War of the Robots / It's Alive [Import]

First, "War of the Robots":

This version was shown at a B-Movie festival in 2010, and it had people crying out for the movie to end about 4/5s through. The dubbing is bad, and the acting and plot are hard to understand and bereft of any life at all. On the other hand, Yanti Somer is cute...

There really aren't any robots per se, and there's not much of a war unless you consider the uninspired, mind-numbing space battle in the last 30 minutes of the movie a "war".

What sets this print apart, hilariously, is that after a character dies in this seemingly interminable space battle, a few minutes later the movie SKIPS BACK to a part where he is suddenly alive again and states (again) "It's hard to get away from me!" This had many people bewildered and laughing at the Festival. I have another copy of this movie, and the mistake doesn't happen there. Thanks for the flub, Alpha Cinema!

The second movie, "It's Alive!", is not the 1970's horror flick. It's a sub-par, creepy-but-ultimately-bland and silly movie about some hill-billy in the Ozarks (but who's caring?) who traps people and feeds them to his cave-dwelling lizard monster. It has Tommy Kirk to prod the film along... there's a long, coma-inducing flashback, and overall it's another tough movie to trudge through.

Lots of room for making fun of these films if you have the fortitude to tough it out, not for the faint of heart.

Three stars because of the unintentional misprint hilarity, and because I have no idea how to rate such an amazing mess of movies.
Oh! And alpha cinema has a "Coming Attractions" feature that has some great cheesy trailers, an added bonus.

It's Alive is one of the best Z-grade movies I have seen in a long time, and I got some gut busting laughs at its expense. It is slow moving and features really bad quality filming, but the creepy main actor, absurd editing and preposterous situations (especially the prisoner/maid who is "tortured" with a dead mouse and a whistle) were so hilarious that I could not take my eyes away. For anyone who enjoys bad horror/scifi, highly recommended. For anyone who will take it seriously, perhaps take a pass. The War of the Robots was incredibly boring, I am not sure how I made it through and yet I did. The real gem in this collection is It's Alive.

So three people have been locked in a cave by a Deliverance-style hillbilly because he has a sea monster in there that will enjoy eating them. They pull hopelessly against the steel bars that imprison them. Meanwhile, the hillbilly's wife feels sorry for them and enters the cave from the back entrance to bring them food. As they are moaning about how they'll never get past the bars, she suddenly shows up from behind them. Do they overpower the old lady and make her lead them to safety? Do they hold her hostage so the hillbilly guy will let them out? Do they simply follow her when she leaves? NO! She leaves and they go back to pulling on the steel bars. "We've got to get out of here!" Deliciously preposterous. I guess I recommend it after all.