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Valentine (Widescreen)

Denise Richards , David Boreanaz , Jamie Blanks    R (Restricted)   DVD
3.2 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (167 customer reviews)
Price: CDN$ 48.97
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Product Description

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Five comely and well-to-do female friends receive dire threats inside anonymous valentines. When two of them meet violent ends, the remaining trio suspect that the killer may be a nebbishy former classmate whom they spurned years before at a school dance. Their solution: Throw a lavish Valentine's Day party, all the better to distract them from the hulking, cherub-masked killer...

As the above suggests, Valentine is the absolute nadir of the post-Scream slasher film. Australian director Jamie Blanks (whose previous effort was the equally dismal Urban Legend, 1998) obviously had lofty goals for his film, given his bald-faced homages to John Carpenter and Dario Argento. But he hasn't a clue as to how to generate suspense, and his frequent reliance on well-worn shock effects (hands dropping on shoulders, etc.) suggests more contempt for the genre than affection. No less than four writers (including two writer-producers for Roswell, which explains the appearance of series star Katherine Heigl) contributed to the screenplay, which fails to generate the twentysomething drama and hip, cutting dialogue required for this brand of horror. As the five friends, actresses Marley Shelton, Denise Richards, Jessica Capshaw, Jessica Caufield, and Heigl have little to do other than alternately look attractive or afraid; Richards, in particular, looks weary of playing the man-eater. As Shelton's dipsomaniac boyfriend, David Boreanaz (Angel) lumbers through each scene with an embarrassed scowl.

Warner Bros.' DVD includes commentary by Blanks, as well as cast and crew interviews and a video for Orgy's contribution to the noisy, new-metal soundtrack. --Paul Gaita


