betsy would grow beyond banal sex scenes, shopping for shoes, berating her stepmother, babying her roommates, and ignoring her duties as Queen instead focusing her energy on making her boyfriend marry her. Seriously, that is what the first three are basically about! I know she discovers new powers, and that would be exciting if she did something with them besides go to starbucks in the daylight, and wonder endlessly about accessories! This book is about solving some local murders, and really all of 5 pages are devoted to just that, the rest are spent on yet again more boring sex, fights with her boyfriend, and her talking like a 16 year old hyped up on power bars. Are we supposed to care about her pending wedding? And the planning for it? Or her choice of pajamas, or what her family is doing? Not me. I want to see how she will grow into leading her people, how she will gain the entire planets vampire populations respect, but what do I get " my boyfriend is so totally hot" and "I would sell my soul for those shoes" and " oh crap I cant get a pedicure"

Now onto my views on Nancy Wu, who reads the audiobooks. She stinks, not just stinks, but she doesn't even comprehend what she is reading, I have caught her reading in a voice for one character, when its another. She makes a sexy male vampire sound like a drawling butler, a 21 year old male college student sound like he is 14 and in a bad news bear movie. Nancy is asian, and she sounds like it, and therefore our blonde betsy sounds like Mulan on No-Doze. I have listened to 4 audiobooks worth of terrible valley girl/cheesy vampire accents and I cant take it anymore. Her reading sex scenes is embarrassing to hear, in no way, shape, or form are they the least bit steamy, sexy or provocative.

So that's it for me, books, audio books or otherwise. Save your time and energy and go read the Southern Vampire series by Charlaine Harris if you like amazing vampire literature that is also smart and sexy
6 of 7 people found the following review helpful
Not One Of Her Best June 28 2006
By Samantha L. Sayre - Published on Amazon.com
Format: Mass Market Paperback
I'm not going to write a plot summary. Amazon provides that and too many other reviewers do also. This was not one of her best in this series. I really enjoy this series but I'm not sure if she meant to have it together with another book and the publisher split it or she wasn't on her game or what it was. This book rambled on and really didn't have a plot. The serial killer plot was there the whole book but they really weren't working on it. It was mostly Betsy talking to Jon or Eric about nothing. I wouldn't recommend this book except to get to the next one. I would wait and hope that she puts a bunch of the books together then this one won't be so noticeably short.