I have seen some Bad Action movies in my time, but nothing could have prepared me for "Universal Soldier - The Return". It makes your average Straight-to-Video Action film look like "Die Hard".
Once Again, Van Damme Surrounds himself with Poor Actors so he looks All the Better. Only Michael Jai White Stands a Cut above the Rest as the Super villain. Goldberg's is one of the most Moronic, Annoying Performances I've Ever Seen in my Entire Life. Every time he Opens his Mouth, a Plethora of Crap Dialogue and Horrendous Acting follows. Some may blame the Dialogue, but many films in this genre have Bad Dialogue, it's the Actors Job to make it sound good, Sadly, Goldberg is No Actor.
"Universal Soldier 2 - The Return" has, on the surface, Everything a By-the-Book Action Flick Needs, the Obligatory scene at a Strip Joint, (here they have to go there to use their Computer... Try to Stomach That) The Love Interest (an Exact Copy of the Love Interest in the Original, but Far more Aggravating) and Plenty of Action... (one such scene includes a Wrestling match with Goldberg against 2 Hospital Orderlies that are Bigger and more Muscular than Van Damme and Goldberg Combined) It's a Shame that the Action is Poorly Shot, Poorly Edited, Poorly Conceived, Poorly Timed, Poorly Choreographed, and Poorly Performed.
If you've Seen the Film, you know what I'm Talking about, If you Haven't seen it; you haven't the Faintest Idea what I'm Talking About. There is No Reason I can Think of to Recommend this film to Anyone, except maybe people who like to Torture themselves. But Average Joe's like Me, if you are Listening... Run, Run Away from this Movie, Don't Even Look at the Cover... If it's One your TV, Smash your TV, if a Friend Hires it, Get New Friends, If Van Damme Himself Pleads with you to Watch it, Chastise him for me and Every Other fan of the Truly Classic Original "Universal Soldier", a film that will Never be the same Again.