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Most helpful customer reviews
3.0 out of 5 stars Denise Richards? I'm there. March 19 2004
By Aaron
Format:DVD
The characters weren't really likable. As the supposed killer sought revenge on the folks who tortured him in school, I didn't mind that they got killed. That's a new twist for me. No problem there... but with stiff acting and dull sets, no tension built up. So when the killer went after each victim, I fast forwarded (knowing I would miss no dialogue) through the soundtrack and visual cliches. But I didn't fast forward through Denise Richards at the hot tub... there was tension... not from fear :-). Most of the actors are good looking and "hip," like a Melrose Place episode. But the character development is so weak, I had a hard time remembering who was who: "Which skinny straight haired blonde with an 'oh ma god' tone is this one?" And the killer in the mask looks a lot like John, Ponch's partner in CHIPS. Not too scary :-). The ending was much better than I expected. But I expected a weak ending in part because the build up was weak. In short: good looking folks, Denise Richards, hot tub, good ending.
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3.0 out of 5 stars eh... March 13 2004
Format:DVD
OK. This will not go down as a great horror classic. Even Denise Richards as the main eye candy can't really raise this film above mediocre.
A kid is humiliated at a junior high dance and seeks revenge. Not against the guys who beat him up, but the girls who wouldn't dance with him. The only person J.M. should have went after was the girl who lied and said she was attacked when it was obvious she liked what was going on behind the bleachers.
The kills are OK, the body bag neck slice could have been better though. The arrows to the stomach and dumpster fall was OK. Denise in the hot tub was by far the best kill. It kind of reminded me of those arcade whack-a-mole games. (I'm up! Drill!)
The ending had a cute little twist, but it wasn't hard to figure out. So not only is her boyfriend an alcoholic, he's a psychotic killer who not only kills her friends, but gets her friend blamed for it.
Advice for future horror film makers. A hockey mask works. A Michael Myers mask works. A burned up face and a dirty hat works. A retarded cupid doll mask.....does not work.
I did like the freak dude Gary down the hall though. Hey Kate! Be my Mate! Want a date? Is it too late? Can't wait! Have you ate? It's fate. Don't hate.
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3.0 out of 5 stars Better than Urban Legend, that's for sure July 22 2003
By Kolors
Format:DVD
You know, it's hard not to like this film at least somewhat. You have to give this film's ambition credit. Following in Scream's footsteps, this film aspires to be part of the whole teen horror flick craze, I just think it came a bit late. I think since I saw Urban Legend a few years back, I realized that this trendy type of formulaic teen horror flick was on its way out finally. Since movies like Urban Legend, I Still Know What You Did Last Summer, The Faculty, and Final Destination came out, people no longer have faith or interest in this type of horror film anymore and that is why this film was mostly overlooked. Although this film is better than most of those films I just mentioned, it still kind of falls short, although it did provide some entertainment value. Sometimes I did feel like I was watching Scream 2 and I noticed that some the opening shots of some scenes were heavily reminiscent of Craven. Altogether, not a bad film. I admire the film's aspirations more than anything, but I think this film belongs in 1997 where it could have wetted our thirst for more teen horror flicks more successfully.
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5.0 out of 5 stars Sweet Revenge July 9 2003
By A Customer
Format:DVD
This movie is all about revenge. Its scary from beginning to end!!! Its about these 5 girls who made fun of this boy, Jeremy Melton in the 6th grade. In addition, they all wouldn't dance with him. Well, 13 years later he comes back and kills all of them, except for 1. See this one girl said to him at the dance in 6th grade, that she would maybe dance with him later. And also, she didnt really make fun of him. The ending at this movie is great!!! It has a twist of confusion and suspense!!! Jamie Blanks is a graet director! He delivers suspense in all of his movies!!! Even though he only directed three. Two of his movies are horrors, which are "Urban Legend" and "Valentine" The other movies which was his first is a musical. Well both of his movie have like a real story to them. Like Urban Legend. In Urban Legend the killer is making all the murders based on Urban Legends. And in this one Valentine. This is about geek who comes back 13 years later, and got plastic surgery and worked out. And he kills all the girls who were mean to him!!! This movie is also good because almost at the end, when 3 of the girls were killed, except for Dorothy and Kate who is the one who said that she would maybe dance with him later back in 6th grade. And well, he asks Kate to dance with him. She accepts even though shes scared because everyone is missing, one of her friends are dead, someone keeps on sending all of the girls threathing cards, the detective who was suppose to come to the party is dead, and there is still a killer on the loose. Also, because he is drunk. And he gets scary when hes drunk. So, that scene just gives you a chill. And you just say to yourself that was a clever scene. This movie has alot of clever scenes, and i think its original. And its not like a teen movie. Its like a revenge movie. Read more ›
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Most recent customer reviews
4.0 out of 5 stars A Good Horror Movie
This movie was a pretty good movie, it was not one of my favourites but I did like it .
Published 17 months ago by Jennifer Scott
2.0 out of 5 stars not impressed
I had read this book before I saw the movie. I was so impressed with the book I bought the movie but was sadly disappointed. Read more
Published on Oct. 19 2011 by Rose
4.0 out of 5 stars above average for the genre (3.5/5)
as far as horror movies go,this one isn't bad at all.in fact,it's
pretty decent.i think one of the reasons is that it also liter in tone
than most of the genre. Read more
Published on Dec 15 2007 by falcon
5.0 out of 5 stars Awesome Horror Movie
This movie totally rocks! its not as scary as others and it isnt really gory, but I love the plot! A loser named Jeremy Melton(Joel Palmer) gets turned down by every girl he asks... Read more
Published on May 10 2005 by Chelcie
1.0 out of 5 stars David Boreanaz Fans Don't Waste Your time.
I was so disappointed with this film. I had hoped this movie would show off David Boreanaz's talent. Who knows. Read more
Published on May 17 2004
3.0 out of 5 stars Look Out!
Just a quick addendum to my review below. I just read Mr. Yoon Min Cho's review entitled "Garbage" (12/21/03). Whoahhhh! I do believe he protests too much! Read more
Published on March 19 2004 by Aaron
3.0 out of 5 stars "Sream" on valentines day!
This movie reminds me of the scream trilogy. Some outkast from someones past wanting revenge for this time something about what looks like a broken heart? Read more
Published on Feb. 24 2004 by david dewitt
5.0 out of 5 stars The best moddern day horror film of them all!
Let me start out by saying that this movie will make the easily scared piss their pants! The origionality of this film is so hard to come by these days. Read more
Published on Feb. 15 2004 by Kathy
2.0 out of 5 stars WELL, HERE WE GO AGAIN
JUST WHAT THE WORLD NEEDED, ANOTHER SCREAM-TYPE HORROR MOVIE. A MISTREATED BOY GROWS UP TO BE A SERIAL KILLER. JUST YOUR AVERAGE TEENAGE HORROR FLICK. Read more
Published on Dec 16 2003 by MICHAEL TAYLOR
3.0 out of 5 stars Nothing too special
Ya know it's sad. I was that kid on Valentine's day everyone, even like my best friend ignored. Hence why it was called Singles awareness day. Read more
Published on Nov. 18 2003 by Gavin
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