2.0 out of 5 stars
Adoption for the Current Generation, Aug 18 2003
I read most of this book in one night - not because it was amazing but because it made me angry. The author creates a portrate of adopted children through sweeping generalization that would have you believe they are all damaged goods. How do I know this is not true? Because I'm adopted too.
I found the experiences in this book were from a different generation - one where adoption was a stigma to hide. Most of the experiences and focuse around lies told to children and the effects of a culture that viewed adoption as a dark secret. How wouldn't a child be damaged in a system like that! This is a book, written in 1979, is for a different generation of adopted children. It does not necessary reflect adoptions today, or those of my generation. If I were a potential parent looking to adopt today, this book would leave me hollow.
Not to say this book is without some saving graces for the adopted. For those who parents misguiding lied to them, or who grew up when adoption was still a stigma, for those who are seeking or who have bee sought out this could be an excellent resource.
I don't speak for all adopted children but I think the current generation is given more information and is supported in a variety of ways. It is not an easy path for any of the people involved, there are still legal battles as well as personal ones to be fought and won. I suggest seeking out other materials that are more helpful - such as Twenty Things Adopted Kids Wish Their Adoptive Parents Knew.
Each of us has scars, adopted or not. It is up to us to find ways to recognize them and to heal. For some that means moving past an old life, for others it means finding it.
To the adopted, their families, and those who may one day be part of the adoption triad there is so much more than this book covers. So much more happiness and love that is possible.
Good luck in your search.