Win the Whining War & Other Skirmishes: A Family Peace Plan Paperback – Jan 1991
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From Library Journal
Any adult who has spent any time with a whining child knows that even an hour can drive a person crazy. Whitham, a staff therapist for the UCLA Parent Training Program, has developed successful techniques for diffusing the whining, complaining, sassy, dawdling, or annoying child. Positive reinforcement of behaviors parents like is her key: praise the act one approves of, ignore bad behavior, and set limits (clearly explained) on intolerable behavior. This book is so well presented, easy to read, positive, and chock full of ideas that even the most worn-out parents and teachers will approach their children with patience, firmness, good will, and love.
- Linda Beck, Indian Valley P.L., Telford, Pa.
Copyright 1991 Reed Business Information, Inc.
About the Author
Top Customer Reviews
Do you want to learn how to stop: whining, tantrums, dawdling, bad language, name calling, teasing, spitting, biting, talking back, interrupting, complaining, sulking and fighting, this is your guide.
Cynthia Whitham is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker who specializes in parent training. She also gives workshops for parents, teachers and therapists. She uses the ideas in this book at home with her own children.
Cynthia makes an excellent point about children finding negative ways to get attention. She recommends complimenting the good behavior and seeing if that helps change the situation.
"The more positive attention you give, the better things get."
This is a very organized book. Not only can you organize the behaviors you love, dislike and want to stop, you can also pick them right off a nice list.
I also loved her ideas of "do say and don't say." There are things that will encourage a variety of behaviors you might not want to encourage even when you are being positive. This has to do with sibling rivalry and making a child successful at the expense of others. Being compared to your brothers and sisters just isn't fun.
You will also see the value of:
Making praise a habit.
Making Big Tasks Manageable
How to use "Ignore" to the best advantage.
Offering choices (oh, this is a good one and it works)
Making a better behaviour chart
This book presents practical solutions to everyday problems.Read more ›
Cynthia Whitham's (a licensed clinical social worker specializing in parent training and associate director of the prominent UCLA Parent Training program) solid suggestions proved as easy to implement with my 3-year-old as were with my 11- and 10-year-olds. And unlike some experts, she offers detailed steps to her simple solutions, with consideration give to the age of the child.
If there's one book I actually enjoyed and found effective among the myriad of parenting tomes I've picked up along the way, it's this one: "Win the Whining War & Other Skirmishes: A Family Peace Plan".
If you want to dial down the yelling and ramp up the compliance level in your home -- this is your book.
The main point of the book is this: Look for the positive and praise it and ignore the negative behavior.
For example, if your child whines when you tell him/her to clean his room you praise the fact that he picked up five of the toys without whining. Ignore the fact that the child whined while picking up the other 200 toys. The idea is that eventually the child will pick up the whole room without whining.
Ha- I haven't found that to be the case while teaching and I haven't found that to be the case with my children (age two and younger).
I think you can easily skip this book and find a more comprehensive book with more ideas that are better suited to reality.
Most recent customer reviews
My husband and I first became familar with this book when we attened a parenting class at UCLA which Cynthia Whitham taught. It was based on the principles of this book. Read morePublished on Aug. 9 2004 by Kelly A. Grall
This book is an excellent resource for parents and educators alike. Written in clear simple language the book offer practical solutions to everyday problems we face with young... Read morePublished on June 15 2003 by Shrink
After reading Whitham's book my husband and I are now in the driver's seat. The advice she offers is practical and easy to follow. Read morePublished on June 10 2002 by eric b wilkinson
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