To focus on one thing- the advice given in Chapter 14, 'Counseling Women Abused as Children' is absolutely horrendous.
"If you have done a good job pointing your counselee to her own sinfulness, the topic of confronting and forgiving her abuser will be more easily accepted."
The last thing most abuse victims need to focus on is what they did wrong. They've probably had enough blame heaped upon them already.
"Caution is advised when making any accusations of abuse, especially if there is any question as to whether the abuse actually took place. You must rebuke with the thought in mind that you might be wrong, you might have misunderstood."
You THINK you were raped, but it might just be a big misunderstanding, so- go easy on 'em in case you're the one who's wrong. Because you can never really tell.
"Forgiveness is to be granted to the offender only if the offender asks for it."
If this were true, the offender would be able to control the victim with it for the rest of her life! This is telling someone they have to stay angry and upset and hurt indefinitely, waiting for the abuser to repent. The offender may never ask for forgiveness. (Might even be dead. Then what.)
"Since the possibility exists that your counselee might need to bring charges against the offender either in the church or the state, forgiveness must not be granted unless the perpetrator is repentant. This is because forgiveness is a promise made, 'I will not hold this against you any longer. I will not bring it up again to anyone, including myself.' "
..."Although forgiveness is not granted to the unrepentant, you must grant forgiveness to those who ask for it (Matthew 18:21-35)."
Forgiveness is from God to man- forgiving sin, and from person to person, forgiving injury. (Physical, financial, emotional, etc.) Whether or not the state files criminal charges is a completely separate issue. (Forgiveness for the sin, and JUSTICE for the crime.) It's SO WRONG to tell someone who is hurting that "you must grant forgiveness to those who ask for it" and then tell them, OOPS! It would be wrong for you to hold that person accountable for the crime he committed, should've thought of that before you forgave him!
Hey perps! Just say the Magic Words, and stay out of jail!
Also- "I will not bring it up again to anyone"? That can be dangerous too. Let's say your father molested you from ages 6-12. No one else in the family knows about it. He comes to you & says "I repent, and you have to forgive me, or God wont forgive you." Your brother has a baby daughter. Are you never going to warn him about what could happen to her at her grandfather's house? After it does happen, how will you feel? How will she feel about YOU when she finds out someday that you could've protected her and didn't? Long story short- forgiving people does not obligate us to enable them by keeping their secrets. This also perpetuates the shame of the victim, in being not allowed to tell.
There's plenty more, but hopefully you get the idea. It's all backed up with Bible verses of course, carefully chosen. There are just as many representing my point of view too, but comparing them all would be a book in itself.
I really, really hope that anyone who counsels women abused as children has enough sense to reject the teachings of this book